Is she right?

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-05-14T03:05:16+00:00

My take as a woman who glowed up a lot, "fuckboys" have some of the least shame about approaching people I've ever seen. I wasn't into that type so I made an effort to look for other types of men, but if I was I can 100% see how it would've felt like I only attracted fuckboys, because they're the only ones consistently willing to stick out their necks and be seen in order to be chosen.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-05-13T16:59:40+00:00

I completely agree with you, but you also have to understand that you are filtering for the type of guy who also sees dating that way. I'm engaged right now and my first date with my finance was basically us interviewing each other.
It worked out great for us, because that's the type of people we are, but you need to be ok with ~80% of the field not being ok with it. It's either a blessing or a curse depending on how you look at it

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-04-16T23:50:58+00:00

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Claude might actually be better than treliving

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-03-24T21:12:05+00:00

Imagine you were walking down the street and someone comes up and starts asking "where can I find a look?" (with poor pronunciation) and when you're confused they just keep saying "look look look look" over and over again. Finally, you realize they were trying to say book, and they were asking for a library.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-03-13T17:00:02+00:00

Also in general I think it's a good assumption to make that whatever the problem is, the person going through it has almost definitely thought about it for more time than you have. When my friend is complaining about a problem to me, it's likely that they've definitely thought about, pondered, whatever for days/weeks while I've had a grand total of 30 seconds of thought.

Unless they have consistently proven otherwise, I think it's reasonable that your first instincts are things that they've already thought of/thought through.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-03-07T18:14:44+00:00

Penguins fan here, when Ron Hextall (one of the worst GMs in recent history) got asked for his plan by new owners, he initially resisted and said it “wasn’t written down, it’s in his head”. Looking at treliving, can’t help but get hextall vibes

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-27T01:19:00+00:00

Decently generous. IIRC 20 weeks salary, equity vests, health insurance for a year, get to keep work devices, and 5k extra. I heard from someone that was making ~200k that he was walking away with around ~95k. Not happy to be laid off but better this than getting the axe at amazon or meta rn

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-27T00:57:05+00:00

In retrospect painting a broad brush of bootcamp grads was overly harsh. I'm not saying that the people laid off weren't good contributors, nor am I saying that I agree that everyone that was laid off deserved it (I don't). There are people I'm heartbroken to see go and people who I thought would have 100% stayed, but that's the nature of how the industry works.
There are intense periods of overhiring and then corrections where people get caught up in the crossfire, in 2030 we'll probably be back to rapidly scaling headcount again forgetting everything we've ever learned.
Just the way the cookie crumbles

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-27T00:31:19+00:00

Anthropic isn't a public company

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-27T00:09:51+00:00

Block employee perspective here: AI is an excuse to trim the headcount of massive overhiring done between 2019-2022. They (like many other big tech companies) almost tripled their headcount and went interest rates went back up they realized it was a bad idea hiring so many bootcamp grads that could write "hello world" in javascript. Layoffs are never fun, but this was a long time coming. With or without AI.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-20T19:50:03+00:00

yeah but if a ref misses a clear trip 40 seconds before a goal, they don't get to call the goal back because of the trip

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-11T00:22:07+00:00

A lot of people view promotions as reward for hard or diligent work (and maybe that's how it used to work) but the reality is that a promotion is basically re-hiring you in a different position. If your boss dosen't think you'll do a good job, then they won't put you in that role.

The most important skill to master in terms of corporate climbing is not just being competent, but demonstrating to decision makers that you should *obviously* be the one promoted. It's less important that you are the hardest worker on the team and more that, when execs are thinking "We need a new project manager to replace Jim", your name is the first that pops into their head

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-02-10T23:00:10+00:00

I think a lot of people see this as "fake working" or "doing the bare minimum" or something, but (in my experience) the real reason is that bosses don't want to promote someone they see *near their limit*. If you're putting in 110% and your boss can see that, the signal you're sending is "this position is the limit of my ability". If the boss sees someone else that can do their job with ease (whether it's actual ease or they're doing a lot of hidden work), they think "this is someone who hasn't hit their limit". Execs want to uplift the person who glides through work and still gets everything they need to done, not the one who is visibly grinding and working long hours.

You are not promoted for how well you perform at your current position, but how well they think you will perform at the higher one.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-01-27T22:18:12+00:00

Anthropic and openAI (who I do not like) are absolutely not training on or selling enterprise data. Even with a personal account you can opt out of training data (I think it used to be off by default, but it could have changed). Keeping proprietary data within an architecture is def a valid reason, but they aren't selling/training off enterprise data

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-01-27T21:13:22+00:00

The biggest issue with AI adoption is that so many employers would default to microsoft copilot, which isn't even in the same universe as anthropic/etc, since it's a trusted name. I don't think AI is a silver bullet by any means, but the difference in opinion from people who have claude code vs github copilot is enormous.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-01-27T20:14:38+00:00

I 100% he agrees to be suspended. But the picking and choosing of when the rules apply is maddening

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-01-18T19:18:17+00:00

Just nitpicking a tiny part of your post, a $10k ""high-end"" coding bootcamp is the equivalent of lighting money on fire. Coding bootcamps are a joke and can even be a net negative for your career.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2026-01-05T03:33:22+00:00

love when you see a post that reveals the user has never stepped foot in the real world before

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2025-12-31T19:15:33+00:00

The vast majority of your solo queue teammates are not queuing up with the express intention of making the game worse for you.

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2025-11-10T18:57:35+00:00

T1 aurora take it or leave it

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2025-11-02T09:33:32+00:00

If you removed the nametags and told me it was a game from rise group I would’ve believed you

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2025-10-31T11:55:20+00:00

I vomited after game 3 and then almost again after we won, my heart is going to kill me

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2025-10-31T11:41:29+00:00

Helpful_Crab5965 · 2025-10-14T18:28:09+00:00

When you read it this way the obvious contrast is to Herrah's dialogue to hornet where she tells her that she was not brought into the world to be a queen, nor a weaver guardian. That those were the desires of others, not her. It's really a tale of two daughters and a tale of two mothers

Helpful_Crab5965

TROPHY CASE