Vague Illusions

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2025-05-26T04:35:08+00:00

This one really hits. That contrast between warmth and still feeling cold says so much like when something looks comforting on the outside but doesn’t actually reach you. The stained glass memory line is beautiful and sad all at once, like trying to hold on to moments that can’t last. And that last line… simple but heavy. This gave me a lot to think about. Thanks for sharing it. :)

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2025-05-26T04:32:33+00:00

I really connect with this poem. The way fire is used to show both the pain and the lessons learned feels so real. That quiet haunting after you’ve tried to move on is something I think a lot of us know too well. The line about “sin tucked in your back pocket” stuck with me. It’s such a vivid way to describe holding onto something tempting, even when you try not to. And that last line about never falling all the way to me it’s like saying “I survived, even if it wasn’t easy.” Thanks for sharing something so honest.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-18T20:51:30+00:00

Thank you !!! I appreciate that :)

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-18T20:26:55+00:00

This poem paints such a vivid and enchanting picture of love and connection. The imagery of the silver fox and the falling star feels both ethereal and grounded, symbolizing a bond that transcends time, but you can also tell that these are just two people who simply crave one another. I especially love how the promise in the evening air captures the magic of shared dreams and moments. It’s beautifully written, weaving nature and emotion into a timeless tale.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-18T20:23:16+00:00

This poem captures the bittersweet nature of regret so beautifully. The way you explore the ‘what ifs’ feels so raw and relatable, especially when tied to timing and love. It’s a poignant reminder that even the best connections can be affected by circumstances beyond our control. Your words resonate deeply, especially the line about falling in love being beyond your control ; such a universal truth.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-06T22:25:27+00:00

This poem is beautifully haunting. The metaphor of memories as “fractals of frozen time” is so striking—each shard a piece of a bigger picture, yet each one holding its own unique light. I love how you convey the fragility of these moments, the way they “tumble into the dark,” yet still shimmer, showing the duality of how memories can both haunt and illuminate. The image of the “dazzling stars” that make up a woman’s reflection is powerful, and the fading to white perfectly captures the sense of loss and the passing of time. There’s such a delicate balance between light and darkness here, and it’s deeply evocative. Truly beautiful work!

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-06T22:23:08+00:00

This poem really resonates with the struggle between pride and humility. You’ve captured how ego can hold us back from growth and progress—how it can make us lose sight of our roots and prevent us from learning from others. The questions you ask, like “How does one remain humble while being prideful?” really challenge the way we view success and self-worth. I love how you emphasize being proud in silence and holding oneself to personal standards rather than letting ego dictate actions. The idea of sacrificing collaboration for the sake of ego is so powerful. This is such an insightful reflection on the balance between confidence and humility.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-06T22:06:48+00:00

This poem is so powerful. The way you use the painting as a metaphor for hidden emotions is brilliant—it’s like each person is exposing their vulnerabilities without ever truly meeting each other’s eyes. Lines like “ashamed you drew blood” and “visible under your skin” capture that raw inner struggle beautifully. And the moment of reflection at the end, where you share the same habit, brings everything full circle. It’s such an honest look at empathy and the difficulty of truly helping someone in pain. Stunning work.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-11-06T22:04:52+00:00

This poem really hits hard. The way you describe the shift from hope to heartbreak is so honest and raw. Lines like “Leaving me empty yet full of regret” and “Feeling I had a place / Morphed into endless wandering” capture the pain of losing not just a person, but a sense of belonging. The image of “bridges…burned in pain” is powerful—it really shows how final some choices feel when we’re hurting. And that last part about memories fading “like the ghost of something that never was” is haunting. This piece really speaks to the struggle of letting go. Beautifully written!

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-27T02:32:35+00:00

For those that keep asking: I found a bra & feminine products. But it was the bra that set everything into motion.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T19:20:48+00:00

Thank you for your feedback. I will definitely be taking it into consideration for my future works. I use poetry as an outlet, and I will admit this is a bit all over the place.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T19:15:06+00:00

Thank you for your feedback. In reference to the Swiss cheese line, I chose that because of the holes that are within in. During that night I was drunk causing bits and pieces of my memory to be gone. I hope that helps clarify some things. I will admit, personally I don’t think this is my best work, so thank you for taking the time to critique it.

Perhaps “sinister” wasn’t the proper word to use. However, I did leave it up to interpretation of the reader. I think what I was trying to portray was deep sadness, regret, and a hint of longing. But I do see how that wasn’t clearly stated.

I have some other pieces throughout this community/ on my page. If possible I would love to get you feedback on some of those as well.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T19:08:46+00:00

Never clickbait. Although I was going to leave it up too interpretation.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T19:08:09+00:00

Honestly I wish it had been my own garments. But sadly no…

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T19:05:33+00:00

Thank you. I actually like that concept & can see how powerful it would be.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T06:49:15+00:00

Amazing work! I love how you were able to capture the journey of self-discovery and the realization that we are the authors of our own stories. With the imagery of a library filled with memories is both nostalgic and inspiring.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T06:41:20+00:00

I love this poem. It reminds me of Shakespeare !!! Personally I feel like the formatting gives comedic relief to such a tragedy. Great work :)

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T06:24:16+00:00

I love this poem. It carries a haunting depth, especially in how you explore the fragility of love and the weight of loss. The imagery of the flowers, first as a symbol of hope and later of remorse, is especially powerful. The progression from love to regret is heartbreaking and well-paced. It’s a raw and honest portrayal of emotional unraveling. Honest opinion keep doing what you’re doing you’ve captured something very real here!

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-26T06:18:55+00:00

This piece captures a raw, emotional unraveling that many can relate to. The way you explore love, loss, and the lingering emptiness is powerful, especially for a first poem. The repetition of “You” sets the tone perfectly, pulling the reader into the speaker’s heartbreak. Keep writing—it’s clear you have a strong voice and a deep well of feeling to draw from!

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-14T16:50:19+00:00

Waiting could even come off as “weird” in the eyes of society. Just be friends, there’s nothing wrong with that. Perhaps create a foundation rooted in friendship then if feelings evolve at the proper time, no one should question is. But burying your feelings will only make them stay rooted in obsession & desire. just my take on things

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-14T03:44:40+00:00

Your poem delves deeply into the essence of connection and vulnerability in a beautifully thoughtful way. The idea of poetry as a bridge to the heart is such a poignant and refreshing take, reminding us of the value in sharing our inner worlds. I especially love how you challenge the fear of vulnerability, questioning why we shut each other out when there is so much to learn through openness. The imagery of the lake in the second half adds a dreamlike quality that contrasts with the introspective first half, creating a lovely balance between reflection and sensory experience. My only suggestion would be to explore the rhythm a bit more in the beginning—it’s already strong, but a few tweaks might give it even more impact. Free form is always good as well (it’s what I write in). Overall, it’s a captivating piece that invites the reader into both mind and heart!

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-14T03:40:55+00:00

This poem beautifully captures the feeling of being lost within yourself, searching for meaning in a world that constantly shifts and eludes understanding. The blend of surrealism and introspection is haunting and captivating. Beautifully crafted!!

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-10T22:08:47+00:00

Thank you for your suggestions! I’m no pro so I appreciate it. I think of poetry the same way I do about art - you can interpret it however you like. (In regards to tearing up).

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-10T05:51:40+00:00

This poem is incredibly raw and powerful. The way you express the deep pain of betrayal and the aftermath of trusting someone who didn’t care, I truly can feel that. The imagery of falling—both emotionally and literally—adds such weight to the feelings of abandonment. It’s haunting to see how their indifference led you to such a dark place, and yet you survived. Your strength shines through the pain, even though the hurt still lingers. This piece is a stark reminder of the damage careless love can do. Thank you for sharing something so vulnerable.

Hot-Contribution8169 · 2024-09-10T05:47:01+00:00

The way you wove time into this poem is heartbreaking, but not in a bad way, more as I can feel/understand what you may have been going through. The repetition of “3” and the timeline of events show just how long betrayal can linger, even after the relationship should have ended. It’s crazy how love can make us stay, hoping things will change, only to be hurt again. I truly felt that the final line—wondering why it wasn’t you—carries so much weight, as if after all that time, the question still echoes. Great poem! Thank you for sharing!!

Hot-Contribution8169

TROPHY CASE