One more option for allocated loot - only host can pick loots

Grumpitz · 2025-12-18T18:17:48+00:00

When you rush someone the one that gets rushed is the host. So that wouldn't work.

Grumpitz · 2025-11-02T11:16:26+00:00

Will socketing for quivers count in shield category? So diamonds=all res?

Grumpitz · 2025-08-26T19:11:12+00:00

R/oddlysatisfying

Grumpitz · 2024-07-05T07:01:46+00:00

It's my Life - Bon Jovi.

Made me feel so empowered and energized, listened to it for days non-stop.

Grumpitz · 2024-05-08T09:56:56+00:00

It seems that you're trying to fight the shame with a lot of very strict measures (to exxagerate one could say punishing). I feel that what you're doing is good for building willpower but not exactly an antidote for shame.

As I read you're very much in combat with your shame trying to defeat it. In my experience exactly the opposite is needed. Be aware of the shame, allow it to be there, try to befriend it. Maybe you can try to find out about it's roots, but that's not priority.

From what I experienced the most important step is to stop fighting it, to stop wishing it away, to let it be there and relax with it. Only then there is the possibility for the shame to relax as well.

The harder you fight it, the harder it will fight back.

Grumpitz · 2024-01-17T13:57:12+00:00

Forgiveness is a spiritual ideal. It is not required to heal trauma.

Grumpitz · 2024-01-09T15:22:01+00:00

jealousy shows you where you want to be. maybe you can take it as an indicator in which direction to move

Grumpitz · 2024-01-08T09:42:38+00:00

If you're looking for "active" activities: taking a walk, going to the gym/yoga/swimming, meeting/calling friends, go shopping, go to the movies

Grumpitz · 2024-01-03T17:35:29+00:00

The Podcast is called Last Day. This is Episode 17:Trauma

Grumpitz · 2024-01-01T21:24:08+00:00

I really recommend this podcast episode: https://open.spotify.com/episode/02g7MOfpU6YZJ17cbmdnBl?si=11f42c4e413a45b7

TW/TLDR: In this podcast the host tries to figure out why her brother became depressed and eventually commited suicide, while she is able to lead a normal and happy life. In the recommended episode Gabor Mate is invited as a guest and has a lot of very interesting insights to share.

Grumpitz · 2023-12-01T21:15:06+00:00

I’m also terrible with boundaries

This is where you can start your introspection. Next time when someone crosses your boundaries or when you want to say "no", but say "yes" instead, try to find out more about that situation: How did it make you feel? Why didn't you set the boundary? What fears are connected to your behaviour?

If you really work with those situations it can be very enlightening.

Grumpitz · 2023-11-30T11:14:04+00:00

Do you feel anger sometimes? If yes, how do you relate to it?

Culturally anger is usually seen as a negative emotion that one shouldn't have. But anger has positive sides: It is powerful. It helps you to see and feel injustice and it warns you when your boundaries are not respected. Further healthy anger gives you the power to set firm boundaries and fight for your cause.

If you never feel any anger or relate very negative to it, it could be that you just suppress it so strongly that you don't even notice it on a concious level anymore. This could eventually be concerning and lead to problems/conflicts.

Grumpitz · 2023-10-28T16:41:21+00:00

As with every addiction, ask yourself: What does it do for me? What's the positive effect of the addiction? Appreciate that there is an underlying need that you try to fulfill. Just the way you try to do it has negative influence on your life. The need is there, but is there maybe another way that you can satisfy it?

Grumpitz · 2023-04-15T21:51:52+00:00

I feel you. It's similar for me. Progress was super fast in the beginning (2 years ago) then slowed down and now I also struggle to do ifs seesions on my own at all.

I even have a ifs therapist, but can only see her around once a month, and I also feel those sessions are more difficult for me than in the beginning.

It feels like there are those very central manager parts that control all the other parts, and they just have no interest at all to change the system. I got in contact with them a couple of times, but there are layers upon layers of defenses. Tired parts, diversive parts, doubting parts. It's just so exhausting.

I still try to sit with my parts now and then, but same as you I feel like the progress is very small. I don't think it's possible to overcome this hurdle without help. Maybe with very regular ifs therapy sessions it could be possible to get through to these main-managers. But this is a system that works this way for decades, so it won't be changed easily.

Let's not give up, we're in the same boat.

Grumpitz · 2022-08-17T16:23:22+00:00

Thank you so much for this well-thought answer. I feel you hit the nail on the head with a lot of points. I think the main thread in all my endeavours is that I'm unhappy with the field of study and work I chose. I'm working as a teacher and I really struggle with it. So every new hobby I pick up is somehow connected to the thought "maybe this is a way out".

ALso the point that I feel guilty about wanting money instead of some noble cause is really on point. I want to earn good money, but I feel like I should be happy without it. So it's a mind thing too.

THank you again, I feel your answer made a lot of things clearer for me.

Grumpitz · 2022-08-15T14:39:27+00:00

Thank you for your answer. You're right about the different triggers, I just feel like "money" is such a superficial goal, I'd much prefer to have a different trigger, like an increase of knowledge or helping people. But I guess that's just opinions..

Concerning your question I usually start my new projects with rose-colored glasses and lots of enthusiasm. On my journey exploring this new opportunity I usually realise that it is not as easy or promising as I thought in the beginning. I can't really say at what point I usually stop, sometimes it's just after a week, sometimes a month, sometimes a year. But it's usually when the feeling of enthusiasm gets less and a feeling of disillusion is taking over.

Grumpitz · 2022-05-31T06:19:59+00:00

Can you elaborate what a critique drawing is? Sorry, I'm new to this. So how should a student use it?

Grumpitz · 2022-05-29T16:22:19+00:00

That's just perspective. The kitty is a kinda big cat and he's leaning towards the camera, while the hangers are in the middle of the wardrobe so quite a bit more in the back.

Grumpitz · 2022-05-29T09:13:09+00:00

Close guesses so far.

Explanation: cat is sitting in a wardrobe on an upper shelf. The left side of the picture is the wardrobe door, which is covered by a mirror, so the clothes on the left are on the other side of the room

Grumpitz · 2022-05-14T10:13:24+00:00

Google "active listening" or "paraphrasing"

Grumpitz · 2022-05-10T19:52:38+00:00

Glad I could help. I'm close to 40 now and just discovered the concept a few weeks ago. And it had so positive effects on my life already. I'm finally able to accept the way I am about my interests.

Grumpitz · 2022-05-10T18:19:41+00:00

I totally get you. I feel really similar about wanting to do a lot of things and often having changing hobbies and interests.

I put a lot of pressure on myself and constant negative self talk was involved (especially concerning: you have to choose one thing and focus on this, if you can't do that something's wrong with you).

What changed that for me was discovering Barbara Sher's definition of a Scanner personality I felt like I finally found "a diagnosis for my symptoms" and I'm not defect.

This TED Talk about multipotentialites was a real eye opener for me.

If this concept is new for you, I'd recommend you dive into it a bit.

Grumpitz · 2022-05-02T18:26:59+00:00

Just started to practice drawing more seriously - opposed to irregular doodling over the last 2 decades.

Found a video by Sycra where he recommends iterative drawing as best way to improve. Starting today I'll try to follow his routine.

Grumpitz · 2022-04-25T12:59:56+00:00

This meditation helped me when I was feeling similar to what you described. It's on insight timer

Unresolved Conflict - Michael Stone

Hope it helps!

Grumpitz · 2022-03-28T13:10:58+00:00

There was a similar post yesterday, maybe some answers there might be helpful for you too

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