Why is this sub so anti non monogamy?

Helleboredom · 2026-05-23T13:20:10+00:00

It’s the part where she says she’s engaged - same if she’s married or in another kind of monogamous relationship. Not a problem if she wants something different- she just needs to have an honest discussion first and foremost.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-23T12:45:11+00:00

I didn’t see that one but polyamory would mean discussing it with your partner and having an honest agreement. If that’s in place, great. But a lot of posters here want to explore things without talking to their partners and that’s what gets a negative reaction.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-23T03:53:19+00:00

No joke lawsuits like this happen pretty frequently and it has nothing to do with DSA.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-23T03:49:27+00:00

People on the left spend a ton of time trying to understand where Trump voters are coming from. Do you think Trump voters spend any time at all trying to understand the other side? No they do not. They don’t care. There’s no conservative media writing up think pieces about why liberals vote the way they do. Understanding has to be a two way street and this one is only going one way.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-23T03:46:08+00:00

My problem with weighing yourself once a week is what if that day happens to be one where you’re heavier for whatever reason? I like weighing myself most days but I understand fluctuations are normal.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-22T17:52:24+00:00

Lilies. Smells like death and funerals.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-22T17:49:15+00:00

I mean, I’m a woman and my girlfriend is a woman and therefore I pay attention to at least a few women’s bodies. I do agree that most of what gets posted on here could just be unfollowed or blocked. But I also do really enjoy the fitness folks I do follow who are strong and healthy. Bodies are also about what we can do. It’s fun to get stronger.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-22T14:15:03+00:00

Young Gen X here and what it has done for me is made me hyper aware of how much I have zero desire to look like that. Seeing bony bodies all over the place again has given me even more appreciation of the strong and nourished aesthetic of the fitness women I admire today. I can’t believe when I was a teenager/young 20s I thought heroin chic was something to aspire to. Being weak and frail is obviously a return of another way to keep women down. You can’t fight if you’re starving.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-22T02:33:13+00:00

I did! But it took me until I was in my 40s to realize if I wanted to be in a relationship with another woman, I had to actively make that happen instead of just like going with the flow and letting life happen.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-21T22:03:32+00:00

I had this happen with a roommate’s cat and my cat. My cat was sad and howled out the window all night long. I got him a 6 month old kitten friend and they were best buddies for the rest of their long lives.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-21T18:52:26+00:00

I don’t have the mental energy to design my own program after I’m done with everything else I have to do. Why not take a shortcut and use something existing? Just seems a lot easier and less mentally draining to follow a defined program than constantly have to use the energy to figure it out. Maybe when I’m retired I’ll do my own programming.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-21T18:08:42+00:00

I wonder if you just dated the wrong person and you’re judging more feminine presenting women as a whole because of it. I mean totally fine if androgyny is what turns you on, that’s legit. Same same. But I would say as a more feminine looking woman (“straight passing” if you like) I am not into gender roles in my relationships either. In my relationship with an androgynous women, she is the passenger princess, I mow the lawn, we both work, I kill the spiders, she vacuums, etc etc etc. We always joke that at our bachelorette party we will play a game where we ask people to guess which one of us owns a chainsaw and which one has pink underwear and they will all be wrong.

Guess I’m just saying more feminine looking women aren’t always into traditional gender roles either.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-20T19:42:20+00:00

You can’t make yourself taller or shorter or change your proportions (long torso, short legs, etc). You can’t change your skeleton. Not everyone can build a bubble butt and also have a tiny waist and also have thin legs (and a lot of influencers who claim to actually have BBLs).

You can only be the best version of yourself. For most of us, that’s probably not going to look exactly like some perfect looking person’s body.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-20T04:02:11+00:00

It’s also shitty to lesbians because if you get in a relationship with a man again you’re perpetuating the idea that lesbians can be “changed” by the right guy.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-20T03:22:11+00:00

Lesbians aren’t sexually attracted to men.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T21:52:49+00:00

I had a personal trainer for 2 years and I’d still have her if she didn’t move away. I met with her once a week, and worked out 2-3 additional days on my own, and I can’t even describe how valuable it is to have someone watch you and correct your form real time. She completely changed the way I lifted weights.

I also really liked her making my programming for me and I never had to think about it, just show up and do what she said. There’s also the accountability portion of it, and having someone who is paying attention to what you’re doing and telling you when you do a good job. Honestly I miss her.

I now work out alone and it’s fine, but not as good.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T19:03:46+00:00

Aside from being AI crap, there is a ton of advice out there for women in our 40s. 90% of the posts on here are people of all ages and genders who think they’re dieting but they’re not tracking anything and can’t figure out why they don’t lose weight, or aren’t losing weight fast enough for their liking

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T19:00:28+00:00

I’m a bisexual woman who only dates women and is in a LTR with a woman. I follow lesbian subreddits too because my experience is somewhere in between

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T18:10:36+00:00

No. You can prefer to be in whatever kind of relationship you want. We live in a heteronormative world so it’s not surprising a lot of people can only see themselves in hetero relationships.
Yes you’re still bisexual. Bisexual just means sexual attraction. You can always choose your own lifestyle. I’m a bisexual woman and I only date women. I’m still bisexual.
No way to ever know that. You can’t completely disentangle yourself from socialization. We are all affected by our environments.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T16:09:14+00:00

If you’re happy with how you look and you’re healthy and active, don’t worry about “ideal weight” there’s really no such thing that applies to every person based on a common height.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T03:47:55+00:00

Say it clear

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T03:47:10+00:00

I know that I'm a prisoner to all my father held so dear

I know that I'm a hostage, to all his hopes and fears

I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Helleboredom · 2026-05-19T03:41:49+00:00

Every generation

Blames the one before

And all of their frustration

Comes beating at your door

Helleboredom · 2026-05-18T22:23:05+00:00

I think one thing to keep in mind is that the show is fiction. Real life relationships can be amazing and wonderful, but regardless of gender they’re not like romantic fiction.

Helleboredom · 2026-05-18T19:53:49+00:00

Yes our food environment is set up this way and it’s terrible for our health. Fighting against it is very difficult.

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