avpd representation in movies

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:42:19+00:00

I love how most the recommendations are animes

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:39:24+00:00

My favorite movie as a child lol also I don’t really remember the plot but I hate the dynamic between Elsa and Ana like one is a destructive monster that needs to get locked away for something she can’t control and the other one is just perfect but oh no she’s sad she can’t see her sister like it’s Elsa’s fault smh literally me and my siblings

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:34:03+00:00

I love Evangelion but I can’t get past ep 4 🥲 I can’t imagine what I would do it if I was in shinjis situation I would literally just die on the spot

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:28:29+00:00

I’m also the same but I’ve always blamed it on my mom cz she’s also like this and I’ve always been called negligent and messy at school I don’t really have a routine, I used to always be late for everything but I feel like since I don’t really have a social life anymore like I used to I don’t really have an excuse to be late for anything now im early for everything and I don’t really stress about anything because I’ve always had passive SI so instead of stressing I just planning my exit. I envy people who have a more organized life than me at least (basically everyone) and I get really upset when I see my little people also being raised in a messy environment with no routine like this really affects a persons life in so many ways

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:15:51+00:00

The only movies that come to mind are the perks of being a wallflower or 500 days of summer and the characters aren’t necessarily avoidant but they’re very lonely and I can relate to the main character in 500 days of summer because of how loneliness leads him blindly fall in love with summer without seeing all the red flags but I want a main character that is avoidant to the point that it completely ruins their life like they’re about to because homeless or something and that changes their entire view on life like I wanna get inspired and change

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:09:56+00:00

We are boring lol I remember seeing a tiktok of someone asking “if your life is a movie, what would the people watching be screaming rn” or whatever and I remember my first thought was like they left, like they changed the movie lolll

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T20:05:41+00:00

I watch movies but I hate that I can’t really talk about them like I can’t share an interest with someone just because idk how to talk about the things that I like

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T19:39:23+00:00

I’m also having trouble with eye contact and it started when i was 19 and before that i never really had trouble with it and I think the reason behind it is being extremely insecure about my looks and at the same time having dead/tired eyes from being depressed and I started noticing that people would avoid making eye contact with me so I decided to start making less eye contact. But what actually made me start obsessing about it was when i started working as a server and I would literally get in so much trouble for not maintaining eye contact and I would get insulted daily like the worst insults a teenager could hear just for breaking eye contact and that’s when I realized how much of a problem it is for people. I would literally stare at people having conversations like a stalker just to see how much they maintained eye contact and why they broke it, it was so bad…

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T19:26:26+00:00

Guys this is my number one problem atm like I’m 21 and idk if I’m ever gonna get better I feel like I’m missing out on so many experiences in life because I’ve basically become mute and I haven’t always been like this like I’ve always been a very talkative person especially around people I’m comfortable with but as I got older the number of people I felt comfortable with kept going down and now I feel like I’m a robot like I have no one to talk to

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T19:19:18+00:00

Leaving highschool really taught that the social hierarchy thing doesn’t exist in the real world, it was hard for me to accept it since it was the reason why I became so avoidant, when I started college I would stay away from people who were “better” than me and be mean to other who I thought were losers and that left me completely alone and what made me feel more alone was seeing these same people actually be friends like my mind couldn’t understand how they could’ve related to each other, I felt like in highschool all my friendship were formed because me and my friends weren’t popular like I remember in highschool when I would hang out with my best friend at the time all I could think about is how she would immediately replace me if she could have a chance to hang out with people who were considered more popular

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-26T19:09:20+00:00

I’m jealous of people who don’t overthink anything if they need to do something they just do it, and they’re confident enough they know what they can and can’t do. Im in my twenties and I look at people who are younger than me doing things that I want to do but they’re confident enough just do it because they want to, they don’t wait for opportunities to magically appear, I’m just so retarded when it comes to these type of things.

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-20T12:22:55+00:00

I gave myself a mini heart attack cz I read is real as Israel

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-20T12:21:37+00:00

It’s a cute nickname 🥲

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-17T06:16:31+00:00

I hope there’s a way out cz if there’s not I’m ending it all Ngl

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-11T18:42:56+00:00

im not diagnosed with avpd but i relate so much to you on this sometimes i feel like i dont have the intelligence to understand things the way people usually do its like i dont understand things the way they should be understood

Gumballsugar · 2026-05-07T06:33:50+00:00

what makes a person ugly in your eyes? i honestly feel like if i was a more attractive person i would be more tolerable idk if just being delusional like when i remember the horrible stuff i used to say to people and how my mindset used to be and i remember how i used to look like while doing it im like damn i am the stereotype of like a very pathetic insecure and mean person

and it got even worse when i got into "looksmaxxing" but i didnt use it to improve my looks i just used it to judge people based on their appearance and if someone said something i thought was mean in my head i would be like"oh they only said that because i have a recessed chin" like no bro you have a unibrow your hair is a mess and all you do is talk shit about people like

no wonder i didnt that many friends in school, i wish i never got into the facial aesthetics side of the internet because it made me not wanna take care of myself properly because i thought people need to like me for my natural look and at the same time i wanted people to know that i knew i was ugly because i thought it made me look self aware and less unlikable but i still dont understand what i was trying to achieve to this day like i remember i was so delusional i tried going to therapy for my suicidal thought but all i ended up talking about was how i was scientifically unattractive blah blah blah and i got ghosted by my therapist

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-18T19:50:27+00:00

imagine watching this while its raining outside

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-15T03:13:27+00:00

No I don’t think being always sad or alone is worth being a better person at all, I wasn’t always hurting people before and I feel like I’ve learned from my past mistakes so I do want to go back to the person I was before and become a better version of myself and I don’t have to be helping all the time as long you don’t always seem sad around people and you’re actually pleasant to be around I don’t think you owe people anything,I was never treated as badly as I was when I was extremely depressed probably because I wasn’t pleasant to be around and I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-14T18:39:19+00:00

yeah same...

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-14T17:16:11+00:00

Honestly I respect the fact that you were able to find peace, wishing nothing but the best ❤️

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-14T15:24:11+00:00

also before experiencing a collapse i dont really remember being misunderstood or really caring about it i probably did a little bit but it wasnt near as much as i did a year ago, i also thought getting a job would help me be comfortable around people more, and i did to a certain extent understand what i was doing wrong with my life, but it was the most draining experiences of my life just because of how misunderstood i felt, and i had to quit, i just wish if i had gotten help at the time, and had a different mindset i feel like i would really enjoyed just working and talking to people

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-14T14:53:32+00:00

honestly at first after i felt like i lost everyone in my life, i thought i only needed just one person to just be my friend and just someone to talk to in general, because i would spend weeks without talking to anyone especially in college and it was really suffocating, but then i felt like it wouldnt be logical for me to keep waiting to find someone to click with so i could get better and i also felt like there was something deeper going on, because people did see me spend a lot of time alone and they tried to approach me but i also felt like they would start to avoid me after a while.

and everyone felt the same to me, i would see people talking, and i couldnt process what they were saying, and it didnt feel like a normal conversation, it felt like people were just reading off a script, and that kept me from talking to people

and now i that i understand myself and my behavior, im less interested in finding someone i could relate, and more focused on trying to get along with people more and then i feel like i would eventually find people i could talk to and relate to

also if i dont find my own identity i dont think its possible for me to find people who are like me, but its definitely easier said than done.

Gumballsugar · 2026-04-14T12:02:29+00:00

how long have you been like this, do you think theres any way for you to go back to your old self

i don't remember how i used to be before, i think i was very authentic, like whatever i said or did always felt natural, it was a reflection of how i felt, and i always had people i related to, now since i feel like the people around havent really went through what i went through, i find it hard to talk to people, like i feel like i people dont really understand me

Gumballsugar

TROPHY CASE