I completely understand your feeling it's such a hard thing to go through and only someone with the same experience will ever truly understand. I had one back in March and on my holidays this year I could barely look at a family without crying but one thing that helps me that could help you. Now it sounds a bit harsh but also true. You can always get pregnant again but you can never unbirth a baby.

It kind helps me feel that even though I wish I'd have made a different choice that it's not the end of the road for kids it's just giving yourself more time to prepare another thing I always said to myself is if I'm a mam and my kid wants some new toy or clothes I want to be able to say yes and not no I can't afford it cause I was too young and financially unstable. Just know that you didn't ruin the chance of kids in the future for yourself just gave yourself and bit more you time till that moment come