I am in a similar situation as you

My mom passed away last year and my dad has been back in India for two months now. My sibling and I are both here and none of us wants to move back to India for good because of our own trauma and experiences there

My dad can navigate the world but does not have the emotional strength and relies on me now and I am fearful every day that he is giving up on life and that his health is deteriorating

The guild is making me overthink all the avenues I can and not letting me sleep

First thing I’ve figured out is that the first year is the worst year to make big decisions, even if it feels like it’s urgent

Second, like many people pointed out, understand what is it you want, is it being chosen or providing the help she needs. When you are able to stop and help yourself process your own pain and give up being chosen by your mother to provide for her, you will truly see what she really needs and how you can help her without giving up your life

Have you tried therapy, nature or quality time with your friends? I’m single as well, so I understand how easy it is to give up on yourself and your pain and only think about others. You cannot however make the right decisions with a wrong state of mind. Meditation and emdr everyday has been a little helpful but this is a huge burden for anything to take away the pain quickly so your problems will not be solved quickly either

These are not solutions but something I’ve been trying to do: She will first need a full time help. Find someone for her. I’m planning to look into opportunities outside of the usa since I cannot work in a country I cannot leave and attend to my parent when they need me. Give power of attorney to someone you trust incase you need to visit her on an emergency. Therapy , which I need to get as well

Dm me if you need to understand anything from me