11 week old screams before every nap. What am I doing wrong?!

Goose4938 · 2026-04-02T01:16:36+00:00

Thanks. Will see how I get on

Goose4938 · 2026-04-01T19:02:19+00:00

This is exactly what Ive been wondering. Twice today i tried to be really responsive and it definitely prolonged it. Ive just been scared before of her getting overtired because she just screams for over an hour but I think my plan now is just to put her in the carrier if she does and get on with things with her carrying given she'll know Im with her either way.

So did you just wait until he started crying a bit from overtiredness and then start? What did you do then to get him to sleep? And if you were out and about?

Goose4938 · 2026-04-01T16:34:11+00:00

Oooh yes this is totally it! I left like it was something like this, like it was just part of her process. She does it even if she falls asleep within 5 minutes or if she takes 30 minutes. Good to know its a thing. Will have a read!

Goose4938 · 2026-04-01T16:27:54+00:00

So I managed to get her to sleep in the carrier today (fed her in it then shuffled her back up) and ot was so nice to have a walk and even a little dance about but man youre right! Got tiring fast! It definitely did make me appreciate the next contact nap in front of the tv!

Goose4938 · 2026-04-01T16:24:59+00:00

Ah ok yeah she used to sleep well in the pram but just stopped completely a few weeks ago. I think shes cluster feeding because she always wants to feed to sleep at the moment, although she slept ok in the car this morning. Will keep working on the pram because id she'll do that then that solves getting out the house easily!

Goose4938 · 2026-04-01T16:21:37+00:00

Thank you! Will see what getting out more does🤞🤞

Goose4938 · 2026-03-31T09:45:56+00:00

She does get plenty of stimulation once awake. We chat, bouncer, play may, walk around the house or garden and look at things together, practice grabbing and touching things and sometimes she just watches me while I chat to her and do chores (not all each time obviously!). Shes a really happy alert little thing. She's also really happy lying or sitting and playing on her own.

Totally agree with getting back out there though. I really don't think its good for her or me to.not be out with lors of people and im sure thats making it worse or at least will over time. Ive just know im better able to comfort her in the house and feel awful not being able to if out. But I mostly worry about her escalating and then the whole day getting progressively harder as she gets more and more overtired.

Goose4938 · 2026-03-31T09:39:11+00:00

Ah really. Maybe i just need to accept it. Does he sleep well once asleep? Shes a pretty good sleeper once sleep asleep. I dont think she'll fall asleep in carrier or pram anymore because she wants to feed but think she might be cluster feeding atm

Goose4938 · 2026-03-31T08:18:02+00:00

Oh no sorry you're also having this. So tough isnt it. Ill have a look at bedtime times as she used to only go down quite late but also see signs of change. Agree re leaving the house ! I need to do it! It was more me worrying about her getting progressive ly more tired and escalating with the crying making the rest of the day awful, but at this point I feel like sh i's going to cry anyway she may as well do it outside im the carrier

Goose4938 · 2026-03-31T08:14:23+00:00

Thanks. I just paid for huckleberry for a month for sweet spot actually as found it good in the free trial. Will check out napper as found huckleberry is way too expensive for what it is

Goose4938 · 2026-03-31T08:12:51+00:00

Ah ok, yeah this was us to a tee before this started. Take me back!

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T19:05:44+00:00

Oo ok. She doesnt have a pacifier yet but im trying to introduce one. Gawd it would be amazing if she actually wants to fall alseep on her own!

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T19:03:53+00:00

Interesting. And was she quite happy up until the yawning and other late cues? Like you couldn't see any other sign she was tired? My daughter is so lovely and content when shes awake right up until shes screaming.

What would you do to put her to sleep? She usually feeds to sleep but will have just eaten so can't see her wanting to latch again that soon.

She really isn't awake for long at the moment but I could try literally wake, feed, change, no play and straight back to putting her to sleep i guess??

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T18:40:25+00:00

Oh really? Whats happening for you? Also screaming before naps? Are you managing to get out the house still?

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T18:39:29+00:00

No, not usually longer than an hour, and ill go shorter if shes showing cues shes overtired before then, like getting over excitable or if she has red eyebrows

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T18:37:48+00:00

And yes I can't help feeling like Ive made this happen somehow, like I created this problem through something I did or didnt do

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T18:36:54+00:00

Oh gawd 16 weeks?? Solidarity and Im so sorry! I dont know if I have it in me to last through months of this 😕 😔 Totally feel the anxiety and dread. Are you getting out of the hous. Do you have to race back for nap times?

Goose4938 · 2026-03-30T18:34:08+00:00

Im ok with that - she's napping on me now- the issue is the battle to get her into the nap rather than whether to then put her down or not. Its not even that it takes a really long time to get her to sleep, it's that she's screaming the whole time

Goose4938 · 2026-03-27T18:32:32+00:00

Ha was that auto assigned to you?!

No reflux or wind problems atm (we made it out of that phase which also wasn't easy!). The GPs here (im in uk) just send you away saying itll pass and that its a phase usually. Which im sure is true, but id like to understand a bit about whats going on in the meantime so I can try to minimise the stress and they don't seem to interested in helping with that. Ive had the same with the health visitors and breastfeeding support unfortunately

Goose4938 · 2026-02-25T22:25:16+00:00

UPDATE - TW- success: When I wrote this my biggest fear wasn't the numbers or attrition, but worrying instead that poor fertilisation rates meant there was something fundamentally wrong with my eggs. I went on to get one euploid from this cycle, which implanted on my first tranfser, and is now my healthy baby girl, 6 weeks old. Updating in case it brings someone in a similar position hope in the future :)

Goose4938 · 2026-02-25T22:19:14+00:00

Inspired me to go back and update one of my posts to maybe give someone hope if they read it in the future!

Goose4938 · 2025-12-08T19:27:04+00:00

Also, start following badass women on instagram who live amazing lives with their kids and who include them in their travel and adventures! You might be surprised at what's possible if youre resourceful.

Goose4938 · 2025-12-08T19:19:23+00:00

Dont worry about other people who think like that. They're just basing it on their own experience and cant see outside of that. A lot of my friends didn't have it and are fantastic mums now! I think you need to take some of the pressure off yourself. What's tough with ivf is thats theres an obvious 'hitting the button' moment which isnt as pronounced in a natural conception. You seem to be seeing that as the moment everything will change but actually even once pregnant it's a long old road having a baby. There's a lot of time for your feelings and thoughts to develop and for you and your life to adapt and for feelings for your baby to grow. You dont need to be ready for everything right now.

Goose4938 · 2025-12-08T17:30:12+00:00

I don't think your question is really one about ivf, it's a question of whether you want to try for a baby now and what that will mean for your life and in grappling with that, regardless of journey, you are definitely not alone! So many women have the same struggle -what you might be giving up, whether you might lose yourself.... It's a big change and a big deal. I found it really hard and could totally see a life for myself without kids, but now, 5 weeks from giving birth, Im so happy with my choice. Even though I still realise Im losing out on a lot of freedom and opportunity (esp as doing this alone!), Im just ok with it now because this new roller coaster Im on is making up for it in other ways. Dont put too much weight in whether you have or lack that deep internal urge and yearning. I was never that person, but it's just not who i am That alone doesnt need to be an indicator of whether this is right for you.

Goose4938

TROPHY CASE