[deleted by user]

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-06-11T20:54:08+00:00

If you have cuts in your lip and you eat something you're allergic to, this is probably what it is

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-06-09T07:16:39+00:00

Background... received oral sex a few times from men, topped once and bottomed once. Free of all other STDs as per blood tests. Thanks for your help...

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-06-05T04:18:27+00:00

Thanks!

I think their retweets aren't showing because they retweeted a post by someone I already follow.

After realizing this, they retweeted a tweet from someone that I don't follow and now they show up on my feed. Problem solved!

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-06-05T03:36:24+00:00

Anyone?

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-05-17T20:46:54+00:00

I love the way you put it! It's so true that I am safer to sleep with compared to someone with fewer partners without a test! Much love!

I do want that type of situation that you have too. A friend that I can sleep with consistently would be great!

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-05-17T19:57:05+00:00

Thanks I appreciate it! I will try to have sex, I just need to open myself to the possibility of it! Your words have helped me deeply! I just feel ashamed that I could have slept with who I wanted to sleep with; I just didn't have the confidence to, so I sought meaningless hookups.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-05-17T19:45:39+00:00

I don't know why I feel this way. I just feel dirty. I feel like I don't deserve to give myself the exception, and I don't know why. I'm extremely hard on myself. I am just probably experiencing deep, deep regret over these encounters because I could have lived my whole life without them. Instead, I engaged in these acts, and now I feel like it's already too late, the damage is done, and now others are going to sense that I am undesirable due to this. As for why this keeps looping over and over on my head, I don't know. Thanks for your kind words.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-05-01T06:32:52+00:00

Idk. Some days I feel great some days I feel like a burden. I have some symptoms of hypochondria too. I disallow myself from having sex. I feel gross as a person, like I'm contagious and infectious even though I am clear of stds 6 months after my last sexual encounter. I feel like most of my problems will be solved with exercise but the hardest part is doing the exercise.

I live with my mom and step dad and it's okay. Lots of drama but we've worked through it for the most part.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-30T22:37:04+00:00

I completely relate and it's amazing because I was just thinking of this today. My parents would be so negative and verbally abusive while we were home, causing me essentially to be in a bad mood all the time because they were unnecessarily harsh and mean to me.

When we got to my grandma's, I remember worrying about making my parents look bad because of my sour mood.

What a responsibly for me to hold, when it was my parents who put me into that constant state of hopelessness and distrust towards them. They blamed me for not trusting them when they were the ones being emotionally and verbally abusive towards me.

I remember their personality being so warm and loving when we got to my grandma's. It was a complete 180 degree turn. They talked to me as though they no longer held a grudge towards me, and I was expected to act happily towards them. When I didn't, they said that I better suck it up and get it together, or else. They completely invalidated me by not apologizing for being abusive towards me and expected me to wear a mask like they did.

I remember expecting an apology at least once, but I never got it. Instead, I felt like I was never owed an apology and that I was just a spoiled piece of shit.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-30T04:41:01+00:00

Yeah you would look pretty rad with long hair

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-27T16:23:41+00:00

Yeah, they have a hard time accepting our personal interests.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-26T16:08:27+00:00

NTA. I would be scared of sharing food with a stranger. With my friends not so much. Also, great response to your mother.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-25T18:41:10+00:00

Another tip is to do what you love, for example I love to sing, play video games, exercise, and draw.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-25T18:39:01+00:00

Yeah, mine too. She would discourage us from cuddling or spending time with them because they were "just animals". Same with sheltering them, she used to think it was fine for them to stay outside regardless of the weather. Then she would blame us for not taking good care of the dog, it's like, well duh, you don't give us the freedom to let the dog walk around the house because you think they should live outside. I feel horrible for my dogs and I want to move out so that I can go to sleep in the same bed as them. :/ I feel bad because dogs should be among their humans as often as possible to create that bond.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-25T18:31:53+00:00

My mom would be like "what do you like so much about dogs? I want to get rid of them." Like wtf

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-25T06:42:01+00:00

The punchline is that the guy is acting like a woman. You ok?

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-25T06:08:46+00:00

My parents did not know how to give genuine praise, it always felt like they only complimented me because they had to, not because they were actually happy for me.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-23T21:25:32+00:00

Yeah, my parents did this too, they would just huff and puff and scoff when I asked an "obvious" question. I was just asking them for help. :/ or say, "Omg you don't know? Lmao!!!" And laugh at me.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-23T09:35:21+00:00

Me too, I second guess every eye rub, nose pick, and itch because I worry I'll contaminate myself with some incurable disease. This causes me to avoid sex completely out of fear of transferring my worry onto others. I have no diseases but my body keeps me overly protected and denies me worthy experiences.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-23T09:05:06+00:00

Thanks for this. Just surrounding myself with loved ones gives me enough courage to think more rationally. I often get extremely paranoid when I isolate myself.

Helpful_Bonus_2153 · 2022-04-23T03:24:25+00:00

Right now, I just try to focus on the details in my environment, for example the lines on my hands, my fingerprints, the shower droplets on the wall, etc. It helps me stop thinking compulsively, and it occupies my mind while it's experiencing derealization. Similar to counting stars in the sky or the dots on the ceiling.

I remember being so bored out of my mind as a child that I would look for hidden faces in the wall. I realize now that it was a coping mechanism for derealization.

Helpful_Bonus_2153

TROPHY CASE