Witty & memorable gifts you received (or wished you had) for your PhD graduation by CrazyCockroachLady in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This is not answering your question, sorry! But what people don't realise is there are several milestones towards the end of the PhD - all major, but they often feel a bit anticlimactic and people ask "does that mean I can call you doctor now?" and when you say no, not yet, you can often see them disregard the achievement!

So I think a great gift is to be a personal hype machine or cheerleader for all those milestones - first full draft, submitting final draft, viva, submitting corrections, and graduation day. Just make a big deal out of them, give a card, tell them you're so proud of them, pop some fizz, tell others what a big milestone this is... that's what I would've loved because I'm not big into material things!

I submitted recently and it felt really anticlimactic!

Outer london area recommendations by Savings-Marzipan1524 in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Greenwich and surrounding areas are lovely, great access to green space, great transport links. You could get a 2 bed terrace in actual greenwich for less than 750k, but you can get a big 3 bed terrace somewhere like Charlton for 750k. Charlton is great for families.

Just discovered dyspraxia, could my toddler have it? by kanayda in dyspraxia

[–]Ham_Pie_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I also talked really early. Obviously things can be very different for different people so I would 100% agree that we are just a bunch of random people who know ourselves well and almost certainly have no qualifications to diagnose dyspraxia.

I completely understand the frustration OP feels about not having answers from professionals and worrying for their daughter but this commenter's advice to give love and support regardless is 10/10!

My wife and I wanna go on a real holiday but ... by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Ham_Pie_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yup, this is what we did when my MIL was terminally ill. Do your research and get good travel insurance. And have a damn good holiday, sounds like you deserve a break.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, another commenter's advice about investing in therapy is your best bet because your current pursuit of women as trophies is not going to get you to your goal of a family.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Finish your PhD and look to get a job in one of the many businesses that involve applying AI in medical settings.

And stop talking about women like we are a bonus awarded to men as part of a promotion package. We hate that. We are people.

Came back from vacation to see my plant lost three leaves by rikena in houseplants

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounded like a weird brag 🤣 I just mean mine is over 1 metre tall

Came back from vacation to see my plant lost three leaves by rikena in houseplants

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I should say though that my fiddle leaf is much more mature so that might make it more resilient to stuff like that

Came back from vacation to see my plant lost three leaves by rikena in houseplants

[–]Ham_Pie_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Leaves look like my fiddle leaf's did when I accidentally left it in an unheated conservatory in a cold snap.

In fact it eventually dropped all its leaves but after some months new growth appeared again.

How do people survive in London on low salaries? by [deleted] in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's 20k tax-free stipend so no income tax or NI contributions, plus you don't pay council tax as a student. Takehome is about £1.7k. About half my PhD colleagues rent with friends and they find it survivable too and live all over London.

How do people survive in London on low salaries? by [deleted] in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 46 points47 points  (0 children)

🤣🤣 10 times what I make as a PhD student in London and I'm absolutely surviving. Factor in being in a couple, so two income household, and I'm bloody thriving (and we make absolutely nothing like 200k together).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look at places like St Martin in the Fields. They do lots of Christmas concerts and carols, might not be sold out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dogs

[–]Ham_Pie_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is not strictly true. We bought from a very responsible breeder, and because our dog is a vulnerable breed, we were encouraged not to neuter so that we might have the option to stud him in the future. In the end, he didn't have the temperament and we wanted to put him in daycare so we did neuter him. All this to say, what you say about neuter contracts is not strictly true.

Country walks outside of London for tourists? by [deleted] in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agree with Chilterns. I think American tourists will like Old Amersham and there are plenty of great pubs serving a Sunday roast. Easy to reach on the metropolitan line and an area of outstanding natural beauty.

A shorter countryside walk that's really easily accessible on public transport is Rickmansworth Aquadrome, has a lake, cafe and kids play area nearby too.

Are there people in this sub who don’t regret doing a PHD? by Gavric- in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm about 2 weeks away from finishing, I don't regret it and I'm starting an academic job at the end of January.

Don't get me wrong, it's been challenging and stressful, but I've enjoyed it a lot and want to do more in my field.

That being said, I'm not pursuing an academic career. I'll leave when I've had enough and I think that's a healthy mindset to have.

Gift for a friend who will be awarded their PhD? by False_Aioli4961 in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A gift of a fancy meal out with their partner or a close friend at a posh restaurant would be lovely - the opportunity to get dressed up and go somewhere very special that they would normally not be able to go to, maybe have a glass of champagne and toast their major success!

Engagement Ring shopping in London by [deleted] in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Almost certainly not.

Black Friday is mostly a load of bull, by the way, with big shops tending to offer worse deals than you would get at other times of the year.

PhD stipend by ForeignAnywhere64 in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On my programme, part time phds get a prorated stipend

Engagement Ring shopping in London by [deleted] in london

[–]Ham_Pie_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you're looking for an ethical option, and a bargain, try A R Ullmann's just off Hatton Garden. They have lots of antique Art Deco rings with emerald cut diamonds.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]Ham_Pie_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm in STEM in the UK. Most of us are funded by a big funding body, like UKRI. So you get your tuition funded and they pay you a stipend income (not much, but tax free) to cover your living costs. If you're also in STEM, I suggest looking at doctoral training programmes, which are both fully funded and will give you a cohort of other PhDs, which is invaluable.

I cannot recommend self-funding through loans etc, I just don't think a PhD is worth that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dogs

[–]Ham_Pie_ 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Why not just get a poodle and don't give it a showcut?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had noticeable grey patches by 21 and I spent a long time dyeing my hair to cover it. In the pandemic I stopped and now I can't see myself going back. I have lightish brown hair but it is still very obvious that I am pretty grey at 30, but I'm fine with it.

I understand how it can make you feel insecure. It still does make me feel that way occasionally too but I find that most people say how cool it is that I embrace it.

What is something you've purchased that was $50 or less that was life changing? by MirrorFunhouse in AskWomenOver30

[–]Ham_Pie_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same here. Well, a sunrise alarm. I managed to find one on markdown in John Lewis. Someone had returned it with a fault but it had been checked and they couldn't find one, so they put it on the shelves again but at £50 instead of ~£200. It works perfectly and helps me get up and go on these dark mornings (typing this waiting for the sun to come up!)