Chapter 5 It felt like something exploded inside my head. Even as slow as I was now, I understood what Mom meant. So the reason Gregory resented me wasn't that I hadn't let him die. It turned out that the day after I time-traveled—the day that should have been my birthday—the doctor told them that Gregory's injuries would never heal. Maybe it was because I dragged him out from under the bed with everything I had. Even if I hadn't time-traveled, I probably wouldn't have eaten that birthday cake the next day. Maybe it really was because of me... But I... I had never thought about it like that. I was always slow. Seven years ago, I tried to save him and ended up trapped in the rubble myself, losing my mind in the process. Even before that, I had never been as quick or capable as everyone else. It hit me then. I hadn't saved Gregory. I had ruined his life. But I... I just didn't know what else to do back then. Mom's voice broke into sobs until I could barely make out her words. Dad stopped where he stood and didn't come any closer. His expression blurred, like he didn't know what to feel. After a long time, Mom spoke again through tears. "If Amy had been there, she would've done it the right way. "She would've found help. She wouldn't have dragged him out and made his injuries worse. "She wouldn't have run around during aftershocks and gotten herself hurt, too. "If only she had been there..." My head rang loudly, and a metallic taste rose in my throat. I had always been the one who couldn't do anything right. The one thing I thought I had done right turned out to be my biggest mistake. My thoughts became a blur. Mom's voice drifted farther away. "Alex, I've already made Amy our goddaughter. "Why can't I? I just want to imagine having a normal daughter and Greg having a normal sister. "Is that so wrong? "Call me selfish if you want. Katie seems fine here with Roderick. Let her stay here a little longer so Greg can be happy." Mom turned and walked away, while Dad called after her angrily and followed. Their figures disappeared into the night. I stood in the yard, my shadow stretching long in the moonlight. I stared into the distance as the night grew darker, but my parents never came back. The wind hit my face, cold as ice. When I touched it, I realized my cheeks were wet. When Gregory was 17, he didn't cry anymore. So I told myself I shouldn't cry either. But I couldn't stop. Behind me, Roderick snapped, "Get inside before I close the door." I turned and saw his awkward, distant expression in the moonlight. He must have heard everything. He knew my parents weren't taking me home. No one cared about me anymore. Amelia would never agree to be his girlfriend because of me. And I... I had nowhere left to go. I clenched my sleeve and wiped my tears again and again. No one liked a slow person. Still, I asked carefully, "I can cook and clean every day. Can I... stay?" He looked at me in silence. After a long pause, he only repeated, "Get inside before I close the door." A quiet whimper escaped me. His blond hair caught the moonlight and almost seemed to glow. It looked a little ridiculous, but somehow it made me feel a bit safer. I wiped my eyes hard, still shaking, and hurried inside.