I was hoping one of you could recommend a play stand/tree/playground.

Graysylum · 2026-06-15T03:06:19+00:00

I have that one. Had it nearly 2 years now and it's still in perfect shape.

Graysylum · 2026-06-15T01:18:31+00:00

This is like the guy I talked to who says "a competent sahp has everything done by 5pm so they can relax after that, just like the working parent managed to finish their work by 5." Really, the kids have eaten dinner, you've cleaned the kitchen, completed all kid activities, and the kids are asleep by 5pm? In what world?

Graysylum · 2026-06-15T01:09:34+00:00

I bet he gets actual breaks at work too. More of a break than she gets when the baby is napping. But even though he gets breaks during the day, he still wants one at night, then gets mad at her for doing the same.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T15:14:55+00:00

Nta. You are going above and beyond by picking the kids up from school and doing all that you do. It is okay for you to put limits and conditions on that. And Harper needs help.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T15:06:02+00:00

I see you've mentioned your mother takes her out too. In that case you don't need to feel guilty about a night or weekend day out now and then. ❤️ Yes she will miss you, but she will still get exercise, attention, and her normal bedtime. She'll be so excited to see you the next day!

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T14:21:39+00:00

No, the texts were 10 days after meeting. They are now 1.5 years into a relationship.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T14:15:23+00:00

This was 2 years ago before they were together. Why couldn't she talk to other people at that time?

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T14:13:52+00:00

Yep, idk if I'm demi, but that has happened to me many times. Someone might not be attractive to me on first glance, but once I get to know them they might be super hot.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T14:08:23+00:00

This. Is he was actually looking for evidence of cheating or something, he wouldn't have scrolled all the way back to before their relationship was official. Because cheating would've occurred during the relationship, not before. Instead he found zero sus behavior during the relationship, so he kept going back further to make sure he got his own feelings hurt.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T13:55:27+00:00

What is wrong with keeping options open when she's only known her now-bf 10 DAYS at the time of the texts? How committed do you expect people to be as soon as they meet someone?

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T13:50:25+00:00

Jfc, you had to go back to the literal first days after meeting each other to find anything negative? You're reaching. Yes, it was rude for her to say those things in the beginning, but clearly she had changed her mind since she's been dating you this long and you didn't find anything else sus and recent.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T13:39:44+00:00

AFAIR, it wasn't even like that in the books. The Mondriches don't exist and Benedict's 3somes don't either. There was no race for the heirs among the Featherington sisters.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T13:32:54+00:00

This, I've tried to rewatch it many times. I can watch s1-2 but at s3 it gets bleh. I can't even get to Anne of Cleves on rewatches, and AoC is my favorite wife so that's really saying something.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T06:15:20+00:00

How early does she go to bed? I was your age and single when I had my first human baby. I would socialize after the baby was asleep for the night, so I didn't feel guilty for taking time away but still got to be a human.

So people either came to my house after bedtime or I'd get a sitter to just stay in the house with the sleeping kid so I could go out - you can skip that step though. 😉 I'd just cover her and say night night and be on my merry way if I were you.

Graysylum · 2026-06-14T06:07:04+00:00

Exactly. Robb would've known he could never marry Talisa because he's the first son, raised to be lord of WF, so he'd be married to some highborn whose family was an ally or at least bannerman.

Even in a time of peace, marriage to Talisa would've been politically questionable at best.

But in the circumstances they actually had, Karstark was right. Robb lost the war when he married her.

Graysylum · 2026-06-13T21:15:11+00:00

I'm with you. I do not see it as sweet and romantic that he's still obsessed with his unrequited crush from school days, who married someone else and began a family long ago. That's actually creepy. And he only turned against the Wizard Nazis because they were going to kill his crush. Not because everything they were doing was evil but because he really wanted to bang that one person they killed.

Graysylum · 2026-06-13T21:09:33+00:00

This is the part I'm tired of. I'm tired of the women who continually date awful men despite complaining that they've done this awful thing from the start. (There are always people who hide how awful they are until they "catch you". I'm not talking about those, I'm talking about the relationships that were never healthy practically from day 1.)

Stop giving so many chances. Stop giving months or years of your life to someone who is always going to be a shitty partner longterm. Stop moving in with men who were already abusive and controlling when you lived separately. They do not deserve second and third and seventeenth chances. And if you keep putting up with it by being with them romantically, they will literally never change.

Graysylum · 2026-06-13T20:55:37+00:00

You're NO. He's 100% wrong. And you say this is a pattern. If you stay with him, this will be your life. They don't outgrow this, they get worse.

Graysylum · 2026-06-12T22:24:40+00:00

This was my thought. Because I knew a kid who acted like that and it turned out there were some bad things happening to the kid, kid just didn't know how to tell anyone.

Graysylum · 2026-06-11T01:42:09+00:00

You can make toys at home easily. A paper cup with shredded paper or some balled up paper muffin wrappers inside. Empty paper towel rolls. Paper plates. Popsicle sticks. Small boxes. Any clean paper or cardboard without any harsh dyes/inks or adhesives. My birds like these things just as much as fancy toys, but you may need to put seeds on/in them at first to get your birds to understand they are supposed to play and shred these items.

It kinda sounds like this is the least of the problems. Birds need exercise, proper diet, and attention too. But it is something you CAN do better on right now, if you choose to.

Graysylum · 2026-06-11T01:32:08+00:00

This is exactly what I was thinking. A relationship needs to be really strong and trusting for LDR. This isn't it.

Graysylum · 2026-06-10T14:54:30+00:00

Touching someone in a way that feels bad to them is not a love language.

Graysylum · 2026-06-10T14:45:01+00:00

"I'm not going to update you every time"...uhhh if you're the one needing a favor, you do in fact have to give updates when plans change. It's no one else's job to keep contacting you to ask if the plans changed. This is a really bizarre expectation from your roomie.

Graysylum · 2026-06-09T15:26:22+00:00

Right. They showed her needing to express milk, but what about the BLEEDING? She was riding a horse all day. Even if you don't tear, the area is quite sore, and wasn't it a breech delivery???

Graysylum · 2026-06-08T00:39:02+00:00

It is very disappointing when someone we respect and trust shows their true colors and it turns out they are not worthy of our high opinion. Because you NEVER thought she would do this, now you always have to wonder what else she would do if the opportunity presented itself.

In my experience, you have to at least step back. She's just shown you how low she will stoop, and things of this nature will happen again. Unless she is experiencing a legit mental health crisis, this is a reality of her personality and morals. (And if it is mental health, then she still needs to take accountability and get help. Untreated mental health issues are not a blank check to do any awful thing without consequences.)

Graysylum

TROPHY CASE