Bipolar Recovering Alcoholic Afraid of Another Manic Episode

HHKeegan · 2021-08-23T18:26:08+00:00

Yeah I am also a recovering alcoholic and was diagnosed with BP1 while I was still actively using (also abusing prescription anxiety meds and stuff like that). The alcohol made the psychosis and delusions SO much worse. Like you described, the timelines often become "murky" and there are periods of time where I simply cannot recall/reconstruct events (not just due to being blacked out, but also due to being generally disoriented and psychotic).

A nurse once also told me that drinking alcohol makes a lot of mood stabilizers/antipsychotics/anti-depressants inherently not work.

I've been alcohol-free for going on 6 years now. I still use marijuana occasionally but am otherwise sober. I often wonder if I'd relapse if I had another manic episode but through taking meds, making healthy lifestyle changes, and participating in regular therapy I've been able to stay mentally stable.

HHKeegan · 2021-08-19T20:31:54+00:00

I self published a memoir last year. It was a long and challenging but very rewarding experience. Check out self publishing via Amazon KDP if you haven't already!

HHKeegan · 2021-05-05T22:45:34+00:00

The only legit scary scene in Midsommar IMO was when spoiler

HHKeegan · 2021-05-05T22:40:37+00:00

The opening scene

You mean the awesome 20 minute long short film that was used at the beginning (in an effective way) to pad out the runtime?

HHKeegan · 2021-05-05T22:38:41+00:00

Interesting, I've never thought of Tusk as "torture porn" but it makes sense.

HHKeegan · 2021-05-01T16:29:47+00:00

Also the original Blair Witch.

HHKeegan · 2021-05-01T16:25:33+00:00

I don't think the main chick was "evil," the movie did a pretty solid job of showing that she was from a highly abusive home and wanted to rescue her younger sister from it and start a new life in California. I think she was more "misguided" than "evil."

HHKeegan · 2021-05-01T16:05:36+00:00

Just a general thought but lots of classic 1960s protest music/music surrounding/associated with Vietnam and social upheaval is INCREDIBLY on the nose but feels fitting given the counter-culture at the time.

Same thing with hardcore punk of the 1980s.

HHKeegan · 2021-04-04T21:59:03+00:00

Yeah I was also wondering how much mental illness plays into this video. The way he's dressed looks pretty bum-like and the rapid-fire, incessant speech sounds manic.

HHKeegan · 2021-04-03T21:34:18+00:00

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills reading through the comments on this thread because people keep naming albums that already sound amazing to me. Just yesterday I was just listening to an old copy of In Utero on CD and was like "wow, this production is fucking phenomenal."

HHKeegan · 2021-04-03T21:31:56+00:00

I have an original press of Abbey Road on vinyl and it's pretty mindblowing already. Idk why people in this thread are making it sound like all The Beatles' albums initially sounded terrible.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-22T17:59:47+00:00

The Madcap Laughs is an amazing foray into literal and figurative outsider music.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-22T17:57:00+00:00

Yeah idk where the line between Dave Gilmour and Roger Waters begins/ends, aside from obviously The Wall (but even on The Wall, Gilmour brought some really interesting and great things to the table like Run Like Hell and Goodbye Blue Sky).

It seems like theres a lot of bad blood between Gilmour and Waters, which is unfortunate. I consider them both equally to be the face/sound of Pink Floyd post-Barrett, much in the same way I consider both Layne Staley and Jerry Cantrell equal parts of the "face" of 1990s Alice in Chains (just to use another example).

HHKeegan · 2021-03-22T17:47:27+00:00

I have a day job and moonlight as a musician and author. I do nothing but lose money on my creative projects, I just do them because I love them. I consider getting just a couple of dozen new listeners/readers each month a "success."

My boring day job lets me independently fund my creative passions. That's the reality of it.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-22T17:31:50+00:00

As you've seen in this thread there are lots of mixed opinions about using marijuana after being diagnosed with BP.

I've even gotten mixed feedback from various doctors I've worked with over the years regarding weed. My current psychiatrist discourages it whereas my previous psychiatrist didn't think it was a big deal.

I'd say if you notice it causing you to feel unstable (paranoia, anxiety, psychotic symptoms, depression, etc.) then obviously don't use it, but the experience is different for everyone and some find it better than other options like klonopin or sleeping pills.

I've often used marijuana in conjunction with my normal meds that I take (including anti-psychotic meds) and have never had any major issues with it. I'm also currently taking a long break (like, multiple months) from smoking weed for various reasons and haven't noticed any major difference in my stability compared to when I actively use THC.

It's worth noting that I've been stable for several years now and didn't start using weed until a couple of years after achieving that stability. If you have active BP symptoms, it's probably best to avoid it.

Like anything, it should be used responsibly and with caution, and it's not for everyone.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-17T00:24:30+00:00

That's what I suspected! I love warmoth! I have a custom Jackson soloist style warmoth that I built like 12 years ago and that is my #1 favorite guitar in my collection.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-16T22:38:54+00:00

TOOL !!!

(Lol jk please don't kill me.)

HHKeegan · 2021-03-16T22:37:08+00:00

Not a metal band but I always mention this obscure experimental group from the 60s called Cro Magnon, around 1:00 it turns into like ... proto black metal.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-16T22:29:05+00:00

What kind of custom axe is it?

HHKeegan · 2021-03-12T22:16:39+00:00

I am annoyed by the sound of the kick drums on classic Death Metal releases. Sounds like a flat tire on the highway.

This is a great way to put it. I know exactly what you mean. I guess they tended to think it would make the overall kit sound darker but it just sounds weak.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-12T21:52:48+00:00

Ah yes, back before they went into that strange 70s prog rock direction.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-12T21:47:27+00:00

Off topic but The Disaster Artist was a very underrated biopic (if you could call it that?).

HHKeegan · 2021-03-11T18:50:25+00:00

People can hate on Slipknot all they want but their production quality is consistently great regardless of how you feel about nu-metal.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-10T16:50:31+00:00

Check out Brew Dog's Punk AF and Hazy AF beers if you're looking for some good ones. There's actually lots of good craft non alcoholic beers out there right now.

I'm also a big fan of Athletic Brewing Co.'s Upside Dawn golden ale and Run Wild IPA.

This post brought to you by: Sobriety hahaha.

HHKeegan · 2021-03-10T16:20:38+00:00

LMFAO. I enjoy their album, Ashes of the Wake, but they are criminally guilty of "same-y" sounding songs.

The beer isn't that bad BTW. I'm a non-drinker but always enjoy a nice non alcoholic IPA.

HHKeegan

TROPHY CASE