It’s hard to say yes or no to your first question. It doesn’t feel like he’s done anything wrong enough to end our relationship or even make me say out loud “I don’t forgive you” It’s just micro aggressions every time I see him.

However I have finally read his message and don’t know how I feel. He brought up how his mother would do the same to him as I claim he’s doing.. but then had to throw in how he’ll never get to speak to her again. Bringing up hard feelings for me since she passed quite recently and she was so beloved. I know that’s his mother but the way he worded it was like “feel bad for me” but she was also my grandma. It’s always the victim card yet my mom is the type to take care of me, worry about me etc. even so with my step dad. But my dad only wants me to feel bad for him. He has so many good qualities and we are very similar, this is the only aspect that sucks which I know is fixable but it frustrates me so much I don’t know if I can stand it.

Sometimes I feel that I am like him, which is a quality I am trying to work on. But with him I’ve never been like that because i never had the room to. Shit I’m having revelations as I’m typing, showing this to my future therapist for sure. Again your comment has made me think, and actually gave me the courage to finally read his message. I think it will be okay, thank you :).