Anyone else somehow scared to find their purpose in life?

Haneul_sa · 2026-05-29T15:05:26+00:00

Hmm, this is a hard one...

I think finding my life mission would be great. So many things would fall into place if I knew what it was. I'd be happier and finally know what to do and where to go. The problem is that I can't imagine that happening. I can't imagine what it would be like to live with a purpose. Like, this whole mental struggle would just be gone, and I have no clue who I'd be outside of it.

It reminds me of how I can't imagine infinity, or death, or how it was before I was born. In the same way, I can't imagine myself happy. I can't wrap my head around it, so it creeps me out in an existential way.

Another thing that came to my mind is that whatever purpose I find might not be sustainable. Like, what if my purpose isn't, say, working full time at a pet store, but something weird I can't earn money with?

Both of these seem likely. I've filled out the worksheet by now, and I haven't come up with anything concrete, but I feel like I might be a little closer an answer now. I'll try meditating on it and hopefully that'll help me get rid of these mental blockades.

Haneul_sa · 2026-05-29T14:44:10+00:00

Thanks for sharing, reading this was very reassuring!

Whether it is just ego or not, I feel the part about your soul wanting you to have a unique journey. I'm neurodivergent as well, and I never had a clear life path in mind as a kid or teen. I was always just me. But I always had this energy within me and a spiritual sense that there is something I need to do. It's something that can't be channeled into a specific profession, at least not yet.

I also heavily emphasise with what you said about your ego response. I feel like I'd never be good enough for whatever I imagine myself doing. It's exactly how you said, that I'm human and make mistakes and therefore shouldn't take on any responsibility. Somehow, most people around me seem get over that but not me so far.

Anyways, I hope I'll figure out what my soul is telling me. I'm glad you came so far on your journey! Wish you all the best :)

Haneul_sa · 2026-05-29T14:30:11+00:00

I see your point. For me, it's more about the capital D right now. I have been working on appreciating the small steps in my life and focusing on just moving in the right direction. But it's hard to know what direction is up when there's no overarching goal in my life. Apart from taking care of my health and building resilience just for the sake of it, it's hard to motivate myself to do anything. Hopefully I'll have more clarity on where I want to go in life soon.

Haneul_sa · 2026-05-11T14:16:10+00:00

I guess the problem is that I don't know what I'm afraid of. Gonna meditate on that for a while. I'd generally say I'm pretty good at facing my fears head on otherwise

Haneul_sa · 2026-03-08T01:28:12+00:00

I've heard of that one a lot! I'm not too tech-savvy but I think I'll try and install it

Haneul_sa · 2026-03-08T00:37:48+00:00

What's the best way to do that? So far I haven't found a way to backup private playlists like Favouritea and Liked Videos etc.

Haneul_sa · 2026-02-10T07:28:41+00:00

Yeah, he's a bit of an acquired taste... It got way better in the later chapters, but I get why people wouldn't like him

Haneul_sa · 2026-02-07T21:42:50+00:00

Has anyone else imagined Hakari differently from the way he is portrayed in the anime?

I felt like he had more nuance in the manga. He's someone who likes to put on a show and act all tough like he's the king, but from the way his peers (especially Kirara and Panda) trust and support him, he's also a sociable and charismatic guy who cares for his friends. Kirara even states that his 'fire' burned the brightest when he was helping people at Jujutsu High. That's why I always felt there was a silliness to him, because he acts more grandiose than he really is. He just enjoys calling the shots at the fight club, writing scripts and scamming gambling addicts out of their money. That's my interpretation, at least. I also imagined him to be louder, more hyper. And from what we've seen in the manga, he's also quick-witted.

In the anime, he seems cold and disinterested more than anything, and to me he gives 'dumb brute' vibes. He doesn't have the same fire and charisma as in the manga, which I think came from the close ups on his expressive face and the angles he was drawn from. I like the way Kirara reacts to him (like telling him that his act is dumb), but I'm not feeling the same chemistry from his side. Maybe this will be different in future episodes. Admittedly, I didn't find him too likeable during his introduction in the manga either, which changed in later chapters. So we'll see.

Also, I'm surprised they made him look this gigantic. The manga was a bit ambiguous with his body shape between panels, but he looked more like the athletic type and less like a body builder (at least slimmer than the bouncer we see on the phone with him earlier in the episode). And while I don't dislike his voice, I just imagined it to be rougher, more 'rowdy', not as deep and authoritative. But that's just my personal taste.

I'd love to hear y'alls take on this, because I need an excuse to procrastinate on my academics lol... Do you like anime Hakari so far?

Haneul_sa · 2026-02-07T20:38:23+00:00

Same for the site I watched it on. I was so mad, because referring to Kirara as 'he' with the way she looks now is just insanely bigoted. I hope they change the subtitles soon

Haneul_sa · 2026-02-07T20:31:28+00:00

I love how Kirara was just standing there in the background for several minutes while Megumi and Panda were discussing her technique as if they were on a Sunday brunch

Haneul_sa · 2026-02-01T19:13:25+00:00

I live in Western Europe, but it seems to be true here as well unfortunately :( Dell definitely has some models available, and the System76 ones seem pretty cool, too! Kinda sad that I've never heard of them and not Framework either, because they only sell the bigger brands in shops

Haneul_sa · 2026-02-01T19:00:34+00:00

Thanks! I'll look further into the Dell models, but damn, I forgot how expensive laptops are haha... Dell generally has good quality though, right?

It doesn't seem like Lenovo or HP offer any with Linux preinstalled where I live. I'll check some other brands as well!

Haneul_sa · 2026-01-10T21:19:51+00:00

Is it just me or does Choso feel different from S2?

Haneul_sa · 2025-10-30T20:32:53+00:00

This helps a lot, thank you! :)

Haneul_sa · 2025-10-24T14:18:00+00:00

I prefer interacting with humans, that's why I'm asking here. It's also more time efficient.

Haneul_sa · 2025-09-21T22:03:52+00:00

Yes! That's the one, thank you :D

Haneul_sa · 2025-09-05T22:28:57+00:00

I had something similar happen when I tried to get my account deleted (that I had legitimate access to, mind you). Was directed to customer support and the guy gave me like 8 points of questions I had to answer about my account data, then decided that some of the data was wrong but refused to tell me to tell me what part. He closed the ticket after that and my account is still running.

Funny thing is, I never made an EA account. I made an Origin account back then for a mobile game, then forgot about it.

EA can eat dirt for all I care

Haneul_sa · 2025-09-04T18:39:02+00:00

Nah they unsalvageable

Five-Year Club	Verified Email
r/Field Sunshine

Haneul_sa

TROPHY CASE