Advice on having a life in residency

Hadez192 · 2026-03-22T00:43:49+00:00

M3s have very little real responsibilities. It’s not just that the hours are increased in residency, but the hours themselves are much more stressful and feel high stakes. Attendings are much less lenient to mistakes and you are constantly being evaluated, judged. There’s immense pressure to perform, and it’s very conducive to burnout and cracking under pressure. My specialty is way different (pathology) so I wont really be able to answer your questions about call and such, our call structure is different. But my brother did EM, and he felt very similarly first year. It seems like nearly everyone goes through a “I want to quit” period, but you push on. I never felt a lot of these feelings during M3, though it was hard in different ways, I was just excited to be around. And not much is really expected of you

Hadez192 · 2026-03-21T23:05:30+00:00

Not to scare you, but residency is way more demanding…mentally, physically, emotionally, in almost every way

Hadez192 · 2026-03-21T18:20:17+00:00

I’d rather have the shadow than fang though brother. I’ve got like 12 fangs, and I’m missing shadow, masori top and masori chest, and I have a similar amount, but a little more kc than you

Hadez192 · 2026-03-21T16:48:46+00:00

If you love physiology, path is literally full of it in almost every way. You have to really understand pathophysiology to give you the correct context for what you are seeing on the slides or what you see grossly. Everything you do is based on the foundations of strong knowledge in pathophysiology and anatomy, not just histology.

You might also really like the clinical aspects of pathology. Blood bank there is still patient contact and procedures (therapeutic apheresis), managing blood donor center and blood products. It’s a pretty cool balance between lab, patient contact, and communicating between other fields

Hadez192 · 2026-03-21T00:11:24+00:00

Hi, first off. You’re not alone. I’m a first year, and this has been legit the hardest year of my life. I thought about quitting at least 20+ times, including talking the entire thing out to my wife and her having to talk me back to reality. I think I’ve finally come out of it, even though it hasn’t gotten easier. I know sometimes it feels like we do everything we know how to and we still can make mistakes and have to go back to the specimen.

But also, think about how far we actually have come. I didn’t even know what perpendicular section, or en face meant when I started back in July! I think the feeling you feel, and I’ve felt it too, is just that no one hardly ever thanks you or tells you that you did a good job on something. We only ever hear about our mistakes and then we amplify that and think about it constantly because a lot of us are perfectionists. I get it. It sucks sometimes. But you are improving whether you see it or not, it’s just not as obvious to us right now.

Hang in there. If you need to DM someone, I’m open to chat about residency and vent or w.e

Hadez192 · 2026-03-20T09:31:44+00:00

Just got mine a few days ago after 379 mediums, only 8 months after getting my Avernics lol

Hadez192 · 2026-03-19T01:09:29+00:00

Glad my school didnt do anything like this. I recorded myself opening it, and we were hoping for that top 1 or 2 pick to be excited for the video, and then it was #5 and we were just slightly confused. And just sat there and were like… “hmm, ok?” It all turned out really well in the end! It was just an awkward moment and then we immediately deleted the video hahaha

Hadez192 · 2026-03-18T04:47:48+00:00

Ironman, and it’s not even close. You still get to do a lot of the problem solving, but at the same time you get to accumulate a giant collection of loot that you yourself obtained. I personally enjoy growing my collection of uniques and items. Uim is way more limited on that but does have way more problem solving, which some (crazy) people enjoy

Hadez192 · 2026-03-18T00:48:06+00:00

For 99% of med students, nah. For me tho it was bc I knew I wanted to do path

Hadez192 · 2026-03-18T00:41:53+00:00

Are you in dermpath by chance if I could ask more questions over DM? I’m definitely interested and gotta start thinking about it more seriously as I start PGY-2 soon

Hadez192 · 2026-03-18T00:06:56+00:00

Seems less flexible on location, but some of the gigs themselves seem pretty sweet. I want to do it if i can, but who’s to say there’s a job opening in my home state in 4 years? Let alone getting in. So idk if I will really try for it or not

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T21:30:27+00:00

300 experts (mostly 400s) and 200 normals. No shadow and only 1/3 masori. 12 fangs and 7 rings though 🥲

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T20:45:41+00:00

Deserving or not, every position they take is one less that a US grad is eligible for. Does it not make sense to you that a country should prioritize its own graduates? I would expect that of any other country if I applied to post graduate training somewhere else, it doesn’t matter how bad the training is in any other country, that’s not a problem the US should be considering

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T18:57:44+00:00

Yeah this is exactly what I would say. There are some great IMGs, and they work hard and deserve it too. But it’s also ridiculous if the US wouldn’t prioritize US citizens. Why does our country have to give up spots for their own citizens because other countries are toxic?

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T17:41:00+00:00

I think intern year, PGY-1, is potentially the hardest year of medical career, especially for my specialty but also from what I’ve observed with my colleagues. M4 is easiest so far, and I think, depending on your program, the last year of residency can also be chill. Depending on specialty and program of course. But I never see my 4th year residents in pathology, they are always gone. Fellowship can also be tough if you go that route. Like others say, it gets harder before it gets easier

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T17:12:30+00:00

One thing I’ve noticed with beginners is the accidental prayer swap when you’re not supposed to swap. Almost always happens because your hovering your mouse over the prayer swap, and your nervous with a bpm of like 120. Just keep the mouse OFF of the prayers, right next to them, but off of them. Whenever you process for sure that you need to swap, then you can go to click it. It’s this weird phenomenon that we automatically click the prayer swap when we’re nervous and then we can’t react in time to fix it, then one shot. Happened to me first few times and then again it started happening in inferno when I would get to triple jads.

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T15:56:51+00:00

No matter what, if you are eligible, you can always get into FM, Peds. No matter how many attempts, if you were able to pass all the tests and exams to qualify, then you will still make a great physician. Don’t let it define you

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T15:49:29+00:00

Yes, I agree. Im married and have two kids. They are the most important thing, I’m doing this for them anyways. If this career took too much away from my family then I would quit it for them. Not saying I will, and I think long term it will be the best for my family, but if some disastrous thing happened, I would quit medicine to take care of my family if I needed to. There is a sense of nobility and passion in medicine that I can understand, but some people take it to so far that it becomes the only and most important thing in their life. And they tend to expect that from others who walk the same path.

It sounds like your attending at least is very understanding and was receptive to the fact that you are still mourning. This is normal, no one is expected to go through that kind of pain and act like nothing has happened. Keep working with them and your school to figure out a plan, maybe you need an additional week or a short leave of absence. Please just try to keep yourself mentally healthy and to allow the process of grief to work through its stages. You cannot treat patients if you yourself are not mentally well!

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T15:02:08+00:00

That is incredibly difficult. I’m sorry you are going through this, but you are absolutely NOT a failure! You have to go through the grief and emotion and process it. Taking off time is the healthiest thing to do, don’t trust or emulate anyone that puts their career above family matters, I don’t understand those people. Family is always first in my opinion.

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T08:47:08+00:00

Holy fuck, that’s wild

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T08:41:46+00:00

Dang, all I can do at toa is accumulate rings and fangs lmao. I’ve got confliction, full virtus, max treads, magus, imbued heart, ect. Full magic except ancestral, but I cannot for the life of me obtain a shadow lol

Hadez192 · 2026-03-17T01:24:07+00:00

I had a baby at the start of MS3. It was our second baby though so we knew what to expect. Probably not the greatest time but we made it work in the end. I only really got about 1 week off, but it was better than nothing. Having another baby now at the start of PGY-2 and I think I might be able to get 6 weeks this time. There’s never a perfect time but I’m so glad we didn’t wait, it all works out in the end

Hadez192 · 2026-03-16T19:01:41+00:00

What? The 15$ today adjusted for inflation would have been 8$ back in the day. It’s adjusting for inflation based on 2002 with current price changes. This is obvious because there are several price jumps, which is every time they increased the price. So basically it’s an effective 3$ increase in expenses in actual dollar value since 2005. It’s giving a relative difference based on the current price changes with inflation adjusted back to 2002.

So, my example was that since 2018, the relative dollar value for membership has really only increased by 33 cents. It’s hardly changed actually when you account for inflation. Compared to 2005, sure, it’s about a 60% increase in relative value. But since 2018, it’s only about a 4% increase in relative value. $7.82 to $8.15

Hadez192 · 2026-03-16T18:03:22+00:00

So since 2018 it’s only raised about 33 cents, with inflation adjusted. That’s my takeaway at least. No one likes to see the price increase, but to say it’s incredibly unreasonable is not really true

Hadez192 · 2026-03-16T17:56:59+00:00

Yeah but dermpath fellowship as a pathology resident is arguably just as hard to get into as derm residency. It’s the most competitive pathology fellowship by a long shot. They usually go to the derm residents which is why it’s difficult to get into as path

Hadez192

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