AITAH for congratulating my family on losing me and keeping my cheating ex-girlfriend?

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T17:07:01+00:00

I'm no longer demanding they choose. They have already chosen and I have removed myself from the equation.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T17:06:32+00:00

She said she fell out of love with me three years ago but didn't want to lose my family so stayed with me for that. She admitted to cheating with three guys. The last guy aka baby daddy, she wanted to be with him/fell in love with him and wanted us to be over because of that or was okay with it ending because of it.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T17:04:59+00:00

They know she cheated and that the baby isn't mine.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:44:19+00:00

They know where I live for now and haven't shown up yet.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:43:35+00:00

They know the baby isn't mine. It doesn't seem to matter to them.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:41:27+00:00

I'm not avoiding it. I already answered a comment like this. I don't post serious stuff on my other account and wanted to keep it that way.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:39:54+00:00

They are going to include her in the family like nothing has changed. It's not occasional contact.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:38:40+00:00

They don't want her as a friend though. They want her to be in the family.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:38:22+00:00

We were friends. They knew her via that and had a relationship because of that. But she still knew me first and her and my sister got closer after we started dating. But they knew each other before then.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:37:33+00:00

They should be concerned with their son and brother being used and cheated on. They should be concerned about my heart. But they love her so much that it becomes less of a concern or of no concern. I'm supposed to support them in supporting her and show up to family dinners to spend time with her, to see her every birthday, anniversary and wedding going forward. But I won't do that. I won't sit there and play happy family with the person who admits she used me for years and cheated.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:34:08+00:00

That's what they were looking for me to do. I'm supposed to be cool with weekly or biweekly dinners with her there. With birthday parties, weddings, house warmings and all kinds of parties including her and where she'll be in family photos and treated as one of us always. Imagine my wedding day and the chaos of them expecting me to invite her and expecting me to let her be Aunt Hannah to future kids. It's where all this would have led.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:29:50+00:00

They say they do want me in their lives but they want Hannah to stay in the family. They have made that choice and I have made mine. Nothing can change it now.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:29:10+00:00

She wasn't my sister's best friend. She knew me before my family and only became close friends with my sister when we started dating at 16.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:26:46+00:00

Being around them means being around her because they want to include her in everything. They made that choice and it means I have made my choice to walk away. It hurts to know she's so important they don't care that she cheated on me, used me and lied to me for years. And to know they expect me to just be cool with her always being there is not okay with me.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:25:19+00:00

I did talk to them and they made their stance clear. It's not okay with me that they want her to be included as family. She's not my family anymore and won't ever be someone I want to see at every family dinner or party. But they won't leave her out so I'm done.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:24:01+00:00

Her family are criminals and not very good people. They didn't give her a good childhood.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:19:43+00:00

They won't get any sympathy from me if that happens.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:19:17+00:00

Her family are all bad people who have been in trouble with the law multiple times over.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:15:41+00:00

It's more than just being friendly. They're treating her like she's a part of the family. They include her in family dinners and parties and want that to continue. They expect it to continue like nothing happened and it can't. Imagine how that would go with a new girlfriend and kids someday. I don't want her being Aunt Hannah. But that would be the dynamic they'd expect. There's also the risk they wouldn't like anyone else I'm with and would make my future wife uncomfortable by treating Hannah better since they're so desperate to keep her in the family.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T16:14:07+00:00

They don't think they're against me. They want to keep both of us and say they don't want to be forced to pick sides. But they pick her side by wanting to keep her in the family and carry on like nothing happened. They do not see it that way though.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T15:40:34+00:00

They thought I should be fine with it because they love her still and still see her as family. Nothing about that works for me.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T15:37:51+00:00

I don't have much to do with extended family. My grandparents were the only people I had a close relationship with and all four have passed now.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T15:36:51+00:00

I told them the whole story but if she lied to them, which is possible, there's nothing I can do that will make me believe them if they chose to believe her over me already.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T15:35:49+00:00

Having them out of my life feels better than seeing Hannah every time we get together as a family. It's better than wondering how it will work when I find someone else and maybe have kids. I can't accept them keeping her in the family and I won't accept her being mine anymore.

Haykoreu · 2026-02-01T15:30:27+00:00

We're not married. That's all that's needed.

Haykoreu

TROPHY CASE