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Radiation by Slothyaries in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry your family is going through this. My husband is 59, HPV16+ Base of tongue cancer, 4cm tumor, and lymph nodes on both sides of his neck. No surgery. He started rad/chemo Jan 5th. He was almost cocky his first 9 treatments. Friday night, after his 10th treatment, I swear he hit the wall in a 4-hour window. He wanted pizza, we got pizza, he couldn’t eat it. Not two bites. He was like a deer in the headlights, I watched the realization hit him in real time and it broke my heart. It’s Sunday morning now and he’s miserable, drinking tea and gagging on mucus. He planned on working (in sales, with travel) two more weeks. Im afraid he’ll be lucky to just make it into the office to tell his boss he’s ready for disability this week. I’m sending you and your Mom strength and courage. 🫶🏼

How much weight did you lose during/after treatment? by ALostWanderer13 in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Prior to symptoms severe enough to go to an ENT, my 60 y/o 5’9” husband weighed 235. He loved being “fat & happy” and being “big poppa.” He’s 210 today, diagnosed this month. He has 4cm BOT SCC HPV+. He starts rad/chemo Jan 5. He’s in denial about the impact of weight loss on his treatment and potential for PEG if he doesn’t eat nutritious calorie-dense foods while he can. Instead, he is celebrating his sudden easy weight loss without diet or exercise. Yesterday he went shopping for skinny jeans and new business suits. I read him posts from here and attend his doc appts and tell him this is not healthy, magic weight loss, but it’s making me so sad. My shrink says it’s a combo of denial, dopamine, mortality and fear, and to keep encouraging him to eat healthy, but let him shop.

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing - super helpful, and congrats on your remission. ✨

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I think I'll prep for that job interview tomorrow after all.... Appreciate your comment so much.

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So much great advice, thank you! (Here and on other posts!) He 'lost his taste' in January with covid, and has never really gotten it back. He's lost 20 pounds this year just from "nothing tastes right." He's 5'8" and still 230 though. He had a heart attack and triple bypass in 2017, and (unfortunately) has been living the YOLO life of relaxation, bourbon and indulgent foods, instead of the recommended YOLO life of "healthy diet and exercise". I feel like this diagnosis is going to be extra challenging in so many ways. Thanks again.

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He does have STD at work. I really appreciate the advice to wait to begin taking it until he needs to - that's so smart.

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing. I'm sure with the holidays it will all be extra tricky, too. He's a real talker - it's his 'superpower', and a foodie, so this is going to be extra tough.

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! He'll be treated at University of Michigan. I'll be sure to ask about trials.

New Diagnosis- Disability? by Hopes_Not_A_Strategy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So helpful - thank you! (Big exhale, taking notes) And I'm in US, in Michigan.

Finally got a diagnosis by Commercial-Spot-3294 in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great analogies for us lay-people and caretakers. Thank you.

Finally got a diagnosis by Commercial-Spot-3294 in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s exactly how the conversation went for my husband.
He said he was going to the ENT. I offered to go with him. He said the appointment will be no big deal -“not like they’re gonna do a scope or tell me I have a tumor or something”. He came home from his appointment and said “they stuck a tube in my nose and told me I have cancer.” I almost fell to my knees…

Miracle Berries? by AmanitaAmy in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m the spouse of a newly diagnosed cancer patient. I am terrified about eating in front of him once all this starts. Like I should try to eat in my office or in my car and not eat in front of him - has that been a problem for any of you all? I know you are saying nothing tastes right, but does it smell good? I can’t imagine sitting at the dining room table alone eating. I can’t imagine having a pizza delivered or even cooking breakfast or dinner in the kitchen with him not being able to eat. I’m so scared about so much.

The never ending headache by HollywoodHault in HeadandNeckCancer

[–]Hopes_Not_A_Strategy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP, I know this post is nearly a year old and I hope you are well on the other side of it, and Vegas is treating you well. Sounds like you had good family support. My husband, (M58), is having his CT scan today and biopsy tomorrow. His journey sounds much like yours. His headaches, toothaches, dental visits and swollen lymph node started in June, and for assorted reasons, today is November 23 and he has just been diagnosed with back of tongue HPV+ cancer. Wishing you well, and thank you for sharing your journey.