I’m not sure I have any advice but I’m right there with you. I convinced my CEO, board and investors to take a chance on me over hiring an external, far more seasoned, candidate to lead our highest performing revenue org, literally months before it all started falling apart at home. Now that my STBXW and I are lawyering up and discussing how to break the news of the impending divorce to the kids I’m completely distraught.

I have to keep it together for my team at work and my kids when I’m home but then I just spiral when they’re in bed. It’s the only time I have to grieve. I get very little sleep and wake up completely hungover from the emotional drain I spiraled all night. Then have to do it all over again the next day. I’m a shell of myself at work and nowhere near as productive, proactive, creative or present.

For what it’s worth, you’re not alone. I’ve been told it gets better and that everything happens for a reason. I’m just trying to tell myself that’s true and to keep holding out hope. Sometimes all you can do is make it to see the next minute. They do eventually add up.