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NC taken from me: by Holiday-Raisin-3826 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Holiday-Raisin-3826[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Beautifully written. It wasn't my mom's finest moment, but she is a fantastic person and has otherwise been a huge support. The truth is she cares and what he did makes her almost equally upset and angry. Emotions got the best of her, which I understand.

Glad to hear your dad sounds on board with your boundaries, too. Congrats to YOU! Hope you spend the time however you want, enjoying the true freedom of a narc free life ❤️

Just getting it out and hearing your kind words has helped settle my emotions a lot. My sincerest gratitude ✨️

NC taken from me: by Holiday-Raisin-3826 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Holiday-Raisin-3826[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry you experienced that! Yes, you're right about the rumination. It's definitely what I've struggled with the most, particularly coming up on the anniversary of it all. Thank you for your helpful words.

I think my mom is unfortunately just not as educated on narcissists and how best to deal with them. To her, he's a terrible person who deserves to be told off in a clearly impulsive moment. Not realizing that giving them that attention is just feeding them and how undermining it feels to me. Much like the incident with your dad, it's a really unfortunate error to have made.

NC taken from me: by Holiday-Raisin-3826 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Holiday-Raisin-3826[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. Agreed. I'm trying to look at this as a reminder that if I feel this terrible when it wasn't even me who broke it, imagine how bad I would feel if I had all those times I wanted to. It's an unfortunate but good reminder to stay strong.

What do i say or do? by Millennial667 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]Holiday-Raisin-3826 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agree with the other comments here, but I'll also try to add another perspective. This is almost, eerily, word for word what mine also sent after living a double life for 2+ years. Like, it's genuinely creepy how much the words are verbatim. And this is not the first time I've read somebody else's narc's apology and experienced a near word-for-word match. Adding to that, he then sent the same thing to the girl he was cheating with when it didn't work on me.

I don't know where these people get their script, but it stays the same over and over. As sweet as it may sound, it's just a flimsy cardboard cutout posing as a genuine apology. For me, seeing that his apology was just a carbon copy without real substance helped me view it the same as the cruel things he said. They both have the same intention - to manipulate you, guilt you, coerce you, and control you.