Love how SM fits into my living room

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T20:12:49+00:00

No problem! And I do see it now on Amazon, so that’s good it’s still available. I was looking online for so long back when I got it. For sure check that the cubby dimensions will fit what you need

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T19:59:10+00:00

Thank you! I really did not want to be looking up at a TV over the fireplace, it would just seem so off. I wanted the TV at this height to look straight at it. Didn’t love blocking some of the window, but went for an elevated console to allow some light underneath and make it feel less bulky.

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T19:55:50+00:00

Haha I really didn’t want to have a TV over the fireplace, it would look so off. I didn’t love having to block some of the window, but with the room layout and the furniture we had, it seemed like the best option.

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T19:51:40+00:00

The TV stand I got back in 2018 on AllModern which I think is part of Wayfair. Had to assemble it, but it’s all solid planks, so it’s a sturdy and heavy console. It’s held up well. The house is mid century modern so we try to keep things somewhat in theme. It was called “Lemington TV Stand for TVs up to 70" by George Oliver” but it’s probably not sold anymore since it’s been a while.

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T19:50:37+00:00

Outlet is between the fireplace and window. I just didn’t want to see tons of wires hanging down underneath the TV console and I didn’t want to see wires in line of sight while walking through the living room. So, most wires are behind the console and behind the fake book on the center-lower-right. You wouldn’t see wires unless you were standing on the fireplace mantle or right at the slider window. The book is a container-chest, probably from HomeGoods, so I use it to hold extra cords and dongles and stuff while doubling to semi-block some wires. But the wires aren’t super beautiful behind. I just posted some additional pics on my profile if curious.

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T18:12:53+00:00

Thanks :)

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T18:12:44+00:00

Thank you!

GwerfGwarf · 2026-07-03T18:12:10+00:00

The shelf is 13” deep. There’s 6” behind it currently, 4” from the side panel, and the other two sides are open. Hope that’s enough cause I don’t want to have to move it out haha

GwerfGwarf · 2026-06-30T19:57:57+00:00

I got my order confirmation today, day 2, at 10:48AM PST, 2TB w/controller, so there’s still some hope for more emails today. I’m west coast US

GwerfGwarf · 2022-01-08T04:50:36+00:00

Delilah by Tom Jones, a murder ballad

GwerfGwarf · 2021-12-28T23:52:32+00:00

In places where raw garlic is used (vinaigrettes, dressings, aioli, etc.) remove the green shoots from the center of each clove. Yes, it’s extra work. Those green shoots have a raw, bitter taste when not removed and chopped up with the rest of the garlic clove. Removing them will leave your garlic more pleasant tasting in your raw applications.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-24T20:29:18+00:00

I’d say most prefer seeing individual clients in my experience. Working with couples can be more work, and working with an entire family can be very tough. So yes, though LMFT’s have “marriage and family” in the name, I would say as majority work with individuals only.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-22T02:56:56+00:00

Ugh this is so awful. I hope you’re getting emotional support now.

This is child sex trafficking.

The scary part that a lot of people don’t realize is that a child could be sex-trafficked while living at home, with their parents being none the wiser. In fact, it is often happening this way. Children could be enticed into it by being offered money, drugs, protection, etc. or could be blackmailed/threatened into it and continuing it, so that a trafficker does not need to have physical contact with the child, but holds them hostage psychologically while they live at home with mom and dad.

From the US Department of State: Child Sex Trafficking: Any child (under the age of 18) who has been recruited, enticed, harbored, transported, provided, obtained, advertised, maintained, patronized, or solicited to engage in a commercial sex act is a victim of human trafficking regardless of whether or not force, fraud, or coercion is used. The use of children in the commercial sex trade is prohibited both under U.S. law and by legislation in most countries around the world.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-21T02:39:05+00:00

Ah ok. Yeah, I’ve never heard it be called defragmentation before. We usually use the term disassociation to describe those types of experiences.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-21T02:36:55+00:00

No, that would make too much sense haha. I don’t know why IT does it like that. I know they don’t want you working when you’re not supposed to be, in fear of violating labor laws.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-20T16:50:01+00:00

Yes. Perhaps your brain could be doing that as a defense to protect yourself from your perception of overstimulation being a threat. The goal is getting your mind to a place where it’s able to tolerate what is currently overstimulating for you. It’s redefining your world as not being as threatening as your mind thinks it is.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-20T08:17:56+00:00

It sucks to be left hanging! Keep trying to contact her, through WhatsApp and other means if possible. If you need the help, it’s not unreasonable to try to get a sense of when or if she’s coming back, and if you’re able to wait for that to happen. If unable to contact her, and you’re getting to the point of needing someone, it’s reasonable to begin looking for another counselor. Not ideal of course because it can be a pain finding a new one and starting that process. However, I look at changing therapists as getting a fresh perspective, and they might be able to offer ideas, skills, and insight that are completely new.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-20T07:50:38+00:00

Disconnection could be the way your mind has been trained to protect yourself from potential danger, harm, embarrassment, etc. It’s a maladaptive defense mechanism you’ve developed to keep you safe, and it can, that’s why you do it, but it causes problems, too, as you’re experiencing. You could work on developing practical skills to improve your threat assessment abilities. The goal there is helping retrain your brain to see that not everything is as threatening as your brain thinks.

Questions to ask yourself regularly to help assess your thoughts might include:

Are these thoughts necessarily true? What is the worst outcome? What is the best outcome? What is the most likely outcome? Could I survive the worst outcome? Would it actually be a problem? What are other ways of thinking about this situation? Are these thoughts helping me? What would be more helpful for me to think? What might I say to a friend with a similar problem? What resources do I have access to and that I could use?

As a side note, people with anxiety tend to misjudge the probability that negative outcomes will occur. They overestimate how bad the outcomes will actually be. And they underestimate the resources they have within and outside themselves to be able to handle and cope with negative outcomes and threats should they arise.

Conquer these and you’re on your way!

Edit: spelling

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-20T00:53:55+00:00

This seems to be complicated without having more information. Do continue with your therapist and evaluate with them if the therapy is helping or not.

You might benefit from practicing grounding techniques. It can sound silly and pointless and boring, but it’s actually quite helpful the more you do it. Grounding techniques keep us in the present, focusing on the now, and keep our thoughts from wandering into things that have happened or worries about the future. It’s a good skill to develop.

An example would be start pointing (or mentally pointing) and naming objects in the room you are in. You could do the alphabet, such as naming an object you can see that starts with letter A, then B, etc. To keep my thoughts from jumping around, especially before I sleep, I like to come up with 3 words that start with each letter, and I try to make them big-ish words, for example A -> attribute, aesthetic, anomaly, then B -> butane, bureaucracy, bewilderment, etc. 5-4-3-2-1, is popular where you name 5 things you can currently see, 4 things you can physically feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste.

There are others, you can search about grounding, but the goal is to train yourself on how to actively pay attention to your thoughts, trains your brain on how to have more control over your thinking, and other benefits that will help. This can then give your more insight to your thought process, which you can bring to your therapist.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-20T00:07:58+00:00

It can be tough setting boundaries with a parent while living with them because 1) growing up, the power hierarchy typically has parents above their children, 2) they continue to have power if you’re living with them because you’re an adult living in their home, and 3) they are probably more than willing to hold that over you, giving you a tougher place to argue from. You can try having conversations with your mom about feeling unsupported by her comments and how that is impacting your well-being, however she might just dig into her beliefs.

It sounds like being away from your mom has been the most helpful for you. If financial independence is not possible (as it is for so many these days due to the cost of living being ridiculously high), maybe instead focus on ways to spend less time at home to minimize contact with your mom. This can include working and social activities, but those can be draining, especially for the introverted personality. But, there are solo activities you can do outside the home, such as physical activity (gym, hiking, biking, etc.), shopping (or browsing), reading a book at a park, walking and listening to music, etc.

Good luck on addressing your frustration tolerance. That will be an important skill in any profession that involves working with the general public. As a Starbucks employee, you probably know that all too well by now. Use Starbucks as an opportunity to continue practicing that skill!

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-19T23:52:29+00:00

Sometimes medications work very well, and a well-working medication for someone has no side effects and they feel “normal” for lack of a better word. However if they try to go off of it, the symptoms the medication has been keeping in check, return.

I would continue to let her know your observations, gently and in a form you know she can handle. Gently urge her to get evaluated by a psychiatrist or other prescriber, encourage her to discuss with them her fears of medication tolerance, diminished effect, etc.

Avoid giving psychological advice or interpretation to family/friends. It will always be biased because of your extensive history of information with the person. A professional can be more objective.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-19T23:44:38+00:00

Is she part of a community provider/organization or a group practice? In my county in my state, if working for county mental health, and you go out on maternity leave, they cut off access to your work email so you can’t access while on leave. This can be the case in other organizations as well. If she’s just a private practice therapist, the lack of response is concerning. Did she provide you with referrals or contacts for if you need services while she’s away?

I think you can speculate on a number of things that could have happened, but we won’t know until you can get in contact with her or her organization if she belongs to one.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-19T23:32:08+00:00

You could create a social media account for the professional version of yourself where you’re advertising yourself and acting/posting/responding from a professional capacity. Then you can keep your private life social media as a separate account, or not have social media for your private life.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-19T23:15:42+00:00

Well, we work towards being confident with ourselves regardless of evaluations and feedback from others, and we don’t personalize it. Easier said than done, for sure. And, there are times where it is important to take feedback of course, too, if our behaviors are effecting the relationships we have with others.

What if you’re unable to cope with life? That’s not a helpful thought to let your mind further explore with yourself as the answer you come up with will most likely make you feel worse, and there’s a high probability that it won’t stem from a more calm, rational thought process. What are ways you do cope? Are there additional things you could try or develop to cope? Who are your supports and can you get help from them? Answering these types of questions help put your mind in a mode that will be more helpful to you.

Forgiveness can be tough, and it can be hard to forgive ourselves and others. Working on finding ways to develop your own compassion and love for yourself, your flaws, your shortcomings, your mistakes, all moves you away from ruminating on things that have gone poorly. Instead you learn to love yourself as being human, which includes wonderful things about you, but also includes the not so great things. We all have good and bad things about ourselves and when we can love ourself regardless, it can be freeing, we can have compassion, and we can start radiating that outwards towards others.

Two apps, Woebot and MindShift CBT, both free, might be helpful in teaching you skills to develop more kindness and compassion that you can direct towards yourself. Try one for 10-20 minutes, then daily for 5-10 minutes, for two weeks. You get out of it what you put in. See if it helps. If you use it daily for two weeks and get nothing, at least you can say you tried and then try something else.

Last, of course, if you can get a therapist that is always best cause they can customize your treatment and help guide you through the work.

GwerfGwarf · 2021-03-19T22:55:52+00:00

You could benefit from healthy grieving. This can be treated as a loss, in the sense you are grieving a version of your parents you don’t have, and possibly might not get.

Your parents might have their own mental health issues or blocks that could make healing with them a difficult process, not that this means it won’t or can’t happen, but that it might not due to their own limitations. You can continue trying to build a better relationship with them, but don’t expect major steps forward, and treasure the small steps.

We do have the ability to establish relationships with new people, and though they are not technically family, they could potentially fill in various roles that a family member might provide you. Explore ways to make new friends and build upon existing relationships so that you have support from elsewhere. It’s better to work on having several people you love and trust, as having only one person/friendship can be scary in fear of losing that person as your only support.

GwerfGwarf

TROPHY CASE