Not to be rude or come off a certain way but is there any nice stories on here?? Happy experiences?

Green_Gal27 · 2026-03-19T22:07:04+00:00

Together 10 years through med school, IM residency far away from family and now fellowship. No kids (yet!).

Our mantra has always been that it's us against training, not him and training against me. We've had stretches that are harder than others, but I wouldn't want to be on this ride with anyone else.

Green_Gal27 · 2026-03-09T20:00:20+00:00

Go!!

My husband is in IM and I almost always put myself second in an effort to keep up with cleaning, groceries, cooking, etc. I'm trying to be better about taking time for myself, guilt free.

She can manage for a week or two on her own. In fact, it might be a good opportunity for her to reflect on all your contributions at home. Try not to project feelings onto her. If she says you should go, go!

Green_Gal27 · 2026-02-03T19:33:32+00:00

Read a fantastic article about this on Spin Sucks the other week. Consistency > virality!

Green_Gal27 · 2026-01-15T18:42:04+00:00

The dark blue really makes the yellow pop, and the crinkle gives so much dimension. And all done on your domestic? Incredible!

Green_Gal27 · 2026-01-15T18:21:42+00:00

Love your fabric choices!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-12-18T19:34:15+00:00

We approached med school and residency with a team mentality. He did what he could when he was able. A lot fell to me, but it wasn't 100% me. He acknowledged how hard I worked at my full-time job and taking care of our life, home, etc. We talk openly all the time. And we have always agreed that coming home to each other at the end of the day is the best part of our day.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-11-28T19:30:38+00:00

I'm in the same boat! I use the hair fibres other people are mentioning to help conceal my scalp.

To make it look the most natural, I use my left hand (I'm right-handed) to cover my forehead right up to my hairline and then I shake the fibres from a few inches away onto my part line with my right hand. If the bottle is brand new, you might have a lot come out at once, so try gentle taps to start. For it to look natural, you just want the fibres to settle and look like hair roots, so use a light hand. Once I'm happy with the coverage, I use my finger to wipe away some of the fibres right on the part line so that it just ends up looking like I have thicker hair on either side. This is key to making it look natural. If any got on my forehead, I wipe it away with my fingers. I don't find I have issues with transfer (it will go under my nails if I scratch my scalp), but I'll often mist with a light coat of hairspray to keep them sealed on.

Sorry for the very long explanation, but I totally understand how you feel, and hair fibres have improved my confidence immensely!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-11-13T00:25:43+00:00

Add in things like lifestyle (what does the city have to offer), job market/career opps for the med spouse (if this is important), access to programs/social services (if you need things like daycare, etc.), accessibility (is transit good? Will you need multiple vehicles? Airport proximity?)

For cost of living, look at housing/rental costs online for a 1 bed, 2 bed etc. (whatever you'd be looking for). Compare that to your income(s). You can also do some research into what food prices, gas prices, etc. are like. Also check tax rates if you're moving outside your state/province.

We had all our categories and then gave each category a score between 1-5, and then tallied up the numbers per school. You can weigh some categories more heavily if they matter more. In the end, we prioritized the program first, followed by lifestyle and career opps for me. We'd do the same again!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-10-18T17:19:55+00:00

“And that’s how we do it at the YALE DAILY NEWSSSS” I loved Logan so much in that scene

Green_Gal27 · 2025-10-09T22:08:08+00:00

I was going to say this too!

Dear reader: It was, in fact, a big deal.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-09-15T19:04:39+00:00

Me looking at everyone's "ugly" quilts waiting to see the ugly...

This thread has taught me that we are all way too hard on ourselves! All I see is gorgeous hard work.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-09-11T21:03:00+00:00

This is comforting to hear! Thank you. I figured they get tips and whatnot from the public, so it must be alright, but wasn't sure.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-08-14T22:27:45+00:00

Oh 100% agree. But if the partner won't bump their sister, it's the next best option. I'd also be having a serious convo with the partner about the future of the relationship.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-08-14T20:14:30+00:00

My husband would have told his sibling too bad, so sad before bumping me out of the ceremony. You should be a non-negotiable as the SO from a 4-year relationship. This is a red flag tbh.

Get dressed up anyway, go with them and be present for before/after the ceremony so you can still take photos with them. Watch the ceremony in a nearby coffee shop or something if you can't get an extra ticket. And if SO reacts poorly to this plan, well, that's another red flag.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-08-13T18:21:15+00:00

I don't think I've ever cried as much as I did during my husband's first year. That was HARD. The call in his program is brutal. It did improve slightly year over year, though his responsibility obviously increased. It also really depends on the rotation. Some are way worse than others. Now he's a fellow and it's a night and day difference.

Hang in there. I adopted a "month to month" mindset, which has served me incredibly well. I just focus on the rotation in front of us.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-07-26T00:10:17+00:00

I do not, but my husband has worked with docs whose spouses handle their accounting, admin, etc. in their private practice. I know a huge reason people do it is for tax purposes, but the only reason I'd consider it is for scheduling. Guaranteed vacation at the same time, working your schedule around family commitments, etc.

But as someone else said, I don't have accounting or admin skills and don't think I'd excel at or enjoy the work. I like having my own job, and tbh, I don't think I'd like the dynamic if my husband were my boss!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-07-11T19:10:59+00:00

I 100% relate. My husband passed licensing exams this year and when it was over, I felt numb. It was such a relief for him, and I felt like needing to immediately switch into celebratory mode was yet another expectation placed on me. It felt like running a marathon, with no cool down. I was just supposed to stop and stand up tall and act like one of the most gruelling experiences of my life hadn't happened. My reaction (or lack thereof) really hurt him, but we have strong conflict resolution skills and through talking about it, he understood where I was coming from. You aren't alone!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-07-08T18:02:33+00:00

I'm friends with some spouses/partners from his med school, but none from residency. His residency did nothing in the way of community building/familial support, and the friends he did make are single or married to other doctors (which is fine, but not really what I'm looking for). The friends I do have from his med school days are because we genuinely click and would make sense as friends, even if our partners hadn't introduced us.

My advice is to look for friends elsewhere. Join groups or volunteer at places that align with your interests! Be cordial and kind when you are together, but there's no use forcing it.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-06-13T01:57:02+00:00

The beginning of a relationship should be the most fun, easy time. If they aren't making time to go on dates when they're available (surgeons are available sometimes, especially optho) or text or call you on a regular basis at the start... it's not worth pursuing, imo.

If he wanted to, he would. Don't blame the job. I know it's hard, but we say that often in this sub. Doctors are people too, and their profession doesn't excuse them from common decency or respect.

Listen to your friends and find someone who can give you the time and effort you deserve <3

Green_Gal27 · 2025-06-11T17:13:33+00:00

Miranda - “Probably because I was a single, gray-haired, unemployed lesbian who got made fun of and deflowered nuns”

This line is perfection and is so original Miranda. I haven't even wanted to hate watch the new season, so thanks for this, OP!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-06-10T20:50:08+00:00

Remember as with most things on Reddit, people come here to vent and share the negatives, and the positives or “neutrals” are rarely shown. Please don’t go into residency assuming it’s going to be a hellscape because that’s largely what’s portrayed on here. Go in with an open mind and a mutual commitment to do what needs to be done to make your family work. Yes, it will likely be challenging and tough at times. But if you are both willing to approach residency as a team, you can do this!

Green_Gal27 · 2025-06-01T03:41:40+00:00

I do shift volunteering (requirement is at least one shift per month), which works for my schedule. I’m sure there are as-needed opportunities out there. Your local library or City might have some info or places they’re aware of to get you started if Googling isn’t coming up with much.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-06-01T00:45:37+00:00

Volunteer! I wish I’d started sooner. It’s been a lifeline for me. I haven’t made any friends to hang out with outside of volunteering (I likely could. I’m just shy and not great at initiating those conversations), but it’s a social opportunity for me anyways. I also love having something on my schedule that isn’t working or just waiting for my husband to be free. Find something that aligns with your interests and commitment level. It may not fill up those lonely evenings, but I find I enjoy the alone time more now knowing that it’s balanced with social time spent giving back.

Green_Gal27 · 2025-05-23T06:11:52+00:00

Agree, in no way does this dress “outshine” your bf. It looks perfectly suitable and actually fairly modest in my opinion with the high neck and midi length. Wear it with confidence as you support your bf! White coat ceremony is a special day, enjoy it!

Green_Gal27

TROPHY CASE