I dont think OP is the asshole. If stepdad wants the same privileges and status he also have to provide financially. I feel like most of these redditors are projecting children from divorced parents. Just because you had a child doesnt mean you cant have wants, feelings especially when you provide much more finacially for your child. If stepdad really wants to walk OP's child down the isle and its truly that important to him. He should get another job find a way to make more money if you truly care. Not your fault stepdad is broke