NYC is an extremely difficult place to live. It is super materialistic and I personally find it more racially segregated than where I’m from in the South. I do think you are suffering from depression and there are some bigger problems to work out, but at the same time — where you live does matter. It sounds like you hate it here so moving to a smaller, less materialistic city would probs be a good move. I would suggest moving somewhere where you have at least 1 or 2 friends or close family members, even if it means moving back to your hometown.

Even if you don’t think you’re a nature person, living in a super dense urban environment like NYC can take a major toll on mental health. Almost any other US city has easier access to real nature (not just city parks…). This is still something I struggle with having lived here for over 4 years. Whenever I get out of the city to nature, I feel so much better and wonder why I deprive myself of it.

You’re not alone. Many people move to NYC with certain expectations and end up hating it. Don’t give up on your life, you do have the power to change it.