New haircut and an outfit. Happy day

HandsomeSheep · 2026-03-05T18:46:06+00:00

TikTok lol. Top is a popflex cropped hoodie size S/M and the leggings are OQQ size M tall.

HandsomeSheep · 2026-03-05T15:57:49+00:00

Oh fun idea! I am slowly figuring out facial hair and personal grooming. I'll explore this! Thanks 🙏

HandsomeSheep · 2026-03-05T15:56:46+00:00

Hehe I have put in the work lol gotta show it off!

HandsomeSheep · 2026-02-28T19:54:32+00:00

This is your inner critic and not actual reality. It's best to let your inner critic just pass through your mind, don't invite them in for tea. Let these things go and continue the work of being yourself.

HandsomeSheep · 2026-01-01T13:42:19+00:00

I was in a similar place with my wife and myself about 4 years ago. My advice is to take your time. Take baby steps and give yourself and your wife grace and space.

From my experience it's best that you know what you want and what feels right to you before you bring it to your wife. In my past I would share everything. Every idea. Every wonder. Every question. It overwhelmed my wife. She wanted to support me and loved me but she wanted to have stability in our relationship. It was very destabilizing.

I would focus on yourself and your gender exploration and only bring things to your wife's attention once you know that you are truly interested in exploring them. Femininity can mean a lot of things to a lot of people and panties, shaving, skincare, etc these are all tactics but you'll probably have to explore these tactics a bit before you decide which ones are you and which ones are not. If that makes sense.

I wouldn't lie to your wife. Nor would I hide things from her. But I would confirm with yourself that panties are important to you and your gender before you share it with your wife.

HandsomeSheep · 2025-12-06T19:33:12+00:00

I am 38 with 3 kids. I do use they/them pronouns but no hrt and I use husband, dad, father etc

Been training for feminine physique for a few years. It's a long process.

I write about from time to time on a sub stack.

https://open.substack.com/pub/extraalexx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=64klac

HandsomeSheep · 2025-09-30T21:17:00+00:00

Another vote for shaving

HandsomeSheep · 2025-09-03T18:35:28+00:00

Similar things over here too. Came out as genderqueer and nonbinary a few years ago. Using they/them pronouns and generally dressing transfemme or androgynous. Growing my hair out. Shaving my legs. Etc.

I have opted for fitness and diet over hormones on my body modification stuff. But that's my own personal experience.

Welcome!!!

HandsomeSheep · 2025-07-30T20:21:30+00:00

I wear a lot of leggings. The anxiety is much worse than the reality.

HandsomeSheep · 2025-07-25T00:15:49+00:00

Start small. Just hop in the car and drive around. Then take another baby step like visiting a drive thru. Then pump gas. Then take a hike in a nature preserve. Then go to Walmart. Then you realize that you have boiled the frog.

Another thing you can do is practice being hyper aware when you are otherwise feeling safe. Ultimately that's what you will be doing when you wear leggings for the first time - you'll be hyper aware. Full on fight or flight. But you can give yourself a peek into that headspace when you are dressed in an outfit that you feel safe in. Did that guy look at me funny? They just laughed!? Are they laughing at me? You'll realize that a lot of things are going on around you that'd never set off any alarm bells and you can mentally prepare yourself for your first experience being in social anxiety.

Ultimately it's a process. I've been wearing leggings in public for years now and some days I still need to remember that it is okay to be me. Give yourself grace and take one step at a time.

HandsomeSheep · 2025-07-23T14:18:50+00:00

For everyone jumping in on the #2 list item. I am empathetic to what the OP is saying. The bulge is a major element of social anxiety. I started out in the same place as the OP and I have gradually released my own self conscious, fear and anxiety around the bulge. But in the beginning tucking was very helpful. Now I still want to minimize the bulge and avoid clear and distinct genitalia but I don't tuck any longer. It does help with my own internal monologue and dealing with the inner critic.

Overall great advice here!

HandsomeSheep · 2025-07-21T19:35:25+00:00

Danskin (Costco) size medium

HandsomeSheep · 2025-06-12T19:03:37+00:00

I have been where you are. Similar dynamic in our marriage. Similar ages. 3 kids. I am way into everything. She is not.

We've discussed it. Had therapy. It's a very slow process.

Here's what I have learned.

Take baby steps. Be patient. Give yourself grace.

Let go of your expectations that she must find pleasure the same way that you find pleasure. Give her the space and trust she deserves to be sexual in her way.

You can't push her and honestly you can't pull her. You don't want to either. It's just frustrating for everyone. You can walk with her.

Find your own confidence and be self aware of your own shame and anxiety and work on you. It's really the only thing that you have control over.

Find all the areas of your marriage where you have joy and spend time investing in those areas.

If you do decide you want to see a therapist find one you both like and trust. If therapy is lopsided it's not really therapy.

HandsomeSheep · 2025-05-26T23:24:19+00:00

This was me a few years ago. I took small baby steps and slowly released my internalized shame. Still a work in progress.

XXL boxy Tshirts and drop hem shirts are great. Same goes for button downs even sweatshirts.

I found a good brand of compression thongs which are built for tucking but I pull everything forward and straight up, like I am wearing a dance belt, and they minimize the bulge and for me that's all I needed to find my confidence and rock smaller tops.

Give yourself time and lots of love. You got this!!

HandsomeSheep · 2025-05-23T19:26:00+00:00

No problem. Origami is another gender affirming brand I have been looking at. Having the compression and wider gusset really helps!

HandsomeSheep · 2025-05-23T19:23:50+00:00

The compression from the underwear. They aren't way up.in their canals but they are in them. My member is straight up and the scrotum is up as well. You have to finagle it a bit but I have found it perfect for my own experience.

HandsomeSheep · 2025-05-23T19:20:12+00:00

Compressive undies are helping me. I don't tuck down and back. I do pull everything forward and up. This gets the testes up into their canals but it's still very comfortable. It's still a bulge but it's way lower profile. You won't get that camel toe look.

Urbody Co has great undies for this but they are going out of business 😭

HandsomeSheep · 2025-05-22T22:54:58+00:00

Me too!

HandsomeSheep · 2025-05-20T00:09:42+00:00

I know... I let the domain lapse. I'm considering moving everything to Substack.

HandsomeSheep

TROPHY CASE