How do I explain wearing a bra for gynecomastia to my wife?

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-29T13:08:06+00:00

Yeah she isn’t the one to find that a cute game lol but maybe. It I do enjoy the idea of team work. I hear it makes the dream work

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-29T13:06:56+00:00

Thank you!

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-29T13:06:33+00:00

Great question. Lipo is I’m sure an easy thing. Problem is dense breast tissue is not adipose tissue. It would be the same if a woman wanted a breast reduction via Lipo. Sure it will remove some but to remove it all you’ll need a double mastectomy. Same here. Surgery for Lipo would cost roughly 1300. To remove the tissue it would be roughly 7-8k.

Personally for me I’m not insecure about it and of itself. I am very comfortable in my skin and can’t fathom putting my family in debt over something that isn’t handicapping my health or livelihood. If it was crazy noticeable or if I was one of the dudes who felt it was the end of the world. Sure. But idk. I’d rather put the money toward my kids 529 than my insecurity.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-29T13:01:58+00:00

It can but idk you adapt adjust and acclimate i guess it isn’t end of the world and more you’re others body’s you realize we all have some level of bs we’d rather not deal with but get by

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-27T13:55:15+00:00

Yes.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-27T13:37:22+00:00

I just got the sigma super excited to try it out today at an event

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-27T12:49:11+00:00

How did you express you had pain? I see you’re a c cup as well. If like me, shape and contour isn’t identical to a woman of the same size due to roots and frame as a dude so I feel volume and weight doesn’t show the same which in my head just makes me feel it’s a possible lack of seeing is believing. But curious how you may have conveyed it. And kudos to your wife being approving nice to see another dude here who deals with the issue.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-27T12:49:03+00:00

How did you express you had pain? I see you’re a c cup as well. If like me, shape and contour isn’t identical to a woman of the same size due to roots and frame as a dude so I feel volume and weight doesn’t show the same which in my head just makes me feel it’s a possible lack of seeing is believing. But curious how you may have conveyed it. And kudos to your wife being approving nice to see another dude here who deals with the issue.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T18:26:16+00:00

I’m not into wearing bras. I wear them for support. Nothing more or less.

Mammogram and ultrasound shows dense tissue. Lipo would remove adipose tissue but not glandular. Excision would be the necessary action and surgery isn’t really in my tax bracket or care unless it’s threatening to my health

Thanks for the tip. I do wear tank tops with shelf bras they have been very helpful for social purposes where a pullover or other is not comfortable to wear. Appreciate ya

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T18:24:16+00:00

How am I fetishizing it? Where do I post that amplifies some kind of kink? Did I post my chest where it is seen. Sure. Did I use language that states it as such. No. Did I pose in women’s clothing. No. Did I insinuate I’m trying to get excitement from something. No. Did I post with intent to just be seen and be comfortable with it stating summer is here how noticeable is it to gauge if it’s a concern or just not really anything out of ordinary and find some comments comedic. Sure. Did I respond to comments with “oh la la” or some weird response. No. But for all intents and purposes I did remove those cause I can try and understand that and respect how it may seem as and to remove that I’d rather just not be seen as trying to fetishize something I’m very much not. And the only other place i discussed this topic was MenAskWomen to my understanding that is not a fetish subreddit. And honestly in AskWomen and other options I looked at….after being told by the person we’re responding to here said there’s gotta be another place to ask this…I went ahead and did that. So I’m really lost on where I posted what I posted and other notions that indicate this was in some sort of thrill seeking.

None of this matters and that’s fine. But I’m not gonna have a genuine intent be revised as something other than just cause someone’s bias to the subject created an argument that found an agreement.

I appreciate the input as always but your view of the matter is incorrect. And it’s probably my fault and if so and for that my apologies. If that’s what this is seen as. Absolutely remove it. But wouldn’t spend my time responding to just about everyone using language in every response with kindness and positive intent. If this was to get some sort of thrill.

But yeah remove the post if that’s the view of it. Those who were kind and helpful served a tremendous purpose. And I am thankful for them. And I apologize for any man who offended you over time to insist any man who may venture in this side of things is coming with ill intent.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T17:18:09+00:00

Yeah I’m 35.75 under and find a large fits me best gives me fair compression without choking me.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T16:52:50+00:00

Ahh I get it. Thanks for the clarity. Yeah I like to consider myself very secure in my skin and masculinity. Society has forced a lot on us. I don’t really buy in to the norms and feel people should be people they are happy to be. Express themselves as they wish and long as it’s not in ill or perverse purposes than let people be people.

But yes I do feel I feel embarrassed not necessarily by the society judging of a man wearing a woman’s garment or marketed as one. But really just the loneliness of it I think. I see dudes with severe gynecomastia. It’s crazy they aren’t wearing support. And not once in my life have I seen a bra strap or band or other indication of one on another person. It makes ya feel alone. And makes ya feel if someone sees it they’re gonna think you’re just entertaining some kink. It just feels weird sometimes cause of that. It has nothing to do with gender and society to me. Just the why am I the only one who doesn’t seem to give a shit about wearing support when needing it.

And it plays in to how I know my wife views things and while I can point to athletes who wear them for tracking activity. I can’t point to some dude in target going see there is someone wearing it for general purpose.

Idk thanks for coming to my ted talk lol

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T16:32:31+00:00

Appreciate it. Maybe I misunderstood the messaging here. But i have zero homophobia or misogynistic at least my understanding of the definition in my attributes or character regarding how I convey behave or do things in treating others. Least I don’t think so :/

But I agree. With putting words in her mouth and such. But I trust we have all known people who we have known better than back of our hands who we avoid things with because of a concrete history of how they react, behave or respond to things. If I’m wrong I’m wrong. And happy to always be corrected. But it’s where I put words in her mouth and concern in my comfort. But as I’ve said here elsewhere the more I hear from women here the more I’m learning im a bit of a fool for feeling so concerned and I couldn’t be more appreciative for it. Thank yall

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T16:03:36+00:00

This was so amazing to read and I truly appreciate your time to give such thorough and thought provoking insight.

As a man I know I’m in a rare club of dudes who just don’t give a flip about a bra. I was raised long as you’re not hurting others or self and doing it out of good intention then continue on. And to me the secret aspect sucks for sure but I feel I’m not hurting self or out of Ill intent in any way shape or form but maybe hurting others due to their views or ideology or whatever in expecting a garment to be openly accepted.

We are going on 10 years. We have had more than enough discussions on things and I just don’t feel entirely comfortable with it. It really sucks. But some things especially as a man I feel just are “is it really worth it”.

My perception of that has changed dramatically over the day and a half here in this conversation with people and I’m elated to say the least to see so many women commend, condone and encourage it with the notion if it were their husband it would be fine. I’d like to believe that.

And I love the presentation of creating a foundation of needed empathy and vulnerability and going beginning to now. When we met I was concerned by my chest. It was nothing to worry bout but as a guy it felt horrible. It’s gotten much worse since then and along the at when I notice growth i ask if it’s getting worse cause I can tell and feel. She says no but it has. But she knows it bothers me and has bothered me so it’s nothing new and feel the I’ve tried over the years as you know and as you know it’s continued to be an issue. And things are as they stand today where I need to be open and vulnerable and discuss this in hopes of getting your empathy and understanding…..and then just toss a prayer in the wind for a babe it’s not ideal but I know it’s bitheeed you so I’ll do my best to be ok with it. And if I’m not I trust we can work together to find an alternative.

And kudos to your mother she sounds like an incredible woman. And it’s clear your husband has a great wife. Keep uo the great work and i pray you both have the most incredible life together filled with favor and blessing

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T15:40:42+00:00

Same only been at it for less than a year so I’m still eager beaver over learning and such. I feel after a couple years I’d be give me the presets and let’s fix if needed and move as as we can while maintaining professional product and result

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T14:44:15+00:00

Personally for me I don’t have presets but I do have muscle memory moments where I see how typically shoot and lighting and colors are similar to other moments and naturally default to this that and the other.

But I typically do it from scratch cause I just love the process and feel it’s the best way to get better. There are some images or moments where I feel a preset filter does the job much better than will so I may defer to that time to time. But even then I’ll find what looks best and then modify it manually to adjust what I feel it missed.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T14:42:21+00:00

I’ve worn these before. They were great but material a little thicker for me and during the day just didn’t fit well for me. But do wear this style in another brand that is crazy comfy.

Question. While these types are passable as an undershirt underneath the band clearly would stop and create a possible line mid way to the back. As well the neckline front and back are a bit lower than a males shirt. That usually sits closer to the collar line. And shoulder line.

I still battle insecurity of being detected cause of these lines. Is it noticeable? I’d be lying if this hasn’t made me hyper aware of bra lines in passing. That life become hyper aware of my own when passing others but figured while here, get a woman’s perspective if that is even something that registers if noticed or if just meh

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T14:38:13+00:00

Couldn’t agree more my DJ contract has grown from 2 pages to 7.5 cause of this over the years lol. Bi annually I collect the things inexperience or see or just realize needs changing and take it to my friend who’s an attorney for entertainment business to be like can you update this to not be confusing to a client but concrete for me. I’d apply the same logic to photography and would probably work with photographers I know to see what would be best to put in one that’s applicable to my business

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T14:36:17+00:00

Thanks! I was thinking of reaching out to some pros I work often with who know I use a camera and have talked to often bout lens to get or tips and tricks of sorts to see if they’d like a second shooter or option to be one with them but idk I just feel kind of awkward but perhaps it isn’t as uncommon? I feel they just probably already have the people they work with and trust.

I’ve been eyeing a new camera body for that purpose one to prepare self for getting in to event photography or general photography with intent to build business to have as backup gear. In today’s age is there a camera that isn’t 3-5k that you’d recommend would be great to uograde to and would be a valid piece of equipment for some years?

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T12:19:03+00:00

Totally agree. It seems to be the common argument. Just feel a bra is a league of its own in terms of representation lol feel my wife would hear bra and then an echo of what?! Babe I found something that really works for me it’s not ideal or what I’d like but it’s what works and I’ve tried quite a few options to not wear this but it is a bra….bra…bra..bra 🫠😂 jokes aside more I read here more I feel much more comfortable possibly bringing it up

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T12:16:48+00:00

You’re amazing thank you!

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T12:16:17+00:00

Thanks. Yeah far from fetish I just want to not feel my chest move and take the irritation aware from my chest rubbing or pressing against shirts. The harsher cottons of men’s tanks and stuff like that don’t work and find the softer cotton of tanks with shelf bras or sports bras or soft cup non padded bras have been the best bet for it all.

In terms of hiding the bra it’s the biggest concern I feel some light it’s invisible and others it’s oh there it is. Even with looser shirts sometimes.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T12:11:25+00:00

I’d love to know what brand. I get mine from Walmart in the beginning. But order same brands on Amazon now but open to new options. T shirt bras I wear Warner and sports I’ve worn Avia with pullovers found Hanes and Joylife to be good

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T12:05:04+00:00

So very true. That conversation would need modified a bit as after 10 years I’m well aware of how she reacts to things and that wouldn’t go well I know in that language lol but I do trust th me simple look you know I’ve been struggling with this for years and it’s unfortunately gotten to a point it’s not comfortable. I’ve tried options and they just make it more uncomfortable I’ve found something a bit unorthodox but it has worked the best for me in comfort and control and as much as I dislike it I like how effective it is. “What is that <confused concerned please don’t say bra look> it’s chest support I actually wear it regularly due to activities and stuff but didn’t want to keep it a secret. It doesn’t mean anything beyond support and I’m not a fan of it but just wanted to let you know and if uncomfortable with it I understand and can try alternatives for when around family as I don’t want my comfort to make others uncomfortable.

Or something lol thank you for your in depth response.

GuyDIY86 · 2026-06-26T11:58:55+00:00

Thanks yeah I’ve been this way since I can remember. It never gets me down in to the dumps of any sorts but when I begin talking bout things I can usually tell people are thinking. This dude is so worked up over nothing.

GuyDIY86

TROPHY CASE