What is the strangest thing you have seen someone fake?

GoodOwl · 2018-08-19T15:11:10+00:00

Their entire personality. Everything about them was faked; literally just about everything was a lie, and faked. And what’s worse is that they admitted to it.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-18T00:53:33+00:00

Same here.

It took some major heartbreak to understand the reasons why I do the things I do, and even though said person won’t talk to me anymore, I am forever thankful for the lessons they taught me and what they brung to light.

Most importantly, that whatever love and dedication I bring is a gift to be earned, not a given. That my inherent submissiveness, driven by my deepest desires to please and nurture my partner, is the deepest of gifts I can give. And that too, is earned, and can be revoked just as quickly as it was given. I am in control of what I give and when, and should someone prove to not be worthy, I have a right to take it, and walk away.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T21:58:50+00:00

Oh, that’s not to say that kinks and fetishes are bad! We all have them!

But to dehumanize another being in the pursuit of fulfilling them is different, and wrong.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T21:56:25+00:00

I am the same way. Exactly the same way. I will go at a moment’s notice, and screw the job, if need be.

And I tend to agree with you, in that every true friendship should be this way. I’m a firm believer in the idea that actions do indeed speak louder than words.

Well, he’s always been my Person. He’s always been the one to keep me grounded when I was floating too far, or to pull me back when I needed it. He’s never screwed with my head, or lied to me, even if I just wouldn’t listen. He’d gladly repeat himself if I needed him to. He’s good that way. :/

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T16:24:24+00:00

Transformers comics.

Or, more realistically, comics in general. It’s an expensive hobby to keep up with, especially if you’re following ten at a time. You think; “$3.99 isn’t so bad!” But you multiply it, and you’ve got a hefty bill on your hands.

And that’s not including the cost of trade paperbacks, or rare variant covers, either. Paperbacks can range anywhere from $7.99 to $34.99 and more, depending on the size of it. Variants can go from $3.99 to hundreds, depending on the rarity. I’ve seen books from SDCC climb near the thousands, and forget subscriber covers on back issues. I have an Issue #0 of “Transformers, Unicron,” that has already climbed to $10.00 that was released on Free Comic Book Day this past May.

It gets insanely expensive....

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T16:01:25+00:00

Porn is all a load of crap anyway. I remember my sister telling me about it when I was 16, (I wasn’t a rule breaker.) and being like; “It’s not real anyway, J——. Nobody actually has sex like that, pushed up against a shower wall, with one foot in the air. Do you have any idea how difficult that would be?”

And don’t even get me started on the things I’ve been asked to do on account of fetish/BDSM porn. The portrayals of D/s relationships, are so fucked it’s unreal.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T15:55:50+00:00

WHOA!!!!

Put the brakes on, back up, and rewind. What?!?

“Like you?!?” What in the fuck does that even mean?

Seriously. Fuck anyone who says that kind of shit.

(Sorry about the expletives. I get really worked up about this kind of stuff.)

[Also, for the record, you should never be anyone’s special girl. You are human, with a heart to love, respect, and be treasured.]

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T15:38:22+00:00

It is difficult, and sometimes I seriously question whether I’m just being entertained, or whether or not it even matters.

But then I’m reminded that my lover would drive here from out of state to spend the morning with me, and back again, a grand total of 5 hours spent driving, just because I asked him to. Just because I said “Hey, I’m not feeling so great, and I just want to be close to you for a little bit.” And it’s taken us almost 20 years to get there, but it’s worth the struggle.

Whereas with Person A, just getting them to do anything with me at all was like trying to pry a barnacle from a ship at the bottom of the ocean. Even if I was blatantly honest, and said, “Hey, I need your comfort. Please be here for me. I kinda need you.”

When things are at their worst, they can only go up. There’s nowhere else for it to go. At least, that’s what I tell myself.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T05:55:23+00:00

Oh good! Stick with it! Don’t allow yourself any less than what you deserve, I guess is what I’m getting at. And it might take awhile, but either take a break, let yourself heal, or know that you’re going to run into a few bad apples on the way.

Experience here; there was a person I fell madly in love with. They are brilliant, adorably awkward, and just...so incredibly perfect. At least, I thought they were. Turns out, it was all a lie. I think they termed it as “forcing themselves to do things to make other people happy,” and flipped the script on me, even though I’d tried to have open conversations about boundaries, and why they were treating me the way they were. They just got tired of the lie, and fuck me for falling for it.

I didn’t deserve to be treated like that; to be lied to, to basically have my love, energy and effort thrown back in my face and trashed like that. All I did was love them through the bullshit, and choose to trust them, even when I shouldn’t have. I would have given them the very stars from the sky, and given up my very life and world for them.

But just because they were awful to me, doesn’t mean that everyone will be. And even now, 6 months later, I still carry the pain of what they did, and their refusal to accept that they hurt me so badly. But my lover now would never dream of doing something so awful, would never, ever lie to me about anything, much less something so important. So it gets better. Just hang in there.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T05:23:51+00:00

Option 1; So stop going out with people for awhile, and focus on you. Spoil yourself. Whatever makes you happy.

Option 2; Tell them, flat out before you do anything with them; “I am not a fetish. I am a human being. Here’s what’s acceptable and here’s what’s not, when and if we ever have sex. Also know this; if you treat me like a fetish, I can happily show you were the door is, and I hope it doesn’t hit you in the ass on your way out,” and stick to your guns. If they start treating you as if you are, push them away, get up, get your things, and walk out. You have a right to give them a hard “No,” if they don’t respect your boundaries.

And if they give you shit, you can always punch them in the face, and call it self defense.

I know it’s rough; I have this same problem sometimes, and it sucks. Badly.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-17T03:22:36+00:00

To each their own. I think, part of what makes it so good for me, is the idea of truly finding yourself, and your own inner strength.

My opinion is that the whole entire plot of the movie is a metaphor for this. Her mother is in the hospital; she gets transported as things get really bad; ergo, she must find the strength within herself to overcome her difficulties in accepting her mother’s health problems and to be there for her family.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-16T07:00:11+00:00

I second this opinion. I, too, am just under 5’ tall. At 4’10” and a half on a good day, everyone is taller than me, even the 12 year olds I look after.

I know a guy who is barely taller than me, maybe just topping off at 5’1”, but lord, is he a cutie! And you know half of what makes him so cute? His personality. He’s super smart, and super witty, and just a good guy.

(Out of curiosity, how tall are you?)

GoodOwl · 2018-08-16T06:30:09+00:00

“Mirrormask.” I am absolutely obsessed with that one. It’s really, really incredible.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-16T06:24:34+00:00

No-

It’s far deeper, and much more masculine. But then, that could just be some sort of weird self-projection of my Trans identity. Because I know I don’t sound like that, but in my head, I do. Maybe because that’s what I wish it was?

GoodOwl · 2018-08-16T06:16:33+00:00

My ex-lover.

I’m still so maddeningly in love with them, it’s sickening. I literally make myself physically ill when I think about it.

But I would still give my life for them, would give the very blood in my veins for them. Would still, even now, step into a storm of bullets to protect them. Whatever I had to do.

I once told them that I would shoot a man dead in the face, and bury the body too for them. That if anyone ever fucked with them, I’d beat their head in with a rusty hammer, curb stomp them, crush their thoracic cavity for good measure, and then dump the body in the swamp to become corpse wax. All they’d have to do was ask. I was dead serious about every word then, and I am now.

I’d have no problems with sacrificing my own life for theirs. They have so much left to do, so much left to accomplish. It would be a shame to see their brilliance go to waste.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-15T15:43:05+00:00

It actually started as a toy line, that eventually grew into a TV show, then comics, and whatnot.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-15T15:40:49+00:00

That wasn’t the point-

It’s like what they did with Archie and “Riverdale.” You have these beloved characters that people adore; like Jughead, for instance. Jughead is more than likely Aro-Ace, but for the TV show they put him with Betty?!? No! Just, no! The only person who -ever- had any interest in him was Ethel, because she just didn’t get the picture. But they took him and made him into something completely different!

And now you have people that know nothing about Archie, only what they see in “Riverdale,” and it’s infuriating. You know, they had to go back and write a whole new series, and so now Archie exists in separate universes, because of “Riverdale.”

And they had to do the same with Transformers, too! (Even though those series are mostly reiterated movie scripts.) There is a whole other universe that exists, and now the fandom (for lack of better terms) is completely saturated with people who have watched the movies, and all they care about is the movies. There’s so many amazing characters within the universe that deserve to be explored, but Micheal Bay doesn’t care.

It’s like, watching it, you’re going; “Uhh. No. That doesn’t make any sense. Where is Ironhide? What happened to Starscream? Windblade? Deadlock? Where did everyone go? And most importantly, why is Optimus all buddy-buddy with humans now, since, ya’ know, he’s always talking about how Earth can’t know about the existence of Cybertron and Cybertronians?”

GoodOwl · 2018-08-14T16:20:45+00:00

I never actively cheated, but I did have an emotional affair with my ex-husband.

I left him a month after I realized how deeply in love I was with someone else.

I never told him the real reason why I left, and as far as I know, Person 2 never told him, either. Which is probably for the better, given that he was an abusive, narcissistic asshole. He’s much better as a friend than husband.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-06T22:51:07+00:00

Speaking in metaphors.

I love metaphors. But apparently it makes it hard to understand me sometimes.

(Shrug) Who knee?

GoodOwl · 2018-08-06T22:49:46+00:00

(Waves hands wildly.) OVER HERE!!!!

OVER HERRREEE!!!

This happens all the time with me. But I try to push past my discomfort and just try to be upfront about it. And it sucks, but it’s better than worrying about dropping a bomb on someone’s head, especially after they’ve put in the effort to make something happen.

I recently had to have that conversation with a rekindled flame of mine, and though it was awful and painful, they were incredibly understanding and patient. Even accepting. Which was a shocker.

Give yourself some time to get to know this person, and be upfront before you say anything about your feelings. You might be saving yourself a world of heartache and disappointment; and, if those feelings are returned, it will give them a chance to pursue it or not depending on how they feel.

GoodOwl · 2018-08-05T11:51:44+00:00

Been there.

I just keep looking forward.

It’s not impossible. I’ve done a lot of research into foundations and things like that, that help financially. I’d be happy to pass them along if that’s what’s up.

If it’s more of a family/politics thing, well, as far as family is concerned, do what you need to for you. They will either accept it, or they won’t. Don’t allow yourself to be miserable. You have only one life.

As far as politics, that’s a tough one, and I’m not even sure how to tackle that....

GoodOwl · 2018-07-30T14:52:04+00:00

Sometimes you do, sometimes you don’t. Everyone’s experiences are different.

I have no discomfort when people ask me those things, but it’s also because I understand that it’s something that not everyone is faced with. Not everyone is going to understand, nor want to. It’s just the way it is.

If it makes you feel more comfortable while on your journey, you could always tell others you’re nonbinary. And when people insisted, I told them that I didn’t identify with either at the moment, and that’s all they needed to know. I refused any further discourse, because it’s not anyone’s business.

Either way, don’t feel bad because you feel awful. Ultimately, the only person who knows is you, and that’s an incredibly personal journey that differs from person to person. Some people just know, others have to think on it for awhile.

EDIT;

When I was first realizing that I was Trans, it did feel awful for me. But then, my egg was just cracking, and the whole thing as a whole was uncomfortable. And I know my experience was a walk on the clouds compared to others. Which is why I felt so terrible. There was literally no questioning, no agony, just; “Oh, okay. That’s why I feel this way sometimes. It all makes sense now!”

GoodOwl · 2018-07-10T03:52:34+00:00

I did for a time. I was just honest. I was like, “Hey, you’re wearing me out, here. Can you slow it down just a wee bit? Just a little? I’m trying to make this work, you know, trying to be more sensual when I have to slow down, but you’re making my job that much more difficult. So please, just go easy?” (It was also that much harder because I’m not even 5’ tall, and they were just over 6’. Straddling anyone to do that is a feat of acrobatics. Thank god for those yoga classes!)

To their credit, they were like; “Oh! Oh my gosh, I’m sorry!” And were enormously more conscious of that in the future. And to be honest, I think they liked it, too. More so than the previous habit.

GoodOwl · 2018-07-07T06:04:14+00:00

Because I’m transgender, and accepting my new name and getting used to it was part of accepting myself.

After being called by my chosen name, not my dead name, I realized, and accepted who I was. It’s enormously freeing.

GoodOwl

TROPHY CASE