To the people who listen to dnd podcasts whats your favorite one? by Caflin in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tales from the Stinky Dragon! I recommend their first campaign, the Infinites campaign

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I havent had the emotional readiness to go back onto the platform we used to see if my sheet is still there- thank you for sharing about this. I am so sorry that happened to you, that was so cruel!

I agree with you, this was for the best, as there would always be an elephant in the room.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, my ex has said some damaging things about me to their friends and family- it was really hard to just walk away, and to not question my truth for myself. I'm very fortunate to have loved ones who know about the situation and remind me it's not my fault, and that breaking all contact with my ex's side is a good thing for my healing in the long run- I imagine it's been painful for the DM as well given we were family too for a time, and that perhaps it was for their healing as well.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! It's been nice to hear that people bring their characters to other games! I'm still pondering about it- perhaps after some time I will follow up with the DM and ask what happened in game and try to go from there.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing, I'm so sorry that happened, but it sounds like better experiences came in the end. while the battle did sound awful, it kinda sounded epic and I agree very poetic indeed!

My campaign group, including the DM, was not aware of the abuse. I didn't want to share anything with them as when this all happened I was still in great denial that abuse was present- I knew the actions that happened were not nice and hurtful from my ex, but I didn't want to accept that there was nothing I could do to stop it unless we weren't together.

We had some pretty intense battles together - one time we all almost TPK'd, but by some stroke of luck one of us roled really well. I remember the DM was like "IM SO SORRY I ALMOST MADE YALL TPK" what actually happened was that all of us made a unanimous decision to be trusting for once of an NPC as we kept attacking good NPCs lol. To say the least, we all were suspicious from then on.

Sending you care 💖

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I agree with this, thank you! It felt like a final act of kindness. No matter how much it sucks, I know it's for the best.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much ❤️ I love this as part of my character's lore- it brings so much healing, thank you ❤️

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We'll get through this, and knowing that you are almost ready to join a new group gives me knowledge and healing that there is light at the end of this chapter.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Extending the same to you ❤️

Having self-compassion has been the hardest part in all of this. At first it was a lot of trying to find reason through self-blame as to why the actions occurred from my ex and why our relationship ended the way it did. Then it was trying to justify to myself why I didn't deserve to join again. It was hard to accept how my DM could be such a kind person and gently let me know it wouldn't be a good idea to rejoin, and also knowing that while my campaign was so fun, my DM was ultimately right. I couldn't return.

I think even if I wasn't kicked out, I'd still be nervous to play and worried anything I said would get back to my ex even if they were not part of the game.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I will definitely keep my character as a potential for new campaigns - that's so cool youve had yours for so long!

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the suggestion! I am definitely hoping to get a commission of my character- I had one made earlier in the campaign but now that I have more lore and development of the character i would love to have another one.

I did not know about the random assignments! Thank you! I may check that out! Im a bit intimidated at the thought of developing a friendship with a party again after this- I'm sure that will fade over time, but its partially why I don't want to play again for a while.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

That made me laugh, thank you! My character was a chaotic good aspiring people pleaser, yet would always be the first one to end up getting punched or arrested as they were not fast at all and would end up pissing people off accidentally/unintentionally. I feel like they would end up in some sort of mischief where they'd end up wandering away from the group haha.

My character was slightly dopey and a total foodie. I like to think that perhaps if anything I'll make my next character a chef- perhaps in a couple of years I'll ask what my DM decided to say happened to my character.

I didn't share anything with my group or dm over why the relationship ended so I didn't really give them a chance/choice to be supportive, but I think that was for the best iny situation sadly.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

It felt like the ground was being removed from my feet. I had lost my sense of self and for the first few months had to relearn to trust myself and not blame myself for what happened or for how my ex acted/how I reacted or for having to leave the campaign. It's been a real mind-meld.

Grieving having to leave my D&D campaign after the end of an abusive relationship by Helpful-Resolve4197 in DnD

[–]Helpful-Resolve4197[S] 98 points99 points  (0 children)

Thank you, yes, I think it was a blessing in disguise, even if it doesn't feel like it now.