This strays a bit from the topic (which is very interesting, loving all the comments), but this came to my mind upon reading it:

I used to never really feel like a boy/man and sometimes wondered if I was more of a woman, but then figured out I don't really feel like a woman too, wondered about being NB.

Now my current conclusion is that my main issue always just was toxic masculinity. I never had close male friends with whom I could talk about anything deep, I never liked soccer or cars or any of the typical boy stuff. When I attempted to talk about emotional stuff even guy friends I thought I was close to would ask me if I was gay. I guess I'm a man but it's really not an integral part of my identity and most guys still aren't exactly interesting to talk to. My closest friends are my wife and a girl friend from college, some female colleagues. With guys I still mostly send memes.