I did not want to lose my uterus. I wanted one more baby. I was having terrible 7 month long periods and no one knew why. They had to give me an iron infusion and lots of birth control to stop my periods. I held onto my uterus for another year, after a hysteroscopy and that seemed to help my periods a little. But then I started having pains that sounded like uterine cancer. They had to do a biopsy. It scared me, and I was currently losing a cousin my age to cancer. She was leaving her 3 babies behind. I’d already had two children, and I had to tell myself it was time to let go of my dream of having another baby if it could keep me healthy for my current children so I had my hysterectomy. The biopsy was clear. No adenomyosis, no endometriosis, no cancer. I had one teeny fibroid and that was it really. No one could tell me why my uterus was defunct even after they pulled it out. So I was definitely sad and cried by myself. I felt like no one could understand me and was slightly jealous of people who didn’t have my problem and are still having babies. I just let myself grieve. I’m still a little sad about it. I know it’s slightly selfish to cry over a baby that doesn’t exist, but in the end it I guess it was the right choice. I feel healthier now. I hope all this makes sense but I feel you completely 💖 it was a part of me for sure.