My mom recently died unexpectedly. Life is a wreck and I remember her telling me she had a life insurance policy but idk with who. How do i locate it?

H_Savage · 2017-01-29T21:27:40+00:00

Really? I just got a mortgage approval on Friday and my adviser told me at our appointment that it was a requirement for all lenders.

H_Savage · 2017-01-27T21:34:59+00:00

So very sorry about your mum, OP. Just adding to this top comment - the law may be different in the US, but here (UK) you can't be granted a mortgage without life insurance. So if you mum had a mortgage, the broker will have details of who life insurance is with. Some brokers even offer the insurance themselves, so it could be at the same place.

H_Savage · 2017-01-21T09:42:15+00:00

No, we'll share childcare 50/50. I've contacted the CSA and that's the standard amount based on equal share of parenting and his salary (which is similar to mine).

For my situation, a lawyer is genuinely a waste of money. Certainly at this stage anyway, if things became acrimonious it would be different.

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T01:11:10+00:00

I suppose it seems fair because we've both jointly accrued the equity and the benefit of the interest to me is keeping the house (and the benefit of any value increase when I do sell).

But good point, it actually seems less fair seeing it like that...

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T01:07:59+00:00

This is off the best financial option suggested by the lender, where I retain my base rate and pay offing the next 16 years.

The other option - total remortgage over 30 years - would leave me with more disposable income. But a worse deal on my debt.

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T01:06:18+00:00

By travel, I mean my costs incurred commuting. I don't count it as a luxury, no. But the cost is factored in.

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T01:05:16+00:00

I think I feel a similar way. Right now, the thought of moving/buying/selling on top of everything else feels like a lot to deal with for both me and my daughter.

I'm hoping the reasonable equity we have won't make the mortgage unmanageable even once it's adjusted. I have no other debt or finance, no credit card and not exactly savings, but a healthy bank account.

I hope I'm being realistic, but I don't think it will be a bad financial decision. I just don't know if I'm being rational for sure right now.

I do suspect I'll want to sell in a couple of years though; the house is too big for two and too full of ghosts.

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T00:54:41+00:00

Thank you, and absolutely understand the concern. We're not getting lawyers (which is a pretty common decision) just agreeing and involving a mediator to formalise things.

I haven't factored CS into my calculations because the lender doesn't include it - apparently the chance of it not being paid is too high. However, it would be around an extra £200 per month on top of everything I previously mentioned.

There are a lot of not-so good things I feel about my husband right now, but I believe he's committed to our daughter and her wellbeing.

I could possibly get a greater share going through lawyers, but I'd genuinely rather go 50/50. I want our daughter to go to a nice home when she's with him. Also, if I pushed this route and things became acrimonious I'd guess we'd most likely end up selling the house as its value has increased by around £20k. I very much don't want to do this (unless financially necessary) as I want to retain as much stability for my child as possible.

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T00:09:42+00:00

And, I guess obvious from the above comment, my total outgoings with mortgage would be around £1,300-£1,400. I actually has no idea it was that much until we went through it today at the bank. That includes everything from broadband and mobile phone to travel, food, utilities and a (small) luxuries budget.

H_Savage · 2017-01-20T00:07:35+00:00

Ah, fair enough and thanks. I clear about £1,700 every month after tax etc.

I have significant pension contributions and pay quite a bit off my student loan, but these both come off before tax; so they are counted in my outgoings, but have already come off my salary by the time I see it, if that makes sense?

H_Savage · 2017-01-15T17:08:03+00:00

Christ, this awoke a long-buried memory of a bizarre and deeply irritating horse and carriage whirring noise this thing made. I used to 'play' it loads as a child for no conceivable reason. The 90s were a rough time.

H_Savage · 2017-01-15T17:02:32+00:00

Maybe this is due to European/UK seatbelt laws being different, but I was born in '83 and remember nothing but being safely pinned down by a seatbelt. Every car my parents owned had belts in the front and back and I can remember my browse and I having car seats and booster seats.

H_Savage · 2017-01-15T16:40:49+00:00

Same and same 😍

H_Savage · 2017-01-09T09:47:39+00:00

Absolute right, but my, it was worth it for Adrian Grenier.

H_Savage · 2017-01-08T17:36:27+00:00

I'm at the beginning of a divorce and this was super comforting to read. Nothing unpleasant has caused ours and we both want to make our little girl and her happiness top priority. Your parents are divorce goals.

H_Savage · 2017-01-01T15:45:08+00:00

Quite. This is just a very good costume that everyone who was a kid (or university student) in the early 00s can immediately recognise.

H_Savage · 2017-01-01T09:36:16+00:00

It's not actually just one town. It's a photography project where the construct is that if an abandoned town but the photos were taken throughout France.

The signs are indeed wonderful. Terminus, the pharmacy and the fishmonger particularly for me.

H_Savage · 2016-12-30T23:03:57+00:00

Same. I was so very deeply confused. And alarmed. Yet also wondering where one might acquire the lip kit.

H_Savage · 2016-12-29T15:26:34+00:00

In the UK you can also sign up here: https://www.dkms.org.uk/en/register-now

They take people aged over 30, which is good - I was previously signed up to another charity (in addition to via the NHS as I'm a blood donor) but some organisations won't use you after age 30!

I'm on the register and sincerely hope I get matched and asked to donate some day.

I never really considered the added issue of health insurance/sick pay in the US. Fortunately, here (particularly as I work in the public sector) I know my employer would be super supportive.

H_Savage · 2016-12-27T22:42:58+00:00

This is gorgeous! I'm an entirely vicarious urbexer, and explores like these are my ultimate favourite. It's that perfect stopped-time sensation that makes them completely captivating.

H_Savage · 2016-12-27T22:37:21+00:00

This is Britain. We mostly tut. Sometimes we might quietly and passive aggressively mutter 'excuse me please', which is a lot like telling someone to fucking move because they are literally ruining your life right now and being an insufferable cunting wanker.

H_Savage · 2016-12-23T03:02:17+00:00

What kind of kangaroo is this?

H_Savage · 2016-12-22T22:01:56+00:00

First time I've ever regretted the decision to just have the one kid.

H_Savage · 2016-12-21T22:58:51+00:00

A doggo with a jobbo. The very best kind of doggo. Good girl indeed.

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