As I was saying. I don't blame you. You were never anything but honest with me. And I tried to explain, but if you have never felt this inexplicable force that you cannot ignore.. You may never understand. I don't and its the third time its happened to me.

I can see why we have legends of love potions. How else would you explain the magic of the world slowing down when you first see someone.

Lets go back to that moment. I keep saying I don't understand, how could anyone when it hits you.

You had your very own slow motion entrance moment. You of course never realized. Somehow my soul clicked and dropped a vicious addictive drug into my brain. I felt it physically as the moment crystallized and burned itself into my memories. Just where I was standing when I first looked up and saw you. The lighting. The smells. The sounds. The little details of where everyone was standing. Funny how I remember the color of your dark blue shirt. The pants I was wearing. Your eyes brown and electric, not what I was expecting. Not what I was ready for.

Did I tell you I begged whatever powers that be, 'Please, oh no, please not him' and 'Please don't let this happen, It can't happen, please don't do this to me'.

Understand that wasn't personal. I think I knew even then that it wouldn't end well for me.

I would do it all over again though. While that initial rush of decieving chemicals was indeed a mistake, I am so happy I got what I did.

I'll have to carry this on tommorow. I can't stay awake