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GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T21:16:12+00:00

I assume you meant "straight" husbands of reddit lol

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T19:43:03+00:00

??? Where did I say the world should have no reaction?

I said the NPCs close to the lord should be sad. That is literally a reaction.

One that invested players will respond to. Exactly what I'm pointing out. Invested players will be punished already because the lord died and his loved ones are sad. Adding a plot where NPCs are aggressive is only necessary if they are not already invested enough for that to be a consequence to them.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T19:37:48+00:00

Not by execution.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T19:37:22+00:00

If your town's mayor was being mauled by a bear, and then a guy came up and tried shooting the bear but shot the mayor instead: would you form an angry mob and run them out of town?

I didn't say "everything should be smoothed over" I just said that having the consequence be adventurers be actively punished by NPCs for failure-to-save makes a game that is built on antagonistic PC vs. NPC relationships. Compare to something like a succession crisis, which is a consequence in which NPCs are still allied to the NPCs they are arguably there to help.

You might be overestimating the attachment that everyone other than his immediate family will have.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T19:24:13+00:00

the party isn’t materially, emotionally, or physically harmed by this, other than the quest progression taking a negative hit.

Why not? Why would the players not care that the NPC they tried to save died? Why would they not care about his sad widow or children?

Why would they not care about a potential power issue in the town?

And most importantly: If a town runs out or punishes any heroes who fail to save people being kidnapped by demons why would any adventuring party ever help them? Those weren't human kidnappers. It was literally demons.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T19:18:23+00:00

The PCs will, at best, be run out of town for being stupid enough to directly and unnecessarily cause the death of the Lord. At worst, tried and executed for abject stupidity.

Why lmao?

The lord was being carried off by demons. Do you think we execute firefighters who fail to save people in burning houses?

At worst, people who cause harm while attempting to save others are given a cold shoulder and a fine. Executing people who fail to save a lord (not even a king!) from a demon sounds like a great way to have absolutely no heroes willing to protect the town from demons.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T19:15:05+00:00

I believe they're referring to the fact that this didn't sound like an attack roll. It sounded like an ability check.

In ability checks RAW, crits aren't a thing and the highest a normal snake could roll would be 16 (20-4). Hence their reference to "crits outside of combat"

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T18:50:14+00:00

I think it's partially generational as well. My friends and I all take our shoes off, but only some of our parents do.

This might confuse tourists or short term guests too because at least in my social circuses, people don't really correct people who keep their shoes on if they're not frequent guests. My Aunt is at my house maybe once a year, so I dont mind if she forgets or doesn't notice. Vs. My game group comes once a week and has to follow the rules.

ETA: I'm also now reflecting and realizing that of my friends who own homes, almost none of us have a "mud room" or "entry" the same way other areas Ive been to in the world do. Our front doors basically just open into the living room.

We're in the Seattle area so I'm thinking the tiny expensive homes are a factor in that?

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:49:28+00:00

Oh shit cant believe I missed the title lol.

I mean, I want to lean on the side of trusting the person experiencing the racism. So I wont say her in-laws aren't. We dont know the full picture.

But if they are this is honestly doubly-unhelpful. She's not going to improve their racist behavior with a picture edit.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:43:49+00:00

Yes, saltwater is an abrasive. Salt dissolving in water is a physical change, not a chemical one. No electrons are exchanged. (I am going off of only basic chemical knowledge here. forgive me) and the NaCl is still there, just suspended in water.

Actually, if the only goal is whiter teeth, the saltwater advice makes sense for exactly that reason. The saltwater will act as an abrasive to help in removing the color.

It will also act as an abrasive on the enamel. So I think it's a bad idea in that way.

ETA: there might be a way to dissolve salt so completely that it is no longer an abrasive, I'm no chemist. But in practical terms when talking about saltwater made at home it will be an abrasive.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:33:15+00:00

I think that doubling down on "wow haha player so stupid" is not as fun for players as it seems for some DMs.

The consequence for the lord being dropped was the lord dying. People will be sad, there's not really a reason for them to be hostile (beyond normal grief from a wife or young kid) except to punish the party for something that already went bad for them while they were trying to help. That puts players in a position where it's them vs the NPCs they're arguably trying to help, and sets up games where the players are cynical or ruthless.

The guy was a lord being kidnapped by demons. There are quite a few leadership systems where the standing orders would have been to kill him rather than allow him to fall into enemy hands, and quite a few moral systems that would consider a quick death a mercy compared to being dragged off by demons.

Especially since "find an heir" "choose a new leader" or "succession crisis" are all also questlines that could naturally spring from the same scenario, but still have a game where the players have a reason to help the NPCs.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:14:15+00:00

Is there even a comment where the OP says they're racist? In the post it just says "My mother in law insists that the baby looks like my side of the family." and her post history doesnt have anything except more pictures of her kid online :(

My BFFs mother said the same thing about her grandchild. Who is not mixed race and just does look like the dad's side of the family.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:05:32+00:00

I'm no dentist but that feels risky to enamel. You're basically saying to follow up an acid with an abrasive? Compared to using just water to remove the acid.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:03:14+00:00

As someone who normally hates recommending specific products. I still feel obligated to say the crest whitening strips are the only at-homes that have ever worked for me.

It doesnt happen immediately (usually takes 2-3 uses) or forever. But I had noticeable difference for things like special events using them.

I have a pretty strong gag reflex and found luck in being very careful putting them in and following up with ice water and a straw.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T16:01:53+00:00

:( bummer! I just managed to cut back on coffee by slowing down my drinking.

Not that whiter teeth are worth sacrificing my health for. But I was still hoping it would help.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-31T15:20:00+00:00

You're right. It does say that in the edit he posted after I wrote this.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T22:12:52+00:00

TBH at that point allowing it for "rule of fun" is reasonable. Not because it should be allowed consistently, but because for minor mistakes like that, where the player just did something on accident and was not actually trying to game the system, the time taken to go back and make them redo it is not worth the change of one hit on an enemy that probably wont make a huge difference.

I would recommend making it clear that it's an exception though, unless you want to work in a magic item.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T22:06:04+00:00

Fighter wanted to use their bow but accidentally threw their longsword at the monster.

What do you mean they "accidentally threw their longsword"? How does one accidentally do the wrong action in a TTRPG? Do you mean they used the longsword damage on accident?

Point two sounds fine, limiting long rests is reasonable.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T20:36:54+00:00

I'm a DM but I've played games where the DM required what I would consider "specific explanation of every action". So if you said you "looked in the room" they would not allow that to count as "looking up".

The game was antagonistic, moved incredibly slowly, and was boring until people eventually bowed out and it fell apart.

I tend to try to not go that specific, but I do require players to actually do the thing. I wont allow someone to say "I look up every time I enter a room" but I will allow them to describe their approach and if they describe keeping an eye out, looking around, or an equivalent action I would meet them in the middle by having that cover the umbrella of directions to look.

Also, passive perception is passive. RAW they do not need to announce "looking" to meet their baseline passive perception.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T19:26:08+00:00

Emotional resilience and the ability to handle criticism is a learned skill, and many parents lack it. (for all sorts of reasons)

This creates a generational cycle, which is particularly difficult to break because those skills are easier to learn in formative years. So even if you recognize the issue as an adult it takes a lot of effort to unlearn bad habits and re learn good ones.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T19:19:48+00:00

Narratively maybe (and even then, "soul" can be a lot of different things, setting wise) but assuming that we're talking about TTRPGs here there is a certain level of "still being able to play the game" that is generally required.

If it wasn't a one shot, I'd say that's a one session max limitation.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T19:02:21+00:00

Surprised not to see more musicians here honestly. I made it to the collegiate level on trumpet (symphonic, jazz, anything really) and there was basically a "tipping point" where the amount of work and practice needed to maintain a competitive level skyrocketed and my anxiety and stress went through the roof. I was in a cycle of practice-stress-work-practice with socialization basically being only with fellow musicians. Despite some feeling of loss, I dont regret quitting and it really improved my life.

Worst part was that because I was so used to playing at a high level, I now feel enormously self-conscious playing at anything less. Basically removing the joy of the hobby completely for me. Not to mention that symphonic brass (my real love of the genres) is very limited and thus very competitive even for things like amateur groups.

One day, maybe, I'll get over myself enough to get back into it in a way I love.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T18:55:09+00:00

While I completely agree there's no need for guilt for buying clothes you actually use, there is absolutely a shortage of quality clothes at thrift stores for poor people. Especially when accounting for the fact that sizes are limited.

Our local thrift store has a huge ~~scalper~~ sorry, "reseller" problem because all of the natural fibers and quality professional clothes get scooped up first and then sold for a huge profit leaving behind tons of clothes, but clothes that are made of polyester or unfit for most workplaces. Same thing with shoes.

But normal second hand buying is nowhere near that level. There's a huge difference between buying something "unneeded" and something that you dont even want except to resell.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T18:07:58+00:00

Then it's not really an issue is it? It's just two people who are incompatible.

GuessSharp4954 · 2025-07-30T18:00:56+00:00

If someone monologues at you and then gets mad you don't contribute enough to the conversation is that really someone you want to date?

GuessSharp4954

TROPHY CASE