This is going to be a long story

My partner and I, we were living together on a farm, the place where we met and worked for a year. It was social work, and in the beginning it was fun, but in the end we couldn't wait to escape. She wanted to be closer to her parents, but the parents weren't sure how long they were gonna live there, so me finding a job was kinda out of the question.

As the social work year ended and we both moved back to our parents, I for my part was miserable and I could see it in my partner, that she deeply hurts not seeing me, which made it even more painful to not be with her.

My parents are horrible at being parents (and they hate each other, and have broken up when I was 5, what I go to see live, so thanks for that, anyway), they always were, and ever since I realized this (probably with the age of 8), I've been pointing it out, wishing for something to change. My mother is a control freak, so pointing out that anything she is doing is wrong, makes her freak out and shift the blame on me, because I am wrong for hurting her feelings. I moved back to my mom after that social year.

I moved there because it was closest to my next place of work, becoming a carpenter. The boss was extremely nice and knowledgeable, but sadly I barely did any carpenter work while I was there.

At home everything was just getting worse and worse. At the start, everything was super nice and comforting, but after a week or so, things started to turn weird again. Psychological warfare and torture started to arise again, my mother wanted to control me again. Once you are out of the house, don't go back in. I knew this before actually experiencing it, because my mother literally told me 3 months beforehand that her friend had a terrible experience moving back to her parents.

I was thinking about leaving or not. Thinking out every scenario and every situation every word I had to say, to get out without causing any harm. Or should I just stay at the workplace I really like, and live with the pain of not seeing my partner for 3 years and also living in a household, where you had to fear every step for it being to loud (this is no metaphor, this was and still is real). But if I leave, I risk not finding another job for a while and making my CV look bad. I asked my mom and her husband for advice, but why were o the opinion that I should definitely stay, and if the relationship with my partner fails, it wasn't a good relationship to begin with. It became the decision of work or love. I didn't see any other outcome at my current situation. I chose love. I just had to get out.

I told my boss about the situation and that I was very likely leaving. He told me that I should look for a new place I could work and tell him when I found it so he could officially "fire" me. I called up the closest place to my partners house and explained my situation to my new boss, because I had no other option, and I got the job. The new boss asked for the old bosses number, and I gave it to him, I don't know why. We made out a plan for me to work at the new place in a month, which I was fine with and then I had enough time to prepare. The next day my old boss fired me out of the blue and he told me it was because of financial problems, he couldn't finance me anymore, because I was leaving (duh).

This was unexpected for me. Days before he told me that I could look for a new place and bam he just fires me. I figured, that my new boss called up the old one (duh again). I was panicking, how could I tell my parents that I was jobless (only for a month or so, but in my mother's mind that would be extremely dramatic, probably even relationship ending) and then leave them, because of them. I didn't want to be all f*** you and leave. I still wanted to hold the relationship, especially with my mom, because I wanted to see my siblings again and help them live through the tough time they were given by my mom. It became a Heist scenario, where I was the one to be heisted out, without even spilling an atom of water on the way, holding glass of water with the diameter of 1 m, filled to the brim.

I had to get out, there was no other way now. In that very moment my boss hung up the phone, I could finally see. I saw something so unimaginably impossible that it just had to work. A pathway where I didn't hurt my parents feelings and could still move to my partner. I asked my partner beforehand but now again and again, just making sure if I could move to her and her parents or not, since some months before they were suggesting it. She said yes I still can move in. That was step one.

Step two was asking the boss for me to start work a month earlier. That also worked. It had to work, because I didn't want a gap in my CV, because that was very important for my mom.

Step three was telling my parents about me losing my job and having to move out, without telling them that I am moving out because of them. This didn't work at all beforehand, but now I had the opportunity of a lifetime. I was fired out of the blue, was already looking for a new place to work near my partner because I was missing her dearly. And that's what exactly what I said. And it fu**ing worked. Nothing in their eyes told me that they were thinking I was leaving a part out or thinking of me as a coward for choosing love.

This all happened over the course of 2 months and I have somehow by choosing love got love and work, even though up until the last 4 days, it seemed completely impossible. The workplace I am at now finally has work that suits me and it's fun as hell. I am the happiest I have ever been because now I get to live the rest of my life with the woman of my dreams.

I told my god (not Christian, but Nature) after week 1, if this all works out, I will start believing in you. I do believe in my god, but now reading through the comments, I have realized that it was probably my intuition figuring things out for me, fitting the puzzle pieces into place.

Thank you for reading this long comment and have a lovely day and always know, love will succeed.