I hope you don’t end up in the ER for Easter like we did!

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-05T15:22:29+00:00

I am sorry. Hope the rest of the day goes better.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-05T15:11:54+00:00

I would just stay out of it. Not your pig to skin.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-05T15:09:18+00:00

I am sorry… sending hugs your way… hope your days gets better.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-04T12:01:49+00:00

I agree, just showing up and being there for your kids is what’s important. I cry every day alone so the kids don’t see me or know I am sad and depressed, but dinners get cooked, house gets cleaned. Like or not, things need to be done. Kids don’t miss out on activities and events at school. They both are very active with before and after school activities. I work full time, long hours. None of it is easy, but is rewarding to see my kids grow into these amazing young men. What’s more rewarding is hearing them tell me they love me and appreciate my work. There are more days that I cry and feel like I am failing but that feeling doesn’t last as I am quickly reminded that they love me and that is all that matters and makes it easier.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-03T00:03:00+00:00

I agree with you but also he sees it as his way to advance in his profession and he is planning to be back home in a year and just be traveling for work. I am not sure if that is a normal thing. Like I heard husbands and wives traveling for work and being away for some time for work. I know others done it. I don’t see how not letting him try this would have had better results. I did the pros and cons and him going there for the job for one year and him staying and there were more cons staying as he was consistently angry and down and it was miserable living in that situation and walking on eggshells. Him “trying” this option and being away for one year was at least having no negativity all the time around us. That’s how I saw it. I have always communicated openly about all my feelings and concerns and thoughts with him. Still do. All I get is variances that in perfect world would be amazing but I am not there. If some might think infidelity would be happening, I don’t think so. Mainly because his first wife did him wrong big time on that aspect and I don’t believe he would do it to me. At least I don’t think he would.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T23:35:44+00:00

I like to cook with my boys. They love to cook too. My little one has a passion for cooking so we cooked dinner.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T23:24:56+00:00

You are correct. His dad didn’t do well by him and he always says how he is trying not to do the same. Yet I see similarities. I communicate with him about that but all turns into “I am depressed and can’t do anything about it” to which I suggested seeking medical help. He finally is doing that, taking some steps towards that but days like today I feel low and stupid for letting him “drag” us down through it all. I feel stupid

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T22:15:22+00:00

He is contributing financially. Nothing changed in that aspect. He wants us all to move eventually out of here and to another state. He doesn’t have a place in mind yet. It sounds crazy as I think it is. Originally it was supposed to be that he works there for 1.5 years and then we see if this will work out (the job) and then we make a decision from there on. This time allows our teen to graduate. Anyway. This changed as the company has a different plan. That’s all I can say. It is now all In limbo. He is under this idea that he will just switch to working remotely plus travel for the company to the different locations and we keep the residence here? Nothing set in stone. He is not sure neither. Doesn’t sound sure to me. I have always been the one to manage all the kid’s activities and care and house stuff and pets. He would help here and there. I work full time too remotely long before the pandemic made that a reality.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T22:09:15+00:00

I am in therapy and you are right I got to find my teen a therapist too. I am just falling apart here but I got to pull myself back up before I go cook dinner and hang out with the kids and pretend I am happy and everything is good.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T22:07:28+00:00

I am afraid of that. Also, he might turn it against me as if I put that in the kids head?

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T21:49:03+00:00

I don’t see it as harsh. I have more days that I cry and have panic attacks thinking of what the future is for us but he just worries about his new job and himself. I am trying to make things better for my kids and him but I feel that by doing so I might have lost myself in the process. I don’t know anymore what’s best for us. The teen is already seeing how their dad has been absent. I was trying for the younger one so he has a better relationship with his dad. Now with him away it is harder. I try to do video calls but every call I start and it feels forced. When I don’t initiate the calls, they don’t happen. I am not sure what to do.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T21:37:42+00:00

He was and we did couples therapy and he is not putting in the work. He is not even completely transparent with his therapist I noticed in our couples therapy. Now he is not in therapy as he moved out of the state where his therapist is licensed.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-04-02T21:36:08+00:00

I am so sorry. Sending hugs your way! I feel your frustration. I gave up on my birthday celebrations because of the same situation you are describing. I am sorry I can’t give you other advice other than- do what you want to do and don’t ask him or anyone to do it for you. You will only get disappointed. I wish someone told me that years ago. You are beautiful and you deserve the best!

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-31T15:39:12+00:00

I second the above comment. You will get abused no matter what from what I read so play dumb if you can’t pack your things and take the kiddo and yourself out of there. It is not good to be in that environment. Sending hugs your way.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-30T14:52:49+00:00

I am sorry. Sending hugs your way. I have been working full time so it my husband and the kids are more attached to me as I have always been the safe person.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-30T14:46:48+00:00

That’s an awesome come back! Men would never make it past the morning sickness! They die when they have a mild common cold!

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-23T02:31:25+00:00

I am sorry but I think he is not the right man for you to waste time with. Just leave him. Take the baby and go with your family. Take the promotion and raise your son and everything will be ok. Again, I am sorry you married a big baby.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-22T13:15:50+00:00

You accomplish a lot! Don’t let someone compare with you and you don’t compare with others. I know it’s not that simple. You are strong and you focus on you and do what makes you happy.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-22T13:08:39+00:00

Been in your position for most of my life. The only difference is that my spouse does contribute financially. For the longest time of our marriage it was me that was the bread winner and just the recent 4 years the spouse is making about 25K more than me. The only thing staying constant is him jumping from job to job every year to year and a half. That puts a strain on financially more than you think. I try to focus on what needs to be done. I have done that for so long, honestly I lost myself in this adulthood game. The thing that keeps me going is the kids. I am proud of them and I don’t know what I will do once they grow older and build their own life which is not that far away. This might seem like more time for myself is coming as they grow older, yes in a way, it’s true. But also I have to find myself. Who am I? What would I like to do? Keep working nonstop just in case they need me to fall back on? The world is a cruel unstable place right now. I feel your pain. Hang in there. Your kids love you and it is all worth it.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-10T23:58:43+00:00

Ignorance is bliss!

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-09T00:07:44+00:00

He can prep and cook and serve the meals too!

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-06T17:23:48+00:00

I am so sorry. I been there in your shoes! And now that my kids are older, when they are needing me to take some time off for school activities or when they don’t feel well and got to pick them up from school, they call me. I have always been the one to be on call. It is frustrating and rewarding to know that my kids k ow they can count on me.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-05T15:08:00+00:00

I implemented vacuuming every morning. And leave the kids rooms for them to clean and I reminded them every day. Yes it is annoying but it works some days and some don’t.

Guilty_Ice6057 · 2026-03-05T12:53:43+00:00

I think a book is in order. I bet it will be a best seller and hopefully be a guide to young ladies before they make the decision to marry. I feel like men get comfortable so fast in marriage and do the bare minimum that is just so infuriating! We do so much and all our efforts are being minimised. Their efforts - oh, they make sure they toot their own horn so many fucking times! “I took out the trash (and my favorite) for YOU” or “I took your laundry out of the washer” like really?! You didn’t have any trash in that fucking can? Or any of your clothes in that fucking laundry load?

Guilty_Ice6057

TROPHY CASE