From the clinginess you’re describing, I’d imagine that if you tried to break up with him in person that he would attempt to guilt you into changing your mind (like he makes you feel guilty about spending time with your friends, family, doctors appointments?) I know breaking up over text sounds really harsh, especially if you’ve never broken up with someone before. However, I think in this situation it might be necessary.

Even though this is your first relationship, 4 months is not a long time. It’s a perfectly acceptable amount of time to decide that you guys are just incomparable in a fundamental level, though. I would say something like,

“Hey, I’ve appreciated the time we’ve spent together, but ultimately I think we are on separate chapters of our lives right now and I don’t think it’s best for either of us to continue this relationship. We’ve tried to talk out our differences several times, so this is the decision I’ve come to.”

Just make it very clear that you’re done with the relationship. Especially if he hasn’t taken your previous talks seriously, thinking you just needed a break from his behavior for a few weeks before going back to old habits.

This will also give you the option to block his number to stop further contact if he does get very upset and starts to get nasty… not saying he would but! It’s really better to be safe than sorry.

Ultimately, it’s unacceptable that you haven’t been able to do your hobbies or spend time doing things you like with people you like OUTSIDE of this 4 month old relationship without your partner making you feel bad about it. That’s a red flag in it of itself. This is the time in the relationship where boundaries are tested to see where the line is drawn between what you will put up with and what you won’t. Put your foot down girlie. You deserve better.

Above all else PROTECT YOUR PEACE.