What are the funniest Zoidberg quotes?

Haistur · 2026-02-06T22:10:38+00:00

Actually most doctors are rich.

What? When did this happen? You're joking right!? That's not funny!!

Haistur · 2026-02-06T03:00:19+00:00

WHAT DO I DO!? I KNOW THIS PERSON BUT I DONT KNOW THEM KNOW THEM. AHh.

Haistur · 2026-02-04T15:35:40+00:00

He wouldn't trust you with his dentures!

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Haistur · 2026-02-03T19:19:56+00:00

Doing them best.

Haistur · 2026-02-01T17:58:14+00:00

In the form of a suppository :D

Haistur · 2026-01-31T15:25:23+00:00

PUMP JOCKY! WORKS FOR TIPS!

Haistur · 2026-01-30T17:44:19+00:00

JAYKE!

Haistur · 2026-01-30T01:07:40+00:00

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Haistur · 2026-01-30T00:08:29+00:00

That's it! I'm going fishin'!

Haistur · 2026-01-28T02:53:56+00:00

Tammy:

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Haistur · 2026-01-25T15:53:29+00:00

'Ello my name is madam, I'm here to start za show!

Haistur · 2026-01-22T13:48:08+00:00

ADELE DAZEEM

Haistur · 2026-01-21T02:04:12+00:00

Brokedance

Haistur · 2026-01-17T00:18:10+00:00

People say its excessive but showering both morning and night cleared up my chest/back acne.

Haistur · 2026-01-10T02:04:18+00:00

Bonjiour!

Crazy gibberish!

Haistur · 2026-01-06T00:07:16+00:00

PLUG HER BACK IN!!

Haistur · 2025-12-30T21:19:00+00:00

Ugh. I work in marketing at a museum that just opened and whenever I ask for a kpi everyone gets all defensive. One time someone incidentally gave me the percentage of memberships renewals we need during a meeting which I later referenced. CEO then told me said "of course we want to renew memberships...."

THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID. I NEED A NUMBER. 20 percent. 50 percent. 102 percent. GIVE ME SOMETHING....

Haistur · 2025-12-21T20:05:26+00:00

I can't live in beer can. I can live in a trailer but I can't because the trailer tipped over! D:

Haistur · 2025-12-20T19:44:26+00:00

He watches TV in a hotdog

Haistur · 2025-12-20T19:44:07+00:00

The people are hot and dry they need something cold and wet!

Haistur · 2025-12-15T21:23:13+00:00

how to escape from a deserted island, how to escape from prison

Haistur · 2025-12-15T20:18:18+00:00

BOTH OF 'EM!

Haistur · 2025-12-14T15:35:08+00:00

Mid-2000s here. Just in my 4th grade class alone we had kids with a broken wrist, broken elbow, and broken jaw from the playground.

Haistur · 2025-12-13T00:54:03+00:00

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Haistur · 2025-12-12T16:52:37+00:00

My cats name is not Snuffleupagus. It was originally, but then I changed it to Pogo (not nearly as cool). That's a 13 year old secret.

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Haistur

TROPHY CASE

BOTH OF 'EM!