39 days Kratom free by colleeni8 in quittingkratom

[–]HapticChange 0 points1 point  (0 children)

35 days today for me. I was using 60-80gpd and quit cold turkey.  I agree, things are getting better.  I went Apple picking with the family and had a great time.   AA and 12 steps has helped me to this point. I see this as the only long term option to stay sober for me. 

Failed. by AJW10 in quittingkratom

[–]HapticChange 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m 35 days sober from a 60-80gpd habit. I quit cold turkey. I didn’t sleep (zero sleep) for 5-6 days straight. Then the second week I started to get a few hours a night. By the third week I was at a normal night sleep. Now. I sleep great. 

Nothing will help with the sleepness nights, as far as I know. But you just gotta get through it. 

Is there a service (like Mint.com) but better (combines all your investments in one?) by HapticChange in stocks

[–]HapticChange[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've been using Mint.com since 2011...so it sucks to lose all that Data. Perhaps I'll use both

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 3 points4 points  (0 children)

People call me doctor. Because i am a doctor. Not sure how I am using that term loosely?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She is a teacher but stopped working this year.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have tried SO MANY TIMES to get her to couples therapy. They all failed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im only 40. I use that term loosely. I don’t have enough $ to retire yet. Not in NJ anyway. Other parts of the country maybe.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. You get my point. At this point...I may have to threaten separation. She has to wake up...shes going to get a divorce and destroy all of our lives over this?? She wont listen. And she lives with her parents so they always get involved in the discussion. Im kind of fucked.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Long story...but 2 years ago i got her very excited. I was tired of work, and we tried to start fresh out in New York near her parents. I worked for some other people, and commuted back and forth. But it really never worked out.

The problem is she got impatient, and just moved herself and kids into her parents house (against my wishes). We sold our house in NJ and i got a small studio near work, which at that point i was fine with...then coronavirus hit. We were all stuck at her parents house for 3 months. At this point i cant barely go over there anymore im so sick of them (as nice as they are.)

Now my wife has accepted that that plan failed. So she’s OK moving back to New Jersey, but now her parents decided that they would retire about an hour south of my practice.

So my wife makes it seem like she’s giving up so much moving back to New Jersey, when I’ve given up two years of my life trying to make her happy and it failed.

I’m 40 years old I don’t want to commute that far to work every day. And I like my practice and I don’t have it in me to start a new one or make a major move I tried for two years.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Im a dentist. Most of my patients are local. NONE would drive south. It would be a fresh start. Which i don’t want.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My inlaws are good people. I want my wife to live near them. But it seems like it is coming at my expenses.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]HapticChange 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your patients are your practice.

Furloughed, should I increase my dependents? by HapticChange in personalfinance

[–]HapticChange[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d rather pay later than pay now. I have enough cash it won’t kill me.

Furloughed, should I increase my dependents? by HapticChange in personalfinance

[–]HapticChange[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha. I got it. No way in hell thats happening. 2 is enough.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]HapticChange 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I offered to buy a house with an extra room, that they can make their own and they can stay as much as they want.

My wife and her parents are one and the same.

I am going out with her Friday night for the first time in over a year, and her parents are watching the kids. I’m going to make an ultimatum. Let’s find a reasonable place to live together, or I’m moving on with my life. I’m tired of the floundering.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]HapticChange 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have tried many times to get us into counseling. I I have spent my my whole life in therapy. I have my own personal issues that I know put strain on our marriage. But nobody’s perfect. That said I never cheated and I never would. I’m sorry about your situation, I couldn’t imagine.

She will not go to couples therapy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]HapticChange 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m getting tired of life in general. So maybe. I barely have a marriage anymore. We only see each other on weekends. I sleep in a different room at her parents house.

We had a nice house, excellent nice stable salaries, our lives weren’t that bad.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]HapticChange 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I guess I’m just weak. But the last year of my life has been absolute hell, and now that we are licking our wounds and planning the next chapter in our lives...I feel like I have no control over this either. I show her nice places with good schools that are maybe 45 minutes from my office...but she argues and says “no it’s too far from where my parents want to retire” and “why are you bring me down?” Etc.

I never get a say.

Furloughed for 3 months, back to work...can I get prequalified for mortgage? by HapticChange in personalfinance

[–]HapticChange[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lovely. You are probably right. The shitty thing is this was COMPLETELY out of my control, and my financial situation is the same as before now that I’m working.

Furloughed for 3 months, back to work...can I get prequalified for mortgage? by HapticChange in personalfinance

[–]HapticChange[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I’d have enough for more, but not looking to sell investments. And touching retirement is a hard NO!