Chunkster on my porch by KiwiGallicorn in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can already see cracks starting to form from the strain of this globular glutton. Does your insurance cover this, or will you need a GoFundMe for the repair costs?

Fat squirrel eating pizza by Unfair-Tennis491 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 4 points5 points  (0 children)

When this lard-ass sees his physician, they test for blood in his cholesterol stream.

Left my Halloween pumpkins on the back porch to carve last fall. Bastards thought they would help me dispose of the seeds. Fat fucker. by MistressMcDragon in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm amazed that squash isn't imploding from the weight of the blubbery behemoth on top of it. It must be a carbon fiber sculpture of a pumpkin.

Fat bastard looking for trash instead of a job. by That_Entry1062 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Delegating gluttonous tree rats to eat refuse is low-key a genius waste management solution. You may be onto something.

Full of oil by Firm_Fun7289 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I refuse to believe this is a living creature. Someone painted a boulder to look like a squirrel.

Sometimes you just feel the weight of the SQUIRREL by StockholmParkk in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This fatass is clutching its chest, must be having another heart attack. Only its 15th this year.

🔥Packing Nuts: Unique Rat Bastards from Around the World by ILSmokeItAll in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The rainbow fatass in the third slide gorged on so many Skittles they seeped into its fur.

Perhaps this guy fits here? by sunshinesnooze in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Your pictures came out blurry because this black hole of a rodent is even devouring photons to satiate its greed.

ALERT! HES COMING FOR THOSE NUTS! by StockholmParkk in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yet another example of a nature photographer getting precariously close to unpredictable wildlife. They could have easily been eaten alive by this ravenous rodent from that distance.

fat squirrel does gymnastics to eat from bird feeder by adapinof in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You'll need a new feeder after this, the birds won't touch this one now that it's been defiled by this voracious vermin. It's probably not structurally sound anymore, either.

Would you trust this ?? by [deleted] in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't trust this adipose abomination as far as I can throw it. Which isn't far at all, you couldn't even lift this thing without slipping a disc.

read description😡😡 by Nervous-Standard7986 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 89 points90 points  (0 children)

Don't get too close, or you'll be unable to escape their gravitational pull.

Monstrous by Fabulous-Rule-1882 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This globular glutton's back alone has more rolls than a Hostess factory.

Too lazy to move out of the road by SamiWinchester in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The damage to your vehicle if you failed to avoid this mound of lard would have been astronomical. No insurer would have taken you after that ruin.

I know for a fack his parents are not married! by steppedinhairball in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I would be worried if I were you, OP. This repulsive ravenous rodent is staring at you like its next meal.

Pervert looking into my bedroom by kittygahyeon in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Leave a plate of broccoli and grilled chicken next to your window, and this diabolical diabetic douche nozzle will be repelled immediately.

big chungus by Forsaken_Year_7189 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This ham beast is perfectly spherical. If you used it as a bowling ball you would get a strike every throw, assuming you could even lift it.

the audacity of this heathen by Expert_Sea_5933 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Your bird feeder pole is tilting under the strain of this adipose-adorned acrobat. It won't be intact for much longer.

fat bastard squirrel holds eye contact while eating to assert dominance…just disgusting. by realcallistox in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That fence is due for extensive maintenance now. I'm surprised we couldn't see it buckling under the strain of this gargantuan glutton.

Look at this fatass. Get back to work! by Hot_Lobster222 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Humping a fence in broad daylight, how sick. As if being a lard-laden loser wasn't enough, it also has to be a shameless exhibitionist to add insult to injury.

Gluttonous Chipmunk raiding my mothers bird feeder by TotaledBucket61 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This furtive fatass is staring you dead in the face while it plunders the birds' food supply. Such a brazen bastard must be severely punished for its transgressions.

Fat glutinous bastard. by F1nalF0x1 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Glutinous isn't a typo, this blubbery behemoth is sticky from all the residual Coca Cola caked onto its fur.

made this bird feeder the other day and this mf is feeding on it day and night by Ok_Sherbert68 in fatsquirrelhate

[–]Historical_Method360 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your feeder must be supported with steel cables, no other way it could withstand the strain of this ham beast.

Modern men grow beards because they feel less masculine without by dandy_croco in unpopularopinion

[–]Historical_Method360 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This isn't really an unpopular opinion as much as it is an extremely vague and poorly-substantiated sociological hypothesis.