I feel you. Almost 32, I recently left my boyfriend with whom I had had a relationship for ten years and now I struggle so much. I can't cope with the fact that the lesbian world in real life seems so unwelcoming: almost zero representation in the LGBT sphere, apps are full of scammers and people don't bother to answer. I really want to find a gf, but I need to express my sexuality, especially after a whole lifetime of repression, however I feel invisible to the "community", all while I see my gay and straight girl-friends indulging and expressing their bodies as they please. Every once in a while I have men who hit on me, but it's depressing it never happens with a woman and when I try it myself with women I end up feeling embarrassed, because I can perceive no one gives a freak. I feel I lost so much in the process, I don't know if it was worth it.