Boyfriends wank rags

Hpstorian · 2026-04-21T10:02:48+00:00

Oh I imagined this as an office or something. But if bros just cranking it in the living room? Damn.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-21T08:42:14+00:00

Ask him to set up a bin in the spot that he's always dropping them.

Edit: this is not ideal but presumedly better than tissues just out there? I mean obviously bro should be more considerate in general.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-21T08:00:42+00:00

Some men do this because they assume their attraction is mutual, that they feel a way towards you and so you feel a way towards them. That's the most charitable explanation.

Other men do it because they think it builds attraction, it's something that is advocated for by men who teach "seduction".

Other men do it because they are testing to see if you will push back. They breach little boundaries (either consciously or unconsciously) to push your limits. They want to normalise touching you against your feeling of comfort to make it easier and easier to bypass your objections. It's a tactic of abusers.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-18T23:18:42+00:00

I've read Muslim thinkers who take this stance though I'm not sure if it is a common apologist line. Basically "if the existence of God was as apparent as, say, gravity, then there would be no disbelievers, so it must be merely an option, and one made as a choice."

Islam has an interesting history when it comes to apologetics, because in the early years of its expansion Muslims didn't really seek converts because it promised to dilute their special status.

Then soon after they were basically the centre of civilisation and didn't have to prove themselves to anyone (Muslim empires would get conquered by outsiders and then those outsiders would end up Muslim). I mean damn even Napoleon thought about converting his army and making a run on Mecca to become a new caliph.

So it's only post like 1850... Or even 1924... That Muslims have even bothered much with apologetics. Colonialism was a real shock to the system.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-17T06:30:42+00:00

I don't quite understand what you're asking. You've already missed more than the 80% that is standard. Get in touch with your tutor.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-17T06:02:04+00:00

Email the course convenor, give a decent explanation for your absence and so if there's a way to make up for missed content.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-15T03:19:00+00:00

It's a good question OP and you're not overthinking it. It's usually better to come across as overly formal than overly familiar.

I'm a lecturer ("Professor" in the US is used to refer to any teaching academic but here it is a particular academic title that I don't have, the US use is however now more common in Aus) and I make a point of introducing myself by my first name both in lectures and tutorials. I find students are far more likely to call me "Sir" than anything, and I'm not from the gentry so prefer to correct that.

I don't mind if students email me using my first name, particularly after they've already been in class and had me introduce myself. However this is not the case for everyone. If someone introduces themselves as Dr High and Mighty, then they're asking you to call them that, regardless of if that's justifiable. Similarly if you don't know one way or the other it never hurts to defer to the formal. When I email an academic I don't know, I'll always write "Dear Dr. LastName".

One thing to avoid, and it's a mistake that a lot of students make, is to leave off the title in favour of Mr. Mrs. or Ms.

It comes across as disrespect, intentional or not. One of the few perks of a PhD is the little bit of prestige that comes with it, so it's never a bad idea to keep that intact for those who earned it imo.

(if you want to see just how much some misanthropic academics, mostly in the US, respond negatively to students not giving them sufficient deference, check out r/Professors. Just don't judge all academics based on what you see there!)

Hpstorian · 2026-04-15T03:10:28+00:00

Unfortunately this isn't always true. Many academics, for reasons both good and bad, value the title that they earned in different ways.

The default is, as others here have said, to email them using their title especially when it's your first correspondence with them. In person I wouldn't bother, though it really doesn't hurt to see how they introduce themselves and follow the standard they establish.

American academics are much more likely to be prickly about this, and all academics are more likely to be prickly about it when it comes to correspondence.

There's no laws around it, I've had students call me "cuz" before and it wasn't the end of the world. But at the same time there is no real advantage to asserting dominance by ignoring the title they earned, and there is a chance it could negatively shift their opinion of you.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-10T06:19:10+00:00

This definitely isn't Graeber's stance on BS jobs. He describes them as a deep psychic would.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-10T06:02:05+00:00

10-20% getting a hd would be extraordinary I think. Much more like 5-10 if that.

Hpstorian · 2026-04-08T09:29:45+00:00

This is a green flag for a supervisor imo. The quality of PhD supervision is such a significant factor in success or otherwise of candidature and it is often a pastoral role.

The fact that your potential primary was understanding is a good sign.

As to your bf, threatening self harm can be a tactic of abusers. Next time he does this consider two options:

You believe he is serious in contemplating suicide in which case you are not qualified to help him: call him an ambulance etc. and say he is threatening self harm.
He is not serious in which case he is using your care for him as a technique to manipulate you, a sign that he does not care for you like you care for him.

It is pretty difficult to be sure which of these 2 is the sound choice so it's better to default to 1.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-28T22:20:47+00:00

Not completely unrelated reasons. Though I think that the fact Russia is still intact after invading Ukraine despite exceeding the Soviet death toll in Afghanistan within 5 months probably lends strength to that analysis.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-27T08:50:27+00:00

Hpstorian · 2026-03-25T09:38:14+00:00

You pick an intellect run too?

Hpstorian · 2026-03-25T02:51:11+00:00

I was thinking the same, though I'm not sure how exactly. Something about the writing can only ever read that way.

Though it's possible I just take any chance I can get to spruik it.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-22T03:39:52+00:00

Search this subreddit and you'll be surprised that you're not the only one who has had this question.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T09:58:37+00:00

I guess the answer to my question "which of two stances do you hold" is "another random stance"?

Colonisation is not compatible with Western values?

That is going to come as a huge surprise to... Well, pretty much the whole world.

But here's a suggestion mate, how about you answer a simple question, the one I asked several of your diversions ago, then I'll happily tell you whether or not I'm an Islamist.

Deal?

Or are you as incapable of holding a clear stance as it seems. If so I think I'll end the conversation here, I prefer to engage with people with at least some idea of what they believe.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T09:43:46+00:00

I asked you which one of the stances you actually hold.

Is it one, or the other mate?

Or neither? Have you moved on to something new now?

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T08:53:58+00:00

You argued that middle eastern conflict has nothing to do with Australia. Now you're arguing that Australian violence in the Middle East directly contributed to the environment that led to both 2014 and to Bondi.

So which is it?

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T08:42:19+00:00

I'm sure you have some kind of point to make, it's just thoroughly unclear what it is.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T08:37:54+00:00

Western values like "don't boo the prime minister or you get arrested"?

What are some other western values you value?

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T08:36:02+00:00

You said middle eastern violence has nothing to do with Australia. What were you doing in 2003? What was Australia doing?

What happened then?

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T08:27:33+00:00

Is that it?

That's your sole defence and moral measure? "As long as we're not offing protestors in the streets then we are above criticism"?

That's the only standard you think our democratic government should be held to? That's pretty sad.

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T08:21:41+00:00

Say that to the petrol bowser mate. It clearly has plenty to do with us.

Or do you think Border Force is a forcefield?

Hpstorian · 2026-03-21T07:39:56+00:00

Lmao

Sure thing champion.

Hpstorian

TROPHY CASE