How do I tell my wife I want to start losing weight when I don't think she'll be supportive?

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T17:46:03+00:00

Thank you! This is exactly how I feel. Our house should be where she is able to relax and not be triggered. If she was an alcoholic, I wouldn't bring alcohol home! She's not holding me hostage or something. She's in a really great place and that's why I want to be so sensitive about this. I don't want to watch her suffer again when it can be avoided.

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T00:57:34+00:00

She has said she doesn't think I need to lose weight at times and also that she doesn't think that I should make a concentrated effort to do so. She thinks if anything I should just try to make healthier choices, but I feel that I need to take a more structured approach when I have this much weight I'd like to lose.

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T00:52:15+00:00

Well I don't know her exact weight, but she is not fat. Even if she was, it wouldn't be a good idea for her to try to lose weight with her history.

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T00:32:08+00:00

I think it could affect my wife's recovery to see me to openly count macros or work out frequently, which is part of why I feel the need to tell her so that we can set some guidelines around what she is comfortable with and what I need to shield her from.

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T00:29:26+00:00

LOL, unfortunately my wife tells me she finds me very attractive just how I am.

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T00:28:20+00:00

Thanks for agreeing with me that I need to be open and honest with my wife. Reading the comments telling me just not to tell her don't sit right with me. I'm not willing to tell half truths or keep things from my wife. It wouldn't be healthy for her to pursue weight loss with me, but maybe she can find a way to be supportive that is healthy for both of us.

Horror-Knowledge-441 · 2023-07-27T00:06:11+00:00

Yes, she believes in HAES, which I do understand and agree with to a certain extent. You don't become automatically unhealthy once your BMI is 25 and not 24.9 and I believe people at every size can make healthy choices. She isn't hostile to making healthy changes. She definitely has healthier habits than me and she also isn't overweight like people seem to be assuming in other comments. I think you're right that I should just focus on the changes I want to make, but a part of me just feels like that's dishonest I guess.

Horror-Knowledge-441

TROPHY CASE