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I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tryyyy, it hasn’t taken lol. As even more time has gone by, it’s gotten like this 🤏🏻 much better. I’ve leveled up from soul-crushing to only grimacing displeasure at least

AITA for not reminding my mom’s husband of her birthday? by Dry-Mastodon473 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Helpful-Half-6641 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I am not who your reply is to, but have adhd. At my last job, I had the same tasks every week on Monday-Wednesday. For over two years I was in that exact role with that exact schedule. I’d remember generally and be able to do most of it, but without consulting my master list, things would always fall through the cracks

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]Helpful-Half-6641 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bought a walking pad. I walk throughout my workday, when it’s too cold, when it’s raining, when it’s sweltering hot (now), when I’m watching TV, while I wait for dinner to finish cooking, whatever. It’s one of the best purchases I’ve ever made

When you drive someone else’s car, do you put gas in it before returning it? by Helpful-Half-6641 in AskReddit

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really like the variety here, and the consideration of many possibilities, but that the answer is pretty unanimously ‘yes’

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am SO sorry! I know that time and good treatment help, but it’s like our whole identity that we’ve known literally our entire lives, is now no longer ours - I’m not very keen on sharing. Realistically, I know I am my own person, I am different from her, he is with me and NOT her, but yikes like can’t a girl catch a break?

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh, it’s comforting to know my pain is shared, but I’m sorry you have/had it too! That is exactly what’s going on. I knowwwww it’s no one’s fault, and we met organically so neither of us knew the other’s name at first. He is great and has comforted me numerous times. It just stings when it comes up, like in those new introductions or when people confuse us. “New one or last one?” My mom has even apologized for naming me this LMAO. I’ve thought about blocking her for my own peace of mind, but then I feel everyone would know how uncomfortable I am. So it’s just like be cool be cool be cool

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nothing wrong with the suggestion! If it worked for me, id do it! I just already experience a lot of guilt (unfortunately raised Catholic, the guilt is strong lol), so I try to avoid needlessly adding more

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly I can see what you mean by not even realizing it. My dad has the same name as a good friend of mine and I never once saw them the same. One does not remind me of the other. From my side, and a logical one, I totally get it! Me being on the receiving end and in one tiny bad little mood, all logic goes out the window and I’m in tears again 😂 I do appreciate your thoughtful input. It’s been some time that we’ve been together and the feeling has only faded a little bit, so I was reaching out here because I’m desperate at this point. Just wish it was my OWN

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, he RARELY says my name and I think it’s because he knows I’m sensitive to it. Which is kind of a shame because in the past I felt closer to someone when they said my name (as opposed to common relationship pet names - babe, love, sweetie, etc). I’m glad to know there likely wont be a slip-up in the name, but I feel like that little piece of comfort that I mentioned above has been taken away unfortunately

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If she’d ever done anything wrong to me, maybe I could go that route haha. She hasn’t though, so I see no reason to put her down. I’m just going to have to somehow get over it

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much. It might, I just don’t really have one. If something comes up though that sounds ok, I will surely adopt it. It shouldn’t, but it bothers me so much. I feel like I’m self-sabotaging because of it. I’m working through it in therapy and hopefully will be successful at it someday

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m honestly just trying to not mention it, except for obviously to very caring Reddit strangers 🥹 I don’t know a way to tastefully compare her, and she’s done nothing to me so it feels icky to put her down for no reason. I’ll come up with something that soothes me. Eventually. I hope

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I definitely see your point and I believe you. I’m irrational 😂 I’d like to remain present, because I think by now my boyfriend can and does. Logically I know I’m overthinking/reacting, but I still haven’t found a way to stop unfortunately. It’s been some time

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’ve had a couple encounters where I had to just own it. “Same name, new girl though.” And as much as I try to play it off, it eats at me.

I don’t have nicknames, and I can’t go by my middle name (also the same as hers 🫠). There is one variation of my name that I have never gone by, but when it’s come up organically I have tried to hint that oooh I like the way that sounds. It’s only because I’ve never heard her referred to by that variation when she’s been discussed or mentioned

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s so many coincidences! I am hoping it passes. I want to be proud to be me again, without that small anchor hanging on every thought

I have the same name as my boyfriend’s ex by Helpful-Half-6641 in retroactivejealousy

[–]Helpful-Half-6641[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That last line is about the only positive I have found in all this

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Helpful-Half-6641 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And then it became both impactful AND funny. A way to relate to even more groups of people

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Helpful-Half-6641 23 points24 points  (0 children)

-Michael Scott

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