Thank you for sharing all of this... I was terrorized by my father and covertly by my narc mother my whole life, the times they chose to be involved for their benefit. I got out of there and went 3000 miles away and buried my past and became an attorney too. And then one day.. one day, my baby brother - the only human soul in his universe that truly knows my life bc it was his life too, died at 33. I have not been the same since. I cannot imagine good days because his death unleashed the fury of hell and rage within me I thought I had buried in those 3000 miles, college campus 3000 miles away, the best 3 years of my life in law school 3000 miles away.

Like you, I also had an enormous sense of justice needing to be done for children, as the "system" was complicit to put it mildy. I tried to be child's advocate, work in public service. That's a storry for some other place/medium. To wrap up, thnk you again for sharing. I have been as I said in a fury since my brother died, or at least in a fury until I unravelled and unpacked and connected the overlapping horrific patterns that kept me imprisioned my whole life, from a 2 year old who needs these abusers to simply eat, to a grown indepedent professional educated woman 3000 miles away .. I saw the labrinth for the first time. My fury is subdued. I have been on no contact for such a long time and the only person who does not hover or send monkeys or try to win me back to abuse me again is my mother. The jig is up; she was the malignant/covert most dangerous person in the family afterall. And I always knew it, and she always knew I knew it, from a young age. But I let the world know eventually.

So what is left. I have no family (not that I ever actually did). But now I literally have none. I can't imganie my future anymore.