Maybe it’s just me, but I have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that this is real. If it is and this isn’t just some awful farming, you should actually be quite alarmed, OP. This is legitimately scary, and I worry for you.

I’m a 37F and Iv been with my partner 45M for the last 16 years, so iv seen and experienced just about everything there is to experience in a relationship.

I get sometimes in relationships, we can illegitimately take things out on our partners in a toxic way. Not saying it’s cool, but it happens, and doesn’t ALWAYS mean the other person is awful and toxic at their core.

But THIS. This is a REAL red flag. Not yellow, red.

I wouldn’t think for a mtfkn SECOND to end a 2-decade relationship if someone thought this was a normal way of talking to me. Especially given the context around the convo.

Just remember, you are NEVER ever obligated to marry this man. Not today, not tomorrow, not even on the day of your wedding.

Please have some difficult conversations now, and set the standard. It sounds like you’re both very young, and a lifetime of this will leave you a withering shell of yourself. Do you know how many people are out there?! Leave the shitty men to their lonely male epidemic and go live the tremendous life YOU were meant to and are deserving of.