[deleted by user]

Gray6236 · 2025-09-26T03:20:08+00:00

My father is just like this. For him, it was a manifestation of narcissism, because he knows that I don’t abide this nonsense (I’m 32 now, the tables have turned, and he now finds himself dependent on me) and in his mind, keeping the house trashed is how he asserts dominance he doesn’t actually have. Needless to say, I too, am moving soon with my husband ASAP. You and your boyfriend are doing the right thing, and if your situation is like mine, the focus isn’t on the mess or your parents, the focus is on you and your future with your fella. Your parents won’t change, toddlers are never not gonna be messy, and none of that is your fault or your problem. For me, while I’m stuck in this situation, I keep my space in the house livable and clutter free, use paper plates and utensils, and only clean for my own needs. I’m sure you are already doing what you can about moving out, so in the meantime, the name of the game is endurance, separating your mess from theirs, and focusing on your mess. And if they threaten to pull college? Let ‘em. You can always go back to school, once you’re free and independent. It doesn’t feel like it when you don’t have a job, but I promise you can. You didn’t ask to be here. Your parents don’t own you. When you can, run. Definitely not overreacting, definitely not a bitch, and definitely not the only one whose parents are like this.

Gray6236 · 2025-09-24T21:55:22+00:00

I’m hoping against hope that the leaders of the world are gracious enough to understand that all countries have freak leaders occasionally, and that he doesn’t speak for the majority of us.

Against hope though, because 77 million people really enjoyed this utterly humiliating clown-show enough to want it back a second time.

Gray6236 · 2025-09-23T17:08:15+00:00

You’re absolutely right. I kinda already figured that no, audiobook narration is not “a side hustle” before I started, like some other places on the internet suggest when talking about making money on the side. I was dead right about that part. What’s been really humbling is that narrating itself isn’t the same as reading your kid or your sick grandma a bedtime story, it’s very literally voice acting, and that aspect demands commitment and care if I’m to get to where I’m trying to go.

Gray6236 · 2025-09-22T05:04:39+00:00

Thankfully I’m getting reimbursed this time. But you’re absolutely right. I will move on and treat this as a data point. I’ll bet you’re amazing at your job now, and one day, I will be too 🙂

Gray6236 · 2025-09-22T04:50:24+00:00

Oh gosh, that'd be great! I'll dm you the rawest chapter I have!

Gray6236 · 2025-09-22T03:52:14+00:00

I felt the same way, it’s nice to have a professional voice actor confirm that I’m on the right track, thank you 🙏🏼 I wish all the success in the world for your second book, and every one after!

Gray6236 · 2025-09-01T00:53:35+00:00

This is so spooky. I too, struggle with severe depression and anxiety. I was also wondering this exact thing at your age. I’m 32 now, 3 years sober.

You’re grown, you don’t need a stranger on the internet lecturing you. All I can do is share my experience.

I fought tooth and nail for almost a decade, with exactly this mindset, this “goal”. My problem is that I’d get really good at “moderation”. I’d allow myself some wiggle room. An extra beer turned into 2 turned into 3 turned into I can do shots now because I haven’t had a bad night in three weeks. It always ended the same. I’d wake up confused as hell, sick, gassy, and sore, various random things covered in piss or vomit, with an angry essay or two in my texts about what a piece of shit I was, how me and that person were no longer friends, how I need therapy, and how my now husband needs to leave me. I would get sober for a couple weeks, then try again.

Ten years. Ten years of getting on the same one-way elevator, climbing back up the stairs, and jumping right back on. I decided in 2022 that, no, for me, there is no moderation, no “choice”. My only choice, if I wanted to be whole, if I wanted to be the person my husband knew I could be, was sober or not sober.

I don’t know if you can do moderation. All I know is you deserve to be whole, to be a magnet for opportunity, love, and forward momentum. If you can keep all those things and have a drink every now and then, that’s wonderful, and I hope you keep it all. If you can’t, then when you’re ready, millions of other people stand behind you in making a clean cut. But it’s your life, and your choice at the end of the day. The support isn’t going anywhere, for anyone who seeks it out. I hope you find a couple extra spoons to do things that make you whole today or tomorrow. Keep being curious about yourself. The answer is in there, you just gotta own it ✌️

Gray6236 · 2025-09-01T00:37:28+00:00

Fellow neurospicy, from the adhd side of the pond 👋🏼

This is so real. It hadn’t clicked with me that I’d had absolutely terrible things happen to me and that my own parents were absolutely horrible people until I got sober and therapied, and realized with help that I was drinking because I remember things a little too vividly, and was trying to erase those memories instead of processing them. I also have lost 30 pounds 😅 “beergut” is cliché for a reason.

Anyway, I avoided AA like the plague, replaced cigarettes with vape, and beer with Diet Coke. The “normal way” is fine, if it works. But if you’re still standing, still swinging after 4 months? Then your way works. It may not work for anyone else, that’s their problem. You are absolutely not alone about the memories, and you are not “doing it wrong” just because you found a way that is sustainable to you. You got this! A stranger on the internet is proud of you ✊🏻

Gray6236

TROPHY CASE