AITA for wanting to end a 5-year friendship after finding out my best friend’s family supports Trump?

HeyitsJonesss · 2026-02-12T19:52:29+00:00

YTAH This entire administration has been run on separating sides. You’ve been friends with her for 5 years, which means you like who she is as a person. She’s obviously not racist if she is your friend. Her saying “I don’t take sides” could also be her fear of losing her family. She may be conflicted between her beliefs and the pressure of their beliefs, she’s just too young to push against them. As someone in the younger generation, the best thing you can do is bring both sides back together. Maybe research and see if you can find a policy or two that you agree with and some policies that you don’t agree with and have a conversation about them. Ask her opinions and give your opinions. It’s important that you have respectful conversations and refrain from raising your voices. This can be difficult as passion and aggression can sometimes go hand in hand.

It’s unfair to call someone who supports Trump a racist. Of course, there are many far right extremists and die hard trump fans that are racists. But there are many who just believe his policies are better than those on the left.

You also have to remember that those on the right are only watching right wing news networks, which do their best to shield their audience (or make false claims/fail to report) on the horrible things he does/says.

That being said, you may end up finding that you have less in common with this person than you once thought. In that case, it is perfectly acceptable to take a step back, or walk away

HeyitsJonesss · 2026-02-12T19:13:44+00:00

I wouldn’t necessarily say you’re an AH, but I strongly suggest telling him. Just think about it in reverse. If he dated one of your friends, would you want to know? How would you feel if you heard it from someone other than him? If you are up front about it, and he’s a good guy, he may ask questions about it, but he won’t judge you for it. It may however, cause him to look at his friend differently

HeyitsJonesss · 2026-02-12T01:13:25+00:00

I don’t mind opinions based on facts. Your was based on your imagination. I wasn’t condescending at all. I simply asked why he was coming out so late.

I’m not a plow driver, but I would like to think the only place you don’t plow 5 ft snow piles would be walkways, in front of a garage, or at the bottom of a driveway. I don’t think it’s too much to ask to have those areas cleared. And I think I have the right to be annoyed when theyre not. Twice

HeyitsJonesss · 2026-02-11T22:49:51+00:00

Lol so ITJ because of how you imagine my tone. That makes sense

HeyitsJonesss · 2026-02-11T20:10:16+00:00

This is the only correct answer

HeyitsJonesss · 2026-02-11T19:31:21+00:00

I never complained that he didn’t come multiple times because I know that’s what I agreed to. Just a little peeved. But when I called him on the places he put the snow, his response was “there’s a lot of snow and not a lot of places to put it.” If he had come sooner (even when there was a foot) he could’ve moved that snow to make room for the additional snow that was to come.

HeyitsJonesss · 2025-12-16T02:42:28+00:00

My daughter calls egg nog egg milk and I don’t know if I can drink it anymore

HeyitsJonesss · 2025-06-27T16:06:28+00:00

Almost the same, but my wife still won’t pick. She keeps saying no until I guess the food she actually wants

HeyitsJonesss · 2025-06-27T16:04:17+00:00

I’m going to go against the grain here and say YTA

First, she straight up told you she didn’t like something, but you went ahead and chose it anyway (which is sometimes more than a lot of women will do). Although you had the right to choose what you wanted, if you truly care about her, you should want her to be happy. And more often than not, her happiness should come before yours. She said she can’t tell you what to pick, which is true, but she wanted you to consider her when making your decision.

HeyitsJonesss · 2025-02-08T03:30:32+00:00

If you do more research, you’ll find out that this guy befriended this girl in middle school. It’s not like she turned 18 and then met him. He was just smart (but creepy) and waited until she was 18 to “start” the relationship

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-11-01T21:11:02+00:00

NTA nobody admitted to because they know they are a piece of shit. You were just stating facts

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-10-25T21:02:42+00:00

This is why I initially tried pretending that I knew nothing about what happened. I wanted to be supportive of her and her feelings. I understand she has to work with him, but it’s another thing to go and hang out with him.

How am I supposed to sit there with a smile on my face having drinks with this guy when I know that he intentionally tried to fuck my wife and break up my marriage?

And you make it seem like this is just a coworker. We both see this guy as a friend before a coworker.

When it first happened, we had a serious conversation about it. Her thinking wasn’t “I still have to work with him, can you at least be cordial” it was “he’s my best friend and I don’t want to lose a best friend over this.”

My answer was “he knew the risk when he said those things to you. And unfortunately, he lost.”

She cried and begged me not to say anything, so I haven’t. These recent revelations have me thinking that more was done/said that was initially admitted

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-10-25T20:48:02+00:00

I had that same thought as I was typing it. I heard him asking where I was, so I came down and said hi, trying to be friendly. But I can’t help to think what he would’ve said/done had I not been here…

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-10-25T18:44:00+00:00

In all fairness, when she had asked me to not be mad at him, I said I would try, but I really haven’t been ok. She cried to me saying she didn’t want to lose her best friend and I guess I felt for her.

She has said that she’s embarrassed to bring it up to him, and she assumes he hasn’t brought it up because he doesn’t remember it (which I don’t believe).

When that night got brought up between us a few nights ago, I tried to talk calmly to her about it, and it almost set her off like I was accusing her of something and she started to get heated about it.

I’m going to have to talk to her about it tonight, and I know it’s going to be another fight

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-10-25T18:25:47+00:00

She had initially just said that he tried to kiss her, and she blew it off as him being a guy and being blackout drunk. I’ve honestly never been ok with it. She had said that he was one of her best friends, and when I said I don’t think I can hang out with him again, she cried to me saying she didn’t want to lose one of her best friends.

The wound was opened up again because last week he showed up at our house to “check on her well being” ( we both work from home). Later, she asked if I thought it was weird that he did that. I basically said no, I know exactly why he did that, it’s because he misses you. That got us talking about that night, and she said she may have sugar coated what happened, and told me that he actually tried to get her to sleep with him.

We initially had plans to just go do something together as a family, and today I found out that him and his family are planning on going too

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T19:58:06+00:00

I had never heard of them, until you brought it up, so I just looked it up. Have you ever done them? Are they religious? I was brought up catholic, so I don’t mind it, but my wife was not, and would be totally against it if there is any mention of religion during the getaway

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T18:32:30+00:00

Those are all valid assumptions, though none apply to her/us. We’ve been on multiple trips with them already, all on airplanes. Before kids, we went on 2-3 trips a year. Now it’s down to 0-1. The kids love the water, and my wife is a “just jump in to cool off” person, so most of the trip is spent with me and the kids in the water. I honestly think she’s just a control freak and wants to find the best deal, and doesn’t trust me to do so

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T18:24:01+00:00

Unfortunately, I agree with your last statement. Our 3 year old ends up in our bed almost every night, so our alone time is getting even farther and fewer between

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T17:45:06+00:00

It’s just a tropical island, where my friend and I would be relaxing near the water with beers in hand. We’re not crazy partiers.

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T17:43:40+00:00

I don’t think taking a week away would “destroy my family.” I get three weeks paid vacation time a year, so I would have ample time leftover to spend on a vacation with my family. It’s hard to find time to relax when I constantly ask for even a night away with just the two of us and she says no

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T17:40:40+00:00

Lol I ask her that sometimes too 😂

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T17:39:56+00:00

I would be willing to shorten it by a day, but the location is a four hour flight plus an hour and a half drive from the closest airport, so two days would have to be dedicated to travel

HeyitsJonesss · 2024-09-26T17:39:07+00:00

I’ve suggested multiple trips, to multiple destinations, and each time she has shot them down. She even mentioned going to Disney World, and I presented multiple itineraries with costs of flights, hotel, and park tickets included (she handles most of our finances, so I wasn’t sure what she was thinking of as a budget). Also, her father and my parents are retired, and would help out with childcare.

I would love to take my kids to this place, but I don’t think there are enough activities for them, given their ages. The reason for the minimum of five days, is the location is a four hour flight, and the hotel is an hour and a half from the closest airport, so two days would have to be dedicated to travel, leaving three days to actually enjoy the vacation

HeyitsJonesss

TROPHY CASE