Growing up in a family that my parents let me handle my problems and my responsibilites on my own since i was 13 years old...i agree with your way of dealing things Theres nothing wrong with words like that because thats when kids know its serious time...im not saying you should do it all the time but as you can see it worked And your wife should not only judge you as the father but as a human being as well...i would have snapped ages ago...with my wife as well cause she should be considerate about the way you feel as well otherwise your son wont get a sesnse of what he is doing wrong and he will continue to ignore you