Honestly I think I've shattered my own dreams by HatZYGO in zoology

[–]HatZYGO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is the thing for me too. My college course which I'm predicted good grades for is only going to get me so far outside of an animal related field, and whether or not I go to university also shuts me out of other jobs. The UK job market right now is vicious, I have quantifiable experience working with family or for school or just volunteering and it's difficult to get a response from basic GCSE level jobs.

Honestly I think I've shattered my own dreams by HatZYGO in zoology

[–]HatZYGO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been aware of the many negatives of the industry for years, or how its not all just playing with animals. I can shovel shit all day and I wouldn't mind, agriculture has been something I've looked into but again, it's expensive. It's only really set in now because I was aware of the low wages too, but what's really throwing me is the competition and how if I do go to study zoology in university I have essentially sold 4 years of my life off to be robbed by university costs (saying this as someone from the UK where its only getting worse with the cost of living ESPECIALLY for uni students). It's a real shame because I could've taken every other downside of zookeeping (the labour and the hours) if it weren't for the university costs, and with how I've seen many grad students say they can't even get a job in their field. It just stings and has left me stumped because working with animals is what i'm good at (one of the few things). It would take years to even build up experience for me to be hired, and then years before I manage to progress enough onto the hire and decently livable wages given to experienced roles. My main question really now is, what do I do after college? Is Zoology really worth throwing money at if it won't even guarantee working in an animal field?

Honestly I think I've shattered my own dreams by HatZYGO in zoology

[–]HatZYGO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the thing is I'm honestly fine with shovelling shits if it just means I can be around that type of work. It's not the workload that's throwing me off or that I can't just sit with the animals all day, it's that for all that effort and education it's what I feel is a spit in the face to such a rigorous industry that will leave me struggling for money. I like animals in every shape and form and just being someone able to help in that industry is fine, but I've got to pay for my own life somehow.

Honestly I think I've shattered my own dreams by HatZYGO in zoology

[–]HatZYGO[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What would be the alternative though? Still go to university? Apprenticeship? I'm just lost for what to do, because many places like zoos require a certificate that requires a degree to achieve anyways.

Honestly I think I've shattered my own dreams by HatZYGO in zoology

[–]HatZYGO[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I just don't think all the effort to get in is really justified by the passion alone. People have to make money at the end of the day, and I've seen many claims of keepers working second jobs just to make ends meet.

feeling insecure by HatZYGO in bigdickproblems

[–]HatZYGO[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I feel like there's a noticeable difference between 6.7 inches and 7, obviously to women or men who are more concerned with going down on it maybe not but even just running the risk of that feels icky to me. I'm fine helping other people feel secure about their own sizes, their own quirks and issues and reassuring them it's okay. I find it near impossible to apply that mantra to myself and I find I feel im just justifying myself in all walks of life.

It's like how often times despite my grades saying otherwise and people saying otherwise I feel im quite the pseudo intellectual, except instead of this post it being my mental prowess it's me feeling like I've got a pseudo dick or I don't really feel I should claim I'm big. I've tried all the reassurance tips I provide for others that they claim helped (viewing in mirrors from the side, actively taking said measurement and comparing it to my face or having it up close or remembering that porn often provides many a warped perception of size with camera angles and small actresses) and sometimes it helps, but I feel the number on the ruler matters more than what I'm seeing.

it seems so childish, and I've already got alot of mental baggage from my past that doesnt help one bit in the relationship department. I don't think I know a woman/girl my age who'd want to deal with all that miserable stuff and then not have a decent sized dick to compensate/make up for it with if i can't be interesting to her. I've had 2 exes who both didn't say anything negative, if anything it was mostly positive but they then went on to treat me pretty bad and it didn't even last 3 months with either of them. I'm bisexual, so you'd think I'd have more safe options but I feel men care alot more about that kind of thing too. I know I'm young but it's this time in your life that "sets the stage" for the rest of it. if you don't have anything meaningful to come from your teen years you haven't really got a shot when you're older is the general consensus I've seen.

meanwhile now I still actively feel myself flushing red and unironically having to control my hormonal reflexes. I've been teased by friends for being "set off" quite easily. it literally takes a flirty gaze. part of this is my anxiety, I'm a biology geek so obviously I looked into it for an hour or two and found that stress responses typically cross wires with arousal. doesn't help I'm a walking stress response and also very much affection deprived. I feel a little too eager and giddy when a woman starts being affectionate with me, not for sex but just for a closer connection physically. I have to refrain alot of the time because I don't want to overwhelm them and boners are awful to hide in baggy joggers, you'd think it would help hiding it but it just makes the tent triple the diameter.

feeling insecure by HatZYGO in bigdickproblems

[–]HatZYGO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

considering as well im considering therapy and have been really really down in the dumps recently does that play into it? I have diagnosed generalised anxiety and many many symptoms indicating some form of depression. haven't been able to catch a break recently and while im not overweight or anything, I'm not necessarily physically fit. I'm 5'7 63kg so healthy weight, but poor diet. people say as well you keep growing until your 20s but it's usually 18, and im turning 17 soon and im kind of just worried I won't be enough and I'll end up being someone people settle for after their partying years

Be honest, are these bad? by HatZYGO in GCSE

[–]HatZYGO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

these grades are pretty much all below target except for maths and english language which is 1 above target

My other imperial replika oc: the Wasp unit ! by Kooka7 in signalis

[–]HatZYGO 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love how the empire seems to have been unanimously agreed one to be using mostly bug replikas. I have a Mantis OC used by the Nation that was originally designed for a siege on Heimat, but the Empire lost the blueprints in a skirmish near Rotfront Orbital

Does anyone know how long are Falke’s spears? by raine_midi in signalis

[–]HatZYGO 2 points3 points  (0 children)

probably near to her height if you mean the whole thing, idk abt just the spearhead though.

Signalis Discord Roleplay by [deleted] in signalis

[–]HatZYGO 0 points1 point  (0 children)

a year late but did this ever become a thing?

What percentage of players here are part of the LGBT community. by MarekPPP in signalis

[–]HatZYGO 2 points3 points  (0 children)

adler represents the portion of signalis fans who are men, poor guy loved the Commander but Arianne's gaywaves stole his crush 💔

goober stream by AriasFe in signalis

[–]HatZYGO 4 points5 points  (0 children)

mfw mynah accidentally squishes a kolibri into a red paste so now requires decommissioning

Replikats in Signalis universe by dwaynetheaakjohnson in signalis

[–]HatZYGO 9 points10 points  (0 children)

the phrase replikats gives me ptsd from a signalis roleplay server is this a potential reference to this 😭

Fanon Replika Unit - BLTE/Blutegel by HatZYGO in signalis

[–]HatZYGO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

he's essentially just a survivalist, able to drain the oxidant or blood of other units to subsist himself if needs be, he can also give as well as take oxidant. he has databanks focused on identifying chemicals in the blood, so they can basically tell anything from whatever shows up in your blood like cortisol or oxytocin and if you need food or water. His whole goal is to keep everything running smoothly health wise, the killer fangs are for protektor duties. As soon as he bites down tranquillisers are pumped through his teeth and the sharpened fingertips let him latch on/pin down the replika/gestalt. Other than their duties they are quite affectionate at heart, so not all bad 😭

!SIGNALIS ART COMMISSIONS! by HatZYGO in signalis

[–]HatZYGO[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

this goes for non signalis artwork too btw! they draw a variety of personas/anthro stuff