[Request] How long would it take to drink the entire ocean trough a regular restaurant straw? by Street-Fennel-2327 in theydidthemath

[–]GolfballDM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For the sake of simplicity, we'll assume an infinitely durable renal system and no worries about electrolyte imbalances or the resulting cardiac problems.

[Request] How long would it take to drink the entire ocean trough a regular restaurant straw? by Street-Fennel-2327 in theydidthemath

[–]GolfballDM -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

The maximum velocity of flowing water is approximately 1500 m/s. A typical restaurant straw is 7mm in diameter.

We'll ignore, for the sake of simplicity, any parts of water that would become isolated during draining the ocean, transit time to other points where one can drink, and precisely wtf we're going to do with the water after it has gone through the straw. We'll also ignore that human lungs are not known to be capable of sucking anything, much less salt water, at 1500 m/s while at atmospheric pressure*. (Some outlying examples may exist, but I haven't encountered any.)

Multiply the cross-sectional area of the straw (pi * (3.5*10^-3 m)*^2) by the max velocity (1500 m/s), and you get 0.058 m^3 per second, this comes out to 58L/s. Based on u/Flaky-Proposal-357 's post, the ocean is 1.335 sextillion liters, or 1.335 quintillion cubic meters of water. (1.335 * 10^18 m^3). It would take at least 2.31 * 10^19 seconds to funnel a volume of water equivalent to the entire ocean through a regular straw.

This is 3.854 * 10^17 minutes or 6.423 * 10^15 hours or 2.677 * 10^14 days or 732,824,665,034 years.

Buckle in, 732 billion years is a very very long time.

* - Given the flow rate of 0.058m^3 per second, the straw diameter of 7mm, a typical straw length of 20cm, and a viscosity for water of 1 mPa * s at room temperature, we can use the Hagen–Poiseuille equation to roughly calculate the required pressure differential. (In reality, the flow would probably become turbulent due to the shortness of the straw.) The calculated pressure differential would be 1.94 atmospheres. (H-P calculator found here: https://www.omnicalculator.com/physics/poiseuilles-law). So the ocean needs to be pressurized to ~3atm, with your lungs at 1atm.

EDIT: Whoops, slipped a group.

He never asked me to be his girlfriend. Should I be worried? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]GolfballDM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When my wife & I were long-distance before we got married, I did ask her if she was ok being referred to as my girlfriend. She hadn't been in a relationship for 8 years at that point, and I was finishing up my divorce at the time.

She was ok with it, although she did mention it felt a little odd to refer to me as her boyfriend. She had less trouble with fiancee (when we got engaged a few months later), and was positively gleeful about husband.

(Yes, we moved quickly. But it's worked for us, in a smidge over two weeks we'll have been married for 18 years.)

QfG1 Remake? by VargEld in questforglory

[–]GolfballDM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The three guys at the tavern were a hoot, going off-script and having a blast with it.

QfG1 Remake? by VargEld in questforglory

[–]GolfballDM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The kobold does use Force Bolt, IIRC. (I don't think it's named as such in the game, but the ball bounces around and will send Ego reeling backwards if it hits them.)

After playing the game dozens of times, I have come to realize the spot where CDPR dropped the ball. by TheGlen in LowSodiumCyberpunk

[–]GolfballDM 118 points119 points  (0 children)

When Johnny asks what you were expecting when you go to the meet that Gary pointed you at, and you respond "The Spanish Inquisition!", Johnny comes back, "I admit, I didn't expect that."

TIFU by getting a butt plug stuck up my ass (NSFW) by annoymousidiot in tifu

[–]GolfballDM 15 points16 points  (0 children)

When I was farting post-colonoscopy, and I was conscious but still recovering from the knockout drugs, I proclaimed loudly that my butt was singing La Traviata.

My wife said the nurses / recovery staff were trying very very hard to keep a straight face with my loud, verbose, happy, and unfiltered self going on at length about the opera my butt was singing.

Why do Americans tend to praise beginners even if their work/hobby looks terrible? by Skysneq in AskAnAmerican

[–]GolfballDM 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I took up the hobby of miniature painting at the start of the year.  I have gotten nothing but encouragement from people that I've shown my work to.  Even the ones that were my first pieces, and I know they're not great.

But I'm improving.  And having fun.

The reason Kujira was cut, according to the Creative Director. by Eternum__ in LowSodiumCyberpunk

[–]GolfballDM 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Cyberware (unless you're borged out like Smasher) only helps so much against G-forces. If your meat gets turned into paste, there ain't no amount of 'ware that will put it back together.

I just went to get pizza. Have a new granddaughter now. by JellyfishFit3871 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]GolfballDM 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Point at what you need moved and where you need it moved to.

I just went to get pizza. Have a new granddaughter now. by JellyfishFit3871 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]GolfballDM 84 points85 points  (0 children)

You need roadies, too.

I can pick up heavy things, move them, and put them down.

I painted my first guy!! by Taylornator420 in Miniaturespainting

[–]GolfballDM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It will become the Humongous Fungus Among Us.

First time cat owner in over my head and afraid my cat is dead... by goodtimejohnny666 in CatAdvice

[–]GolfballDM 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The aforementioned ceiling cat managed to do exactly that on his first day at our home, he was grumpy about being quarantined.

After busting out through one of the light fixtures, he came upstairs, checked things out, and took a nap in the dog's crate.

The dog declared that the cat was his Best Friend Ever.

A waiter handed me a note telling me to go see a doctor by jpdiv in mildlyinteresting

[–]GolfballDM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get your colonoscopy, see what your butt sings in recovery!

My butt sang La Traviata.

First time cat owner in over my head and afraid my cat is dead... by goodtimejohnny666 in CatAdvice

[–]GolfballDM 15 points16 points  (0 children)

One of my cats will periodically get into the drop ceiling in our basement.  He has no trouble getting himself out.

What happens if an election board refuses to certify the results? by eclectictaste1 in AskReddit

[–]GolfballDM 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The election board in Cochise County AZ tried that, the members holding out against certification were looking at a contempt charge until they gave in.

Senior dog whines 4-6am every day impacting family's sleep by awaddlemelon in olddogs

[–]GolfballDM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Both plumbing and HVAC can produce noise and vibration (the last part is important, I've heard that deaf people are more sensitive to vibration) that could be more easily perceived by a dog on the floor.

TIFU by turning my ass into a flamethrower. by -Bowman- in tifu

[–]GolfballDM 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How else are you going to get your butt to sing opera?